The Recovery Trail
by PKLizzard
Summary: Follows the recovery of Meredith after her liver surgery, through Derek's eyes. Covers all the main moments of the show as well as the in between that we don't get to see. Updates go up every Friday.
1. Day 0

**Day 0**

The harsh florescent lights of the recovery room make me squint. I never understood why they are so bright. The eyes of patients just waking up from anesthesia are sensitive and the lighting is just an extra slap in the face. Plus it makes Meredith look an even sicklier pale. She looks translucent, almost a ghost, from the blood loss involved with the liver surgery. The only interruption on her pale skin is the reflection of the lights on the oxygen mask over her face in place of the endotracheal tube that had been removed before leaving the OR. The nurse and orderlies count to three and shift her on a sling of blankets from a gurney to a bed. Once Meredith is settled into the bed a peach colored thermal blanket is tucked around her up to her waist. The orderlies leave with the gurney and the nurse, Kate according to her nametag, flutters about while I stand awkwardly just inside the doorway. Kate connects leads and makes sure the drains aren't blocked. I take an awkward sidestep to the corner almost laughing at the irony of the situation. I spend a lot of time in these recovery rooms, checking up on patients, but it feels like a very scary overwhelming place when I'm here as a family member. Kate hangs the IV bag from the pole beside the bed and makes sure the needle is secured to the back of Meredith's right hand before wrapping an automated blood pressure cuff to her left bicep and clipping a pulse ox monitor to her left index finger. Finally, Kate steps back almost as if she's admiring her work, before she grabs one of the rolling examination stools near the door and drags it over to the right side of Meredith's bed. She nods to me before grabbing the chart off the end of the bed. I drop down into the chair while she scribbles in the chart. I latch onto Meredith's hand, intertwining our fingers, and tracing the tape around the IV site with my thumb. I hear the chart thump back into the bucket and Kate clears her throat.

"I'll be back in about five minutes but she should be waking up shortly. If you need anything the call button is up there." Out of my peripheral vision I see her point towards behind the head of the bed. I nod, my eyes never leaving Meredith and the nurse slips away presumably to check on other patients. I scoot closer to the bed so my knees are pressed into the side. I gently place my hand over Meredith's cheek, running my thumb against the smooth plane of her cheekbone and squeezing her hand gently.

 _I'm here._

A minute goes by and there isn't a squeeze back which is a little disconcerting to be honest. I've gotten so used to her squeezing my hand back that it's weird to have her not react. The seconds tick by with the steady beeping of the heart monitor, while I wait patiently for any sign of wakefulness from Meredith.

After what feels like an eternity, there is the slightest hitch in her breathing, just a tiny little catch that's barely noticeable. I lean forward in my seat excitedly and run my hand through her hair.

"Meredith" I whisper. I'm disappointed when nothing happens. But then, then her fingers move just the tiniest bit, and her breathing picks up. I smile and release a breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding.

"It's okay, take your time, you're okay, the surgery went great." I tell her. She wraps her fingers around my hand and gives it a weak squeeze. I squeeze back gently and her fingers twitch again. Her nose wrinkles the tiniest bit under the mask and then her eyelids slide open.

"Hi." I breathe, with an ear to ear grin. There's a million mile away quality to her look but I can tell from her half lidded, droopy gaze that she's looking at me. The oxygen mask fogs up as she exhales and her eyes droop closed but the heavy weight of worry has already been lifted off my chest. I stroke her knuckles with my thumb and kiss her cheek. I pull away and the door slides open revealing the return of Kate. Meredith lazily opens her eyes at the sound and Kate puts on a huge grin.

"Dr. Grey it's good to have you back. How are you feeling?" Kate chirps and Meredith stares at her with a dull, unresponsive look. "Any pain or discomfort?" Meredith shakes her head slowly. "Do you feel sick or nauseous at all?" Kate prods.

"Little" Meredith mumbles quietly. Kate pulls the chart off the end of the bed and begins scribbling in it while Meredith nods off again. It's short lived though when Kate reaches for the controls and begins to raise the bed and Meredith's eyes snap open in surprise.

"Sorry Dr. Grey but I need you to do a few things for me." Kate smiles sympathetically before removing the oxygen mask and replacing it with a nasal cannula. Kate unwraps her stethoscope from around her neck and places it on Meredith's chest. She listens for a few seconds before giving a small nod of approval.

"Alright Dr. Grey can you try leaning forward for me?" Meredith obliges and, using my hand for leverage, pulls herself forward with some effort and a grimace of pain. Kate presses her stethoscope to Meredith's back. Meredith flinches at the chill but Kate carries on until she gives another satisfactory nod.

"Everything sounds good Dr. Grey, now I just need you to take a big breath in for me and cough to clear your lungs. Okay?" Kate hands Meredith a pillow to cushion her incision. Meredith inhales deeply and lets out a hacking cough. Her eyes go as wide as saucers as her pain receptors kick in and she lets out a tiny heart breaking whimper. I place my hand on her back gently slide it up and down in silent support.

"I know that hurt Dr. Grey but I really need you to give me one more cough to make sure your lungs are clear. Then I can give you painkillers and something for the nausea too." Meredith is unresponsive to Kate's words

"Meredith you need to cough again." I whisper in her ear, gently running my hand down her back. She swallows hard before taking another shaky breath and letting it out in a weak cough.

"Okay Dr. Grey you can lie back down." Kate says and Meredith collapses back into the bed and closes her eyes. Kate disappears momentarily before returning with a plastic cup. She snags one of the rolling tables that are pushed up against the back wall of the room and wheels it over so that it is positioned over Meredith's bed. Kate then turns around and begins rummaging around in one of the carts also positioned against the back wall of the room. She returns with a vial of what I assume is morphine and begins fidgeting with Meredith's IV.

"I've given you some morphine Dr. Grey that should help with the pain. Also I would like you to try a few ice chips." Meredith simply nods with her eyes still closed.

"Dr. Bailey will be by in a few minutes." Kate says turning to face me."She'll do an exam then we'll see about moving her to the post-op ICU." I nod and Kate goes off to check on her next patient. My gaze turns to Meredith, who is vacantly staring at the cup of ice chips in front of her. She looks more…relaxed with the morphine coursing through her system, but still miserable.

"Hey." I whisper, more to get her attention than anything else.

"Hi." She croaks, her head lolling to face me. Her voice sounds rough and exhausted and it cracks a little. Her gaze is somewhere past my right shoulder, far off in another universe.

"You know." I say scooting a little closer. "I don't usually bend the rules for patients, but I might be inclined to, you know, give you little special treatment." I wink conspiratorially before jerking my head in the direction of ice chips still sitting on the rolling table. Meredith's gaze turns towards the tray and, after a few moments of processing, she gives a small smile before shaking her head slightly. She slowly lifts her arm and brings it to rest on the tray before loosely wrapping her fingers around the cup and pulling it towards her lips. She takes a sip before lowering the cup and closing her eyes in relief for her sore throat. She opens her eyes and lets me take the cup from her.

"Better?" I ask, putting the cup back on the table.

"Yeah" She nods, her voice sounding a lot smother but equally as exhausted. Her eyelids droop before snapping back open then drooping again. This time her eyes stay closed and her breathing evens out.

"I love you." I whisper. She mumbles something incoherent before sighing a little. As she sleeps, I take the time to notice our surroundings. There are three beds in this recovery room, with Meredith's being in the middle. The bed I'm facing is unoccupied, awaiting its next patient. The bed behind me looks to be occupied by a gentleman who seems to have had some sort of ortho procedure done. He is leaps behind Meredith, just barely managing to escape the inviting tendrils of the drugs. There is a glass door in front of each bed and rails that could allow curtains to surround the beds on the ceiling. There are various carts and waste bins pushed up against the wall, and machines surrounding the beds. Bright fluorescent lighting shines down from the ceiling reflecting off the white walls and linoleum flooring. The beeps and hums of the machines fill the room along with the sound of people breathing. The hum is interrupted when the door in front of Meredith's bed slides open and Miranda Bailey marches in.

"Ah Dr. Shepherd, why am I not surprised." She greets me sarcastically before pulling the chart of the end of the bed and flipping through it. "How's my intern?"

"She's…hanging in there." I say, my gaze focused on Meredith's sleeping face.

She looks so peaceful when she's asleep.

Dr. Bailey takes in all the information from the monitor before scribbling it into the chart and dropping it back on the end of the bed. She pulls her stethoscope out of the pocket of her lab coat.

"Why don't you wake her up?" Bailey nods toward Meredith. I press my lips to her cheek and she sighs in her sleep, her warm breath brushing across my face.

"Meredith." I whisper and her nose crinkles just the tiniest bit. I back off and let her wake up slowly.

"Hey." I smile when she cracks her eyes open. "Dr. Bailey is here."

"Mmmm." Meredith moans.

"I don't want to hear any of that Grey." Bailey scolds. "I'm just going to take a look at your incision then we'll see about getting you upstairs." Meredith gives a weak nod and lets Bailey pull back the thermal blanket covering her abdomen. She flinches at the chill but other than that she is a passive participant in the whole ordeal. That is, until Bailey begins palpating her abdomen.

"Nnnnn owww." Meredith groans, squirming in the bed.

"Shhh. Deep breaths, it'll be over in a minute." I back up my words with a squeeze of her hand. She groans again but stays still until Bailey finishes up.

"Okay, I'm done." Bailey declares. "Everything looks normal so I'll talk to the nurse and get you upstairs." Bailey turns on her heel to leave but Meredith stops her.

"How's Thatcher?" Bailey turns to face her with a reassuring half smile.

"He pulled through. There were a few complications, but he'll be fine. He's down in room 6." Meredith absorbs the information with an unreadable look on her face. Bailey lingers for a moment, but when Meredith doesn't react, she turns and leaves. Meredith stares at the tiled ceiling for a moment before her gaze turns back to me.

"Are you okay?" I ask and all I get for a reply is a shrug.

"Can you…put the bed down?" She says, but her eyes speak volumes.

 _I hurt, please don't make me talk too._

I reach for the bed controls and put the bed in an almost level position. Meredith's eyes flutter shut and her breathing evens out as she succumbs to exhaustion. I sit in silence for a few minutes. The man in the other bed has woken up and is snuffling around a bit. The room hums with energy and I begin to feel the effects of exhaustion setting in. As I feel myself dozing off, a team of orderlies enters with a gurney and nurse Kate at the head of the group.

"We're gonna get her upstairs now." Kate says and I am slowly edged out of the way as the orderlies take their positions around Meredith's bed. They count to three and effortlessly shift her over to the gurney. The rails are snapped up and I am allowed back at Meredith's side. I grab her hand as Kate transfers the IV, drains and leads. We begin the trek up to the post-op ICU. We're rounding the corner to the elevator when I feel Meredith's fingers move beneath mine.

"Stop!" I call and the gurney stops abruptly. Meredith's eyes are open and wide as saucers, with fear written across her face.

"It's okay. We're just going upstairs to the ICU." Meredith relaxes and I kiss her gently before motioning that we can move again.

When we board the elevator her eyes are already closed again.

* * *

Meredith has a private room in the ICU most likely due to the Chief. It's a standard room with a bed, two chairs and thankfully a couch. The orderlies transfer Meredith to the bed while Kate signs the chart over to the new nurse; Ryan I believe is his name. He briefly rouses Meredith and introduces himself and he gets her to cough again before letting her fall back to sleep. He continues checking over the all the wires and tubes and sets up a PCA pump. Afterwards he slips out, saying he'd be back in an hour. I move to stand by Meredith's bed. I grab her hand and gently squeeze and she opens her eyes.

"Hey." I whisper. She blinks at me and smiles a little.

"Do you need anything?" I ask and she thinks for a moment.

"Drugs" She says. I reach for the PCA controller and hand it to her.

"Here, you have pump now. Just don't go to crazy." I tease her. She smiles just a little before her eyes dip closed.

"I'm gonna sleep on the couch okay?" I tell her. "I love you."

"M'love you." She mumbles.

* * *

 **AN: Welcome to my story! I'm going to try and upload every Friday from here on out. You've already read the summary so I won't waste your time with that however I will tell you this story leans more towards real life accuracy than the show. In the show the plot line is added so that Ellen Pompeo could take a break and have a baby. It will follow the main points of the show but some things will be different. Please enjoy and leave a review!**

 **Also if you have any good recommendations for a beta reader that would be REALLY helpful.**


	2. Day 1

**Day 1**

As easy as sleep comes for me, holding on to it is much harder. There is a steady flow of traffic through Meredith's room, from Alex, Cristina and Izzie coming to check up on Meredith, to Ryan doing his routine checks. I'm finally forced to give up on sleep when my pager beeps. I silence it quickly as to not disturb Meredith and Lexie who's sleeping with her head on the side of Meredith's bed. I groan when I see 911 scrolling across the screen followed by 3206, the patient Meredith and I were supposed to operate on yesterday afternoon. I never took myself off duty; I just pushed the surgery so I could be with Meredith. Everyone knew where I was but I don't think anyone wanted to disturb me. Now though it appears I can't put off work any longer. I get up off the couch and kiss Meredith's forehead before quietly leaving and making a mad dash for the Neuro wing. As I approach my patient's room I hear yelling and chaos.

"-blind. I can't fucking see. Do something." I hear the patient yell as I enter the room. The patient is thrashing around the in the bed while two nurses are trying to calm him down. His poor wife is huddled over in the corner crying at the scene in front of her.

"What happened?!" I yell over the commotion.

"He had a grand mal seizure and when he came to he said he couldn't see." One of the nurses called over her shoulder.

"Book an OR, we're taking him in." I tell the nurse before trading places with her.

"Get him a round of Thiopental." I order the other nurse. I put my hands on the patient's shoulders in order to restrain him, but he keeps fighting.

"Mr. Parker." I yell with no response. "Mr. Parker it's Dr. Shepherd. I need you to listen to me." I feel Mr. Parker relax under my grip a little. "I'm going to take you into surgery now, but you need to relax okay?" He relaxes completely as the nurse returns with the Thiopental. She wastes no time administering the drug. Mr. Parker grabs my wrist and holds on tight.

"You'll fix this right? I won't be blind forever?" He asks, his voice shaking.

"I'll do my best, I promise." I reassure him. Then the drugs kick in and we're off to surgery.

* * *

The clock on the scrub room wall reads 7:04 AM when I start scrubbing out of Mr. Parker's surgery. Mr. Parker is being wheeled of to recovery after a successful surgery. I have twenty-six minutes until I need to be on the floor for rounds. That gives me enough time to make a quick coffee stop then go check on Meredith. I hurry out of the scrub room and down the hall to the staff lounge for coffee. It isn't the best coffee but I'm more desperate to see Meredith than I am for a caffeine fix. I tap my foot impatiently as the well used coffee machine drips coffee into my cup. The machine just barely beeps, indicating it's done, before I have a lid on the cup and I am out the door. I speed walk to the post-op ICU but come to an abrupt halt in front of the window to Meredith's room. Lexie is still passed out at Meredith's bedside with her head on the bed and her hand holding Meredith's hand. I smile at the sight but I glance at my watch which tells me its 7:25. It's a bad rap for Attendings to be late to rounds so I make my way to the Neuro wing where I find a few residents and their interns waiting for me. At exactly 7:30 I begin rounds. I only have I few patients so rounds go by quickly and residents are sent off to do their jobs, interns in tow. I gather a pile of charts and paperwork that need my attention; I have an hour and a half until my first surgery of the day, so I take my stuff and make my way back to Meredith's room.

When I open the door, Lexie isn't anywhere to be found and Meredith is still sound asleep. I sit in the chair Lexie has vacated on the far side of Meredith's bed. I set my stack of work on the floor next to me, pulling the first document from the top and using a chart as a flat surface. I run my hand up and down Meredith's forearm absently while I write.

About half an hour in and a sizable chunk of work done, Meredith starts to stir. I set the chart I'm working on down on the floor and focus my full attention on her.

"Good morning sleepyhead." I smile when she cracks her eyes open. She blinks blearily and rubs the back of her hand across her face.

"You try stayin' wake with half a liver." She mumbles. I chuckle before moving sit on the side of her bed.

"How're you feeling?" I ask pecking her cheek gently.

"Mmm drugged" She giggles a little. "And sleepy" Her relaxed nature makes me smile.

"Well I'm quite tired too. Do you mind if I lie down with you?" I ask, anticipating the answer. She nods and awkwardly scoots over in the bed with a grimace. I gingerly slide in next to her, and her head falls on my chest and my arm gently rests across her chest, wary of her sore abdomen. Meredith checks out immediately, her soft snoring filling the room. I stare out the window watching the people pass by. Eventually that lulls me off into a much welcome doze.

I awake what feels like to soon to the vibration of my watch on my wrist reminding me I have surgery in twenty minutes. Meredith is still sleeping with her head on my chest. I try to wiggle out from under her but my efforts fail as she begins to stir.

"Hey." I whisper, settling back into the bed a little. "I have surgery, I have to go."

"Kay." She mumbles. She starts to fall back to sleep, but before I can stand, she grabs onto my scrub pants.

"Wait." She says.

"What's up?" I ask, brushing her hair back from her face.

"Can you get me something for the nausea?" She requests quietly. I nod and jump out of the bed quickly. Meredith makes a pained face at the jostling.

"Sorry I'm sorry." I apologize. "I'll go find Ryan." Lucky for me, I run into Ryan right outside the nurses' station

"Ryan!" I call out, chasing him down.

"Yes Dr. Shepherd?" Ryan asks turning to face me.

"Dr. Grey is requesting an anti-nausea agent." I say. Ryan nods.

"I'll get right on that sir." He says and I give him a rushed thank you before making the mad dash to OR 4 for my surgery.

* * *

After I scrub out from my surgery I make my way back to the post-op ICU, but this time to check on Mr. Parker. When I arrive at his room the door is open and I rap my knuckles on it lightly before entering the room.

"Mr. Parker, how are you feeling?" I ask and his head turns to look at me.

"I have a headache." He says. "But I can see so that's a plus." I nod and smile before pulling out my penlight and running through the series of checks.

"Okay Mr. Parker, there doesn't appear to be any lasting damage but I'll set up a consult with an ophthalmologist for you just to be sure." I reassure him.

"Thank you so much Dr. Shepherd." Mr. Parker says with a huge smile echoed by his wife. We say our final goodbyes and I exit the room, setting course for the cafeteria. I pick up the best looking salad, which still doesn't look that great, then head back upstairs to Meredith's room. When I arrive at Meredith's room Cristina is sitting on the couch doing charts and Meredith is staring blankly at the TV which is playing some sappy daytime show on mute. Cristina glances at me but she quickly goes back to her charts. Meredith's gaze doesn't break from the TV. I move to stand by her bed and gently peck her forehead.

"Hey." I whisper. Her gaze shifts slightly and her eyes look glassy with exhaustion and drugs.

"How are you feeling?" I ask and all I get is an incoherent grumble.

"Don't even bother McDreamy, she's doped to the high heavens." Cristina says from behind me. Undiscouraged by her words, I try again.

"Did the stuff Ryan gave you help?"

"Mhmm." Is the only response I get out of her.

"Mr. Parker made it through surgery." I tell her hoping it'll spark some enthusiasm.

"Who?" She asks, her words slurring.

"Mr. Parker, our tumor patient?" I remind her.

"Oh" She says. "S'good" Cristina snorts from behind me.

"Told you so." She snickers from behind me. Sighing in defeat I drop into the chair by Meredith's bed. I eat my salad while Cristina does her charts and Meredith stares off to planet Neptune. Eventually Izzie and Alex appear and we all sit in companionable silence. That is, until Meredith lets out a loud snore. A collective chuckle rolls through the room and one by one everyone begins to gather their things. They all file out one by one until I'm left with Meredith. I glance at my watch and sigh when I see I have half an hour to my next surgery. I get up to leave but as I reach for the door handle the door swings open and I jump back in surprise

"Sorry sorry. I'm sorry." Lexie cries equally surprised as I am.

"Shh don't wake her." I hiss.

"Sorry." Lexie whispers with a blush. She steps the rest of the way into the room and closes the door behind her.

"How's Thatcher? I ask.

"Good, He's good." Lexie says almost as if she's trying to convince herself. "His CBC and Chem 7 are normal and he's awake and lucid. He isn't rejecting the liver so that's good. That's really good."

"That's good." I placate. I've never really liked Thatcher but I figure Meredith will want to know when she gets back from her drug induced trip to Neptune.

"H-how's Meredith?" Lexie asks.

"She's okay. She's sky high right now but she's okay." Lexie smiles.

"Yeah, so is Dad." Lexie bites her lip as soon as the words leave her mouth. "I mean…Thatcher." I smile sympathetically.

"I have to go. Surgery." I excuse myself.

* * *

I'm almost done my surgery when my pager goes off.

"Can somebody check that please?" I call out before going back to the brain in front of me. One of the scrub nurses picks it up.

"Non-emergent to room 4207." She reads off.

That's Meredith's room.

 _Crap crap crap._

I take a deep breath and re-concentrate on the open brain in front of me. It's non-emergent so it can't be that bad. Maybe Meredith is just bored. Although, I'm not sure how someone could get bored being as stoned as she is. I finish the last stitch and hastily put my tools down, instructing the resident to close up. No sooner have I finished scrubbing out before I'm making the mad dash up to Meredith's room. I burst into the room panting.

"What's going on?" I breathe out, trying to catch my breath. Meredith is sitting up in her bed looking more aware this time. Ryan is standing on the far side of the bed and a woman I don't recognize is sitting on the foot of Meredith's bed. She's stick thin, with bleach blonde hair, too much makeup and she's wearing kakis and dark green polo which clashes horribly with the rest of her look.

"Dr. Shepherd, we're glad you could make it." The woman on the end of the bed gives me a fake, toothy smile. "I'm Deidre the PT and I'm going to get Dr. Grey standing and maybe even taking a few steps." Her voice is too cheery but I nod and smile along.

"Great." Deidre claps her hands together and gives another fake grin. "Dr. Grey what I'm going to need you to do is swing your legs over the side of the bed just like we did earlier."

She'd done this earlier? Why didn't I know? Why wasn't I paged? I should have been here.

I'm pulled from my spiraling thoughts when Meredith lets out a small moan of discomfort as she swings her legs over the side of her bed. I step past Deidre and sit on the bed next to Meredith, placing a reassuring hand on her back and running it up and down the patch of skin exposed by the hospital gown. She relaxes a little and sits catching her breath. Deidre stands in front of her expectantly but I ignore her and give Meredith's shoulder a squeeze.

"Whenever you're ready." I whisper and Meredith nods. She sits for a few moments but then she takes a deep breath and begins to lean forward. Her feet touch the floor and Deidre shifts to help her stand. As Meredith pushes herself off the mattress I stand with her, my hand now resting supportively on the small of Meredith's back. Meredith supports herself on Deidre's shoulders and Deidre has her hands on Meredith's sides, helping her keep her balance. I start moving my hand up and down Meredith's back in support. Meredith simply pants hard.

"Very good Dr. Grey." Deidre encourages Meredith. "Why don't you try taking a step for me?" Meredith shakes her head.

"…No" She is barely heard.

"You can do it Dr. Grey." Deidre tries again but to no avail as Meredith stays exactly where she is.

"You can do it Meredith." I say giving her shoulder a supportive squeeze and moving closer as a silent show of unity. Meredith swallows hard before shaking her head again. I shift slightly, nudging Deidre out of the way and replacing her hands with mine on Meredith's sides. Meredith wraps her arms around my neck and rests her sweaty forehead on my chest.

"You can do this Mer." I lean down and whisper in her ear. I feel her shake her head against my chest.

"Yes you can, just one tiny step." This time she doesn't disagree, and then she shuffled her left foot forward just the tiniest bit. I could feel her toes touching mine through my cross-trainers.

"That's it, you did it." I smile and she moves her right foot forward. I step back to give her more space and she shuffles forward again. The pressure stockings she's wearing make it more like sliding across the floor, but I couldn't care less. Deidre watches on scowling, probably because I could get her to walk but again I couldn't care less. We make it half way across the room before Meredith stops me.

"…break" She pants. I stop and she leans almost her full body weight on me.

"You did really well." I praise her. She simply nods and we stand there while she rests.

"Do you want to go back to bed?" I prompt her after a few minutes. She nods and leans back so she's supporting most of her own weight again. I turn us around so Meredith can shuffle back. The trip is a little slower this time, attributed to Meredith's exhaustion. When we get back to the bed, Meredith collapses into it. Deidre excuses herself saying she'll be back later to try again. Ryan reattaches the leads and IV wires but Meredith is oblivious. As soon as Ryan leaves, she reaches for the PCA pump, hitting the button a few times.

"M'sorry didn't tell you bout earlier." She mumbles, closing her eyes.

"It's okay I'm not mad." I say sincerely. I figure she has a good reason and she's so tired that I don't bother pushing it.

"You were…surgery. S'why Cristina was here." She says. "S'why I…high. She gives a little laugh.

"I didn't think you would remember that." I laugh too. Just like that though, she's in a different world of drugs and exhaustion

* * *

I sit in Meredith's room for the rest of the day doing paperwork and signing off on charts. Meredith drifts in out of sleep, but never really escapes the drugged haze. There's a steady flow of traffic through the room with all the well wishers dropping in giving their well, their well wishes. Cristina, Alex, Izzie, Lexie, Mark, Bailey and the Chief all stop by at one point or another. Ryan comes by with some orange juice and crackers. He rouses Meredith enough to get her to finish off the snack. After a few sips he is satisfied and leaves. It's around dinnertime when Deidre returns.

"Do you think if I act drugged enough she'll let me off the hook?" Meredith asks as we watch Deidre approach from around the nurses' station

"I don't think so." I say with a smile.

"Damn." Meredith mumbles right before Deidre waltzes in with Ryan in tow.

"Dr. Grey, are you ready to try walking again?" Deidre asks cheerfully.

"Not really." Meredith mutters under her breath but throws back the blankets she's swathed in and swings her legs over the side of the bed. Deidre positions herself in front of Meredith and I stand near the door this time, simply a spectator. Ryan unhooks everything again except for the IV. Deidre rolls the IV pole in front of Meredith.

"Okay Dr. Grey I want you to use the IV pole for balance this time." Deidre instructs and Meredith nods. She uses Deidre's outstretched hand for leverage to stand before leaning fully on the IV pole. She makes it to the door of the room and back to bed only stopping to rest next to me against the wall for a moment. Deidre gives words of encouragement the entire way and is overly excited when Meredith makes it back to the bed. Meredith brushes it off as she sits back in bed and Ryan begins to reconnect everything. Deidre finally leaves and Ryan follows shortly after. Meredith presses the PCA pump a few times. I push myself off the wall and walk over to her, dropping a kiss on her forehead.

"I'm proud of you." I tell her.

"For walking?" She snorts incredulously. I nod.

"Hey that's hard stuff 24 hours post-op from major abdominal surgery." I say. She just shakes her head in disbelief and I drop the subject. Next thing I know the morphine has kicked in and she's back on planet Neptune. I leave to run a few errands around the hospital and grab dinner from the cafeteria. I return to Meredith's room where I find her out cold and snoring away. I eat my dinner before kicking off my shoes and crashing on the couch. It isn't until I'm lying down that I realize how tired I am. I settle in and take solace in the fact that tomorrow is my day off. I roll onto my left side so I'm facing Meredith's bed.

"Goodnight Mer, I love you." I whisper into the darkness.


	3. Day 2

**Day 2**

Many physicians agree that day two post-op is the hardest for patients. I'm a physician who, after years of experience, believes in that statement. That is further cemented when I am woken up early this morning by my wife's pitiful hiccupping sobs. I untangle myself from my blankets and make a frantic stumble to Meredith's bedside.

"Mer…Meredith what's wrong." I mumble, trying to wipe the sleep from my eyes. In the faint light slanting through the windows I can see Meredith struggling to reach for some non-existent point on the other side of her bed.

"Meredith" I say again, more forcefully this time in hopes to get her attention.

"Derek." She moans, her body sagging back against the pillows she's propped up on. "I can't….drugs…I need…can't…can't reach." She sniffles and claws at the side of the bed again.

"Shh." I say in my most relaxing voice. "Shh slow down. It's okay." I tell her.

"Noo" She moans which breaks off into a sob. The sound stabs an ice cold dagger into my heart and shatters it. "I can't…I-I"

"You can't what?" I ask gently wiping the tears from her cheeks.

"Drugs…I can't." She whines as she claws at the side of the bed again. Suddenly it all starts to click. I see the thick wire that connects to the PCA pump run down the edge of the bed and drop of the side.

"You can't reach the PCA." I state more than ask. I move to the other side of her bed and pick up the pump before pressing the button a few times. I return the pump to the side of the bed and Meredith proceeds to grab it and jam her thumb on the button a few more times. I pour her a cup of water and turn to hand it to her. She doesn't make any move to grab it, instead opting to open her mouth and let me put the straw in her mouth for her. She takes a few sips before letting the straw go. I put the cup down on the table and turn back to Meredith, pushing her bangs out of her face.

"Jesus Meredith you're all sweaty." I blurt before I even have a chance to filter the thought.

"Yeah" She agrees absently

"I'll be right back." I tell her before slipping into the bathroom. In there I grab a washcloth and run it under lukewarm water, before returning to the other room.

"Meredith?" I call out quietly to see if she's awake.

All I get in reply is a half-hearted, "Mmm?"

"I'm going to help you clean up okay?" I tell her as I step up to the side of her bed

"M'kay" Meredith mumbles. Her eyes are closed and her head is tipped back slightly like she fell asleep briefly before waking up again and not bothering to move. I hesitate for a moment; I considering just letting her go back to sleep but I decide to press the washcloth to her face and feel her relax under my fingertips. I wipe the sweat of her brow and the rest of her face before continuing down to her neck and shoulders. I do as much as I can before I have to stop.

"Meredith." I whisper. "I need unbutton the top of your gown. Okay?"

I don't expect an answer so I'm surprised when I get a sleepy "Kay"

I undo the shoulder snaps and pull the gown down that it's just barely keeping her decent. I pull the blankets over her to help her keep warm before I began to wipe her upper chest. I pause for a moment with my palm splayed flat across her left breast, just feeling her heartbeat. The moment is broken though by Meredith's giggle.

"Are you trying to feel me up?" She smirks at me with a small sparkle shining through the exhausted and drugged haze clouding her eyes.

"Maybe" I wiggle my eyebrows suggestively before resuming cleaning her up. I move down below her breasts before I pull the gown back up and re-snap the shoulders. I gently peck her lips and turn to dispose of the washcloth

"My legs aren't shaved." Meredith blurts unexpectedly.

"What?" I ask, not sure I heard her right.

"My legs aren't shaved. How are we going to have kinky hospital bed sex if my legs aren't shaved?" Meredith deadpans. I can't hold back the small laugh that escapes my lips. Clearly the morphine is talking

"I wasn't really planning on having kinky hospital bed sex." I say and Meredith sighs dramatically.

"But you keep feeling me up. I'm horny and I want dirty hospital bed sex." She whines.

"Sorry Mer, but it's against doctor's orders." I tell her apologetically. She sighs again but has no retort. I return to the bathroom to throw the washcloth in the used linens basket. When I reenter the hospital room, Meredith's eyes are closed and her breathing is even. The alarm clock on the table beside the bed glows 5:34. I drop into one of the chairs and grab Meredith's hand. I don't bother trying to back to bed; rounds will be starting in a little under half an hour.

* * *

The next thing I know, Dr. Bailey marches in followed by a bunch of residents and interns.

"Who's presenting?" Bailey asks. One of Alex's interns steps forward.

"Um, Dr. Meredith Grey thirty-three. Post-op day two from a live liver donation. Has been responding well to antibiotics and painkillers and is on course to be moved to step-down care later today. She is scheduled for a MRI and CT to check for any residual bleeding." The intern finishes presenting and steps back into the herd of people. Normally the patient is woken during rounds but since Meredith is a VIP the formality is forgone.

"I'm assuming you'll pass that on Dr. Shepherd." Bailey demands more than she asks but I nod anyway.

"Absolutely"

"Okay then. She's scheduled for imaging at 9." Bailey gives me one last nod before everyone files out of the room. Meredith stirs slightly but she resettles and the room descends into quiet. I consider going back to sleep, but I'm one of those people where once I'm up I'm up and there's no going back. In spite of this fact, I lean back in my chair and close my eyes. I interlace my fingers with Meredith's. I start to doze off and it feels like nanoseconds later when I feel Meredith's fingers move within mine. The clock however reads 8:07. Meredith is peering groggily at her surroundings.

"Hey." I whisper to get her attention. Her gaze snaps to me but it takes her a second to respond

"Hi."

"How are you feeling?" I ask. She shrugs which causes her to wince which is all I really need for an answer.

"That good huh?" I chuckle with a hint of concern.

"I'm okay I guess. I just feel like I got bowled over by a good sized car." She elaborates.

"You know that okay and being hit by a car don't usually go hand in hand right?" I smirk and she mocks my expression.

"On a completely unrelated note, you slept through rounds." I tell her.

"They let me do that?" She asks incredulous. "Bailey let me do that?"

"She did. You have more pull than you realize." I smile at her shocked expression. "Anyway my point in telling you that is that you have scans at nine…" I pause to look at the clock. "…and it's 8:13"

"M'kay." Meredith mumbles; her energy is fading fast.

"I'll let you sleep." I tell her.

"Wait!" She mumbles. "Can you…while I…go home."

"You want me to go home?" I'm surprised by this request.

"Yeah…while I…scans….need…want…stuff." She's barely making sense at this point but I get the idea.

"You want me to go home while you're getting scans and get your stuff?" I clarify.

"Mhmm"

"Okay." I promise. I sit down in my seat again and taking her hand. A short while later the orderlies are knocking on the door with a gurney. Meredith is shifted from the bed to the gurney and wheeled down to imaging. I accompany her to the door of the CT room. Bailey is there waiting and raises her eyebrows at me, challenging me to beg her to let me be in the room. Instead I turn and place a chaste kiss on Meredith's cheek. I stand up straight before nodding at Dr. Bailey and turning to leave. I make a quick stop at my office to grab my keys and my briefcase before making a beeline to the parking lot.

* * *

My trip home is uneventful. I pick up clothes for Meredith and myself as well as a few books for Meredith, a couple extra blankets that are much more comfortable than the hospital ones and our pillows off our bed, Next thing I know I'm out the door and pealing out of the driveway. I don't break any speed limits on my way back, but there are a few questionable yellow lights. I pull into my staff parking spot near the front doors. I lock my car and head for my office where I pick up a few of my emergency toiletries that I keep for nights on-call. I head back to Meredith's room in the post-op ICU. It doesn't surprise me when she's not there but when I ask the nurse where she's been moved to, my heart starts to race.

"She's in the General ICU." The nurse tells me with a sympathetic smile. I give rushed thanks before walking with extreme purpose to the General ICU. I'm barely through the sliding doors when the nurse looks up at me.

"Cubicle 7." She says pointing down the hall. I nod and head towards the cubicle. Through the sliding glass door I see Meredith, no worse for wear, asleep in the bed in the center of the room. Bailey is sitting in one of the visitor chairs with a stack of charts. I quietly enter the room and Bailey looks up.

"She's okay. They needed the bed in post-op but I wasn't comfortable moving her to step down just yet." Bailey reassures me with uncharacteristic softness. "Her scans were fine but I wasn't happy with her platelets so I ordered a transfusion." I notice the transfusion machine holding the bag of dark red blood behind the hospital bed and the thick wire winding its way down to the IV site on Meredith's hand.

"Okay." I say. I'm surprised by how shaky and relieved my voice sounds. Bailey stands and gathers her charts.

"She said lying on her back was uncomfortable so we gave her a dose of Diazepam to help with muscle spasms. It knocked her out cold but it should be wearing off soon." Bailey tells me before she leaves the room sliding the door shut behind her.

Contrary to what Bailey told me before it takes Meredith a solid two hours to begin to escape the inviting sleep of the drugs. In the mean time, the nurse, Melissa, slips in and out checking on Meredith about every fifteen minutes or so. Other than that I'm left with my thoughts until Meredith begins to stir. After that moment it takes her another couple of minutes to crack her eyes open.

"Hey there Sleeping Beauty." I smile and lean forward in my seat. Instead of answering, Meredith lets out a huge yawn. I chuckle at the sound but her glare shuts me up.

"Mmm sure I'm real beautiful right now." She grumbles.

"You're always beautiful to me." I give her my best cheesy grin.

"Cheesy" She snarks. We're quiet for a few minutes before Meredith breaks the silence.

"Why am I in the ICU?" She asks, curiously looking around at her surroundings.

"Bailey wasn't comfortable with your platelet count so she ordered a transfusion. Because of that, she didn't feel comfortable sending you to step-down but they needed the bed in post-op." I explain. Meredith just nods at the explanation.

"How do you feel?" I whisper.

"Woozy" Meredith replies. "and a little nauseous."

"Do you want me to get the nurse?" I sit up a little straighter. "Melissa was just in here a few moments ago but I'm sure I could track her down."

"Not right now." Meredith says and her eyes dip close for what is longer than a blink.

"I brought you your pillow from home." I tell her. She perks up a little at that.

"Can I have it?"

"Sure" I say reaching over and grabbing it off the top of the duffel bag that I'd left beside the chair. She takes it and with the hand that isn't being pinned down by an IV and pulls the hospital pillow she's propped up on out from behind her head and hands it to me before replacing it. She snuggles into the pillow before crossing her arms over her chest and wincing.

"Can you get me a heated blanket?" She asks. I nod before going out into the hall and grabbing the blanket from one of the heaters in at a supply station. When I return, Meredith's eyes are closed and her breathing is even. I pull the blanket over her body, all the way up to her chin, and I tuck her in. She subconsciously adjusts to the new temperature before sighing in contentment. I'm surprised when I glance at the clock to see that it's only 11:30. I rifle through the pile of books that I'd chucked in the duffel bag and pull out one that looks good. I'm a few chapters in when the door slams open and Lexie rushes in followed by Cristina.

"I heard…from one of the nurses." Lexie pants. "Is she okay?"

"She's fine Lexie." I reassure her. "Bailey wasn't ready to send her to step-down but they needed the bed in post-op." I give them the abridged version. Lexie sags in relief before she drops down into the other visitor's chair.

"The nurses are making bets on if she'll make it through the night." Cristina offers as an explanation. She looks a lot more composed than Lexie but I can see hints of relief written across her face.

"You guys can sit with her for a while." I offer. "I need to eat and shower and stuff." I stand and give my seat to Cristina. I grab my clothes and give Meredith a peck on the forehead before exiting the room on course for the Attendings Lounge. Unsurprisingly, on the way there, I am offered quite a few sympathetic looks and well wishes.

After a hot shower I head to the cafeteria and pick up a sandwich. I sit by myself in the corner so I'll be out of the way. I haven't even taken a bite yet when a tray is dropped down in front of me. Mark slides into the seat across from me.

"Hey man I heard about Grey." Mark says

"She's fine. She needed blood so Bailey didn't want to send her to step-down but they needed the bed in post-op." I brief him. He doesn't say anything for a moment.

"Figured as much. I have good money on her making it through the night."

"Cut me in for half?" I ask.

"Deal" He says and we shake on it. We continue eating our lunch in relative silence. In the twenty minutes it takes me to devour my sandwich, Callie, Owen and two of Meredith's interns approach me asking about Meredith. I give them all the same assurances which satisfy everybody. As lunch comes to a close Mark's pager beeps and we go our separate ways.

* * *

When I return to Meredith's room, Meredith is awake and Lexie is chatting away. Meredith doesn't look the least bit interested in what Lexie is saying. In fact she looks seconds away from falling asleep; the only thing keeping her awake is her desire not to hurt Lexie's feelings. Lexie doesn't notice my presence but Meredith turns her head towards me. Her eyes speak volumes

 _I'm so tired. Please shut her up._

"How's Thatcher Lexie?" I ask in an attempt to side track her. She looks startled by my sudden presence but that doesn't stop her for long.

"He's good. They sent him down for images a little while ago. That's actually how I heard Meredith was here." Lexie rambles excitedly. "Actually he should be done soon so I should go check on him. Don't worry I'll be back though." She jumps out of her chair and leaves the room rather quickly.

"That was easy." I mumble as I sit

"Thank you." Meredith says faintly.

"How are you feeling?"

"I've a headache. I dunno if it's the drugs or the blood but Lexie didn't help. I feel nauseous, and like someone's tryin'a squeeze my insides to a pulp. Plus, the nurse said I can't have more drugs." Meredith grumbles. I give her a little sympathetic smile before I reach to put my hand on her cheek. I run my fingers through her hair and her eyes dip closed in pleasure.

"I'm sorry you don't feel well." I empathize. Meredith doesn't say anything, she just closes her eyes. Within minutes, her breathing is even and she's asleep. I sit there, just staring at her face and admiring her beauty, until the nurse slips into the room quietly.

"Are you sure she can't have anymore meds?" I ask before she has a chance to even pick up Meredith's chart.

"I'm sure." Melissa says sounding genuinely sympathetic. "She's controlling her own pain which she's maxed out on. I can only give her a little of the anti-nausea agent because of the blood transfusion. However, she just finished off the blood which should help with the headache." She moves on to check Meredith's vitals and disconnect the line for the blood transfusion. She's quick and efficient and out of the room a few minutes later. I pick up the book I had been reading earlier and begin reading again. Melissa is the only visitor for a while. Izzie and Alex poke their heads in as does Mark, but all their visits are very brief. A resident and his intern stop by to take Meredith's blood. Up until this point, Meredith had slept through everything. The intern wakes her up, and I can't help but cringe along with her as the intern misses Meredith's vein three times before he finally sticks it. She falls back to sleep quickly and I go back to my book. I've just finished the book when Bailey enters the room.

"Her blood work came back clean; we're ready to move her to step-down." Bailey gets right to the point.

"Okay." I don't know what else to say. She motions for a team of orderlies to enter the room. They bring yet another gurney and count to three before shifting Meredith onto it. She doesn't stir for the whole ride down to step-down care. They transfer her to her new bed without her waking and everyone quietly files out of the room. A new nurse comes in and introduces herself as Jeanie, but after she checks Meredith over and gets her to clear her lungs she's leaves and it's just Meredith and I. I set up my bed on the couch which is positioned under the window. The clock on the wall reads 7:20. I'm surprised at how late it's gotten. I settle myself in one of the visitor chairs and grab one of the crappy magazines off the bedside table. I've barely opened it when the door swings open and Mark comes in.

"Hey man." He whispers. "Here's your half." He hands me $30 and a tuna melt from the cafeteria.

"Someone bet a tuna melt?" I joke.

"Nah just thought you might be hungry." He says.

"Thanks." I say as I open the tuna melt. Mark drops in the other visitor's seat and grabs the TV remote. He turns the TV on to ESPN which is playing Mariners versus The Angels. We sit and watch the game in companionable silence. We make it to the 7th inning before Meredith starts to stir.

"S'goin on." She mumbles, rubbing her hands over her face. My attention turns to her and Mark mutes the game.

"Hey." I smile. "Mark and I were just watching the baseball game." Meredith snuffles around for a minute still waking up.

"Okay." She finally says.

"You got moved to step-down."

"I see that." She says taking stock of her surroundings.

"How're you feeling?" I inquire

"Sick of that question." She mumbles. "But otherwise I'm okay. Just tired."

"You can go back to sleep." I assure her. "Mark and I can entertain ourselves."

"Kay" She mumbles closing her eyes.

"Goodnight Meredith I love you."

"Love ya."

* * *

 **AN: I forgot an author's note last chapter. Oops my bad. Anyway thanks for reading! Meredith had a tough time this chapter but recovery is a rollercoaster. There are ups and downs although I can assure you this is a kiddie rollercoaster so the dips won't be that big A reviewer asked me not to kill Derek. I'm not sure where you got the idea I would from but I promise I won't. Also on a completely unrelated note, I have yet to watch season 12 of Grey's. To be honest I don't really want to anymore. I might get around to it we'll see. Anyway that's all. Please drop a review on your way out!**


	4. Day 3

**Day 3**

I yawn into my coffee for what feels like the millionth time this morning. It's only 7 in the morning and I feel wiped. Mark and I had stayed up until eleven watching the baseball game then I had turned in on the lumpy uncomfortable sofa in Meredith's room. I had tossed and turned all night trying to find a comfortable position to no avail. I longed to climb into bed with Meredith, not because it'd be comfortable, but because Meredith was there. But I can't do that for fear of hurting her. The other day she'd been so hopped up on drugs that I could have bit her and she would have felt nothing. Now though, she's being weaned off and I really don't want to hurt her. So here I am, leaning up against the nurses' station going over the chart for my one surgery today, feeling absolutely exhausted. I feel a presence beside and look up to see the Chief reaching over the desk for a pen.

"Chief" I greet him. "I actually needed to find you."

"What for?" He asks scribbling in a chart.

"I wanted to talk to you about leave after Meredith is discharged."

"Sure thing." He smiles. "Why don't we head to my office so I can put it in the computer?" I nod and follow him down the hall, across the catwalk and to his office where we take our respective seats.

"So how much time were you thinking?" Richard asks as he logs on to his computer.

"Well Bailey said she'd probably discharge Meredith four days from tomorrow, so this Friday." I say "I have that weekend off so I was thinking just extending that by four days." The Chief nods and types something into his keyboard.

"Okay" He nods and types some more. "You have plenty of vacation time if you want more time off."

"I know." I sigh. "I would but Meredith and I talked about it and she thinks we'll drive each other crazy after a week. I'm planning on taking lighter shifts and giving myself more days off so I can be home a little more." We had talked about it at three o'clock this morning when Meredith had gotten up to go to the bathroom. I had gotten up to help her and she had mumbled something about the hovering which had turned into a discussion about time off.

"I understand" Richard says pulling me from my thoughts. "Let me know if you need more time though." I nod and stand to let myself out of the office. However, a thought stops me in my tracks.

"I appreciate your help Chief." I thank him. "I know with the merger this is inconvenient timing."

"It's not a problem." He offers.

"Can I ask one more favor?" Richard looks at me motioning for me to continue.

"On nights that I'm on call can you make sure that Yang, Karev, Stevens or Little Grey is off? Just so that someone can be there for Meredith just in case." I feel like I'm begging a little but the Chief just nods and makes note of it.

"I'll do my best." He gives me a friendly smile.

"Thanks" I say as I let myself out of his office.

* * *

I'm scrubbing out of my one surgery for the day when my pager goes off. It's a 911 to the pit and I sigh. All my plans of hiding out in Meredith's room and doing paperwork are shattered. I make the familiar jog down to the pit and find it in its usual chaos. Before I have a chance to ask a nurse where I'm needed Owen spots me and pulls me into a trauma room. There is a tiny body lying unconscious on the gurney and a nurse standing by its head pumping an ambo bag.

"John Doe about seven years old." Owen recites. "Was found in a back alley beat up. Severe head and chest trauma. No signs of what happened to him or who did this." I nod stoically and begin my examination. Cases like this are always hard. Cristina comes running into the room and Owen briefs her on the case. She gets to work and pretty soon we're calling out orders for scans and tests. His blood is taken and he's subjected to every test we can do in the tiny trauma room. Soon enough though, we're prepping him for transport. We begin to wheel him to imaging when he starts to crash. The hallway fills with activity and people.

"Charge to 200." Owen calls out into the chaos. "Clear" The little body jumps and a shaky heartbeat registers on the monitor. Cristina puts her stethoscope to his chest and curses.

"Damnit he dropped a lung. Scans are gonna have to wait." She diagnoses looking at me for approval.

"I can live with a portable CT." I assure her. With those words we're moving again. We burst into the OR and the surgical team takes over while Cristina, Owen and I scrub in.

"Who would do this to a kid?" Owen asks as we all stare through the window watching the OR team prep the little boy.

"Bastard" Cristina grumbles.

"Agreed" I say. We continue scrubbing in silence before we all file into the OR ready to save this kid.

"It's a beautiful day to save lives everybody." I recite. "Let's have some fun."

Halfway through the surgery a nurse shows up at the door panting.

"They've identified him." She pants. "Evan Walters, 7, was beat by his step-father who then dragged the body to the alley behind the family apartment complex thinking he was dead." She reads off a sheet of paper. A slew of cuss words fly about the room at the misfortune this poor boy has suffered.

"His biological father is out in the waiting room." She tells us before letting herself out of the operating room.

"Jackass" Cristina mumbles and murmurs of agreement chorus through the room.

* * *

Owen, Cristina and I make our way the waiting room a good three hours later. We find two people there, a young woman looking to be no older than twenty four and an older, frazzled looking man who's probably in his late thirties.

"Mr. Walters?" Owen calls out and the man stands up straight.

"Yes?

"I'm Dr. Owen Hunt and these are doctors Cristina Yang and Derek Shepherd." Owen motions to each of us respectively. "We're the surgeons on your son's team."

"Is he…Is he alright?" Mr. Walters is trembling.

"He made it through surgery." I start out with the good news. "But the damage to his brain is severe. If he wakes up, we're not sure how much function he'll have." Mr. Walters collapses into one of the waiting room chairs with his head in his hands.

"How did this happen?" He chokes. "This isn't fair." He sniffles and we wait patiently for him to compose himself.

"We can take you to see him." Owen offers as Mr. Walters' sobs die down to sniffles. Mr. Walters nods and we all make our way out of the waiting room and down the hall to the Pediatric ICU.

"Oh" Mr. Walters stops in the doorway of Evan's ICU room. The sight in front of us is one that would choke anyone up. A small little boy who's been beaten to a pulp and is now surrounded by tubes and wires and monitors is hard to stomach.

"You can sit with him." I urge. Mr. Walters silently moves forward and sits beside Evan's bed.

"Dr. Yang will be monitoring Evan." Owen says. "If you have any questions or concerns you can have her or a nurse page us." Mr. Walters only nods and we all file out of the room to give him privacy.

"Where's the mother?" Cristina asks the nurse who she hands Evan's chart to.

"Giving her statement to the police." The nurse says. "It sounds like the guy wasn't discriminative of who he hit." We all give a collective sigh before we part our separate ways.

* * *

"Hey" I greet Meredith as I let myself into her room.

"Hey" She says absently. She's watching TV but she's not really focused on it.

"How are you?" I ask as I sit down in my chair at her bedside. She reaches for the remote and turns off the TV.

"Tired…Slow" She mumbles.

"It's the drugs." I tell her even though she knows that. She nods.

"How are you?" She asks. I sigh. It's a loaded question that I don't really want to burden her with.

"I'm okay." I lie

She sees right through that. "No you're not."

"I…" I run my fingers through my hair. "Tough case." Meredith nods in understanding.

"Do you want to talk about it?" She asks, lacing her fingers through mine in a silent show of support.

"Kid in the ER. His step-dad beat him to a pulp then left him in a back alley to die." I swallow hard. "He's got a low chance of waking up and a lower chance of waking up without brain damage."

"That sucks." Meredith states. I can't help but agree with her.

"He's seven years old." I mumble under my breath. "His poor father is a mess."

"I thought you said he beat him." Meredith looks confused.

"His biological father." I clarify. Meredith bites her lip and plays with a loose thread on the blanket.

"What about the mom?"

"Also a victim of the step-dad." I tell her.

"That's shitty." Meredith says looking at the blanket solemnly.

"Yeah" There's not really more to say than that. We sit in companionable silence and enjoy each other's company. I stare out the window on the far side the room while Meredith strokes the back of my hand with her thumb. My trance is broken by her yawn and when I look over; her eyelids are struggling to stay at full mast

"You can go to sleep." I assure her. "I'm sorry if I kept you up." She shakes her head, but her eyes droop closed anyway. They stay closed for a few seconds and I think she's well on her way to sleep. However her eyes crack open and she awkwardly shimmies over to the far edge of the bed; she pats the open space on the bed and looks at me expectantly.

"No" I say putting my hands up in a surrender-like gesture. "I don't want to hurt you."

"You won't." She reassures me, but I still don't budge. She bats her eyelashes and pouts at me.

"Please?"

"Okay" I sigh in defeat. It really doesn't require that much convincing because I really do want to climb into bed with her. I push down the rail of the bed and carefully climb in beside her. I lie on my side and our bodies are barely touching. I rest my chin on her shoulder and she grabs a fistful of the front of my scrub shirt. She sighs contentedly and her eyes close. She's out for the count in seconds flat.

I startle awake at the incessant beeping of my pager. I quickly quiet it as to not disturb Meredith.

* * *

"Shit." I mutter as I see 911 for Evan's room number. I quickly but carefully disentangle myself from Meredith and her bed. I make a mad dash to Evan's room and grind to a halt outside the door to compose myself. I enter the room quietly but stop abruptly when I see a pair of little eyes looking back at me.

"He's awake." I blurt dumbly. I look at Owen and he nods.

"I thought you'd want to do a check." Owen says and he steps away from the side of Evan's bed.

"Hi Evan." I say quietly so he isn't scared. "I'm Dr. Shepherd. I'm a brain doctor." Evan looks up at me with eyes as wide as saucers. "Do you mind if I do a little check up?" He nods a little. "Good. First, I need you to remember three words for me. Cat, bus, purple, can you do that?" He nods and I continue through all the routine tests. I have him follow my finger and I test his pupillary response. When I'm done all that he repeats the three words in a small, meek voice.

"Everything looks good." I say, addressing Evan's dad. "There doesn't appear to be any damage."

"Oh thank god." Mr. Walters breathes. He rests his head on the bedrail and grabs Evan's hand. "Thank you so much." He says, picking his head up off the bedrail. "Thank you."

"It's no problem." Owen and I each shake his hand before we let ourselves out of the room. I don't realize how late it is until I go to sign off on Evan's chart.

"Woah it's almost 6:30." I blurt. The nurses give me a weird look and I blush a little. "I fell asleep in Meredith's room." I offer by way of explanation. "Lost track of time." Owen just nods with no judgment passed and we split paths from the nurses' station. I find myself back in Meredith's room with my pile of paperwork. She's sleeping so I spread out on the couch and begin to work. I don't get very far when my stomach begins to growl. I sigh and resign myself to the fact that I have to take a break. However the food gods are in my favor when Cristina enters the room and tosses me a packaged salad.

"Figured you'd be in here." That's all she says before dropping into the chair at the far side of Meredith's bed. An orderly comes by with a food tray for Meredith and leaves it on the rolling table that is positioned over Meredith's bed. Cristina and I work in silence until Meredith begins to stir. I put the chart I'm working on aside and move to sit on the edge of Meredith's bed.

"Hi" She mumbles and I give her a few minutes to get all her faculties back in order.

"They delivered your dinner." Meredith gave the tray a disgusted look but I pulled it towards her anyway.

 _Just try it._ I pleaded with my eyes. She sighed but picked up the plastic fork and poked at what I think is meatloaf. There's also some pale broccoli, a pile of almost unnaturally white mashed potatoes, a fruit cup and some lime Jello. Meredith picks at the mashed potatoes and the broccoli and eats all of the fruit cup. She tries for the meatloaf but she puts one bite in her mouth and grimaces in disgust before she fights to swallow it. She does the same thing with the Jello but she can't swallow it and ends up spitting the remaining green chunks into a napkin.

"Jesus I thought Izzie was exaggerating." Meredith still has the disgusted look on her face. Cristina smirks at her.

"I'll get you some strawberry Jello tomorrow." I promise. I notice both Meredith and Cristina's expressions drop.

"The Mercy Westers show up tomorrow." Cristina mutters eerily. A hush falls over the room and Meredith and Cristina both have stormy expressions on their faces.

"You guys are fine." I reassure them. "Chief's desperate to keep Hunt and me around and he knows if he cuts you guys, we go too." That seems to lighten the gloom a little, but neither of them says anything.

It's not much later before Meredith is practically falling asleep sitting up. I help her lay back down. Cristina already declares she'll be conking out in the uncomfortable hospital chair. I get it but I still feel bad for her vertebra. I clean up my mess on the couch before I change into my pajamas.

"Goodnight Meredith." I peck her forehead. "I love you." She mumbles in her sleep and resettles.

* * *

 **AN: Hello valued reader! I hope you enjoyed the calm before the storm. If you've enjoyed the chapter leave a review. If you haven't enjoyed the chapter leave a review, it helps me become a better writer. Are you ready for the Mercy Westers? I hope so because their coming next Friday weather you like it or not!**


	5. Day 4

**Day 4**

My pager blares at 4 in the morning and I'm surprised to find that Izzie, Alex and Lexie have all crashed in Meredith's room. Lexie is in the spare chair and Alex and Izzie are curled up on a cot that I assume a nurse brought in.

My pager reads 911 to Evan's room again and I panic. He can't be waking up because that already happened. I throw the blankets off and quickly but quietly make my way out of the room. I sprint through the empty halls of the hospital to the PICU. When I get there Evan is seizing and the room is chaos. Mr. Walters is in the corner watching with fascinated horror as Owen calls out orders and the nurses keep Evan on his side.

"What happened?" I ask Owen as I fight my way through the chaos to the bed.

"He just started seizing." Owen offers helplessly.

"We have to open him back up." I decide. "Call up for an OR and give fill him up on Lorazepam and Pheno." I pull up the bedrails and we begin to move out of the room.

"OR 4 is open." A nurse calls out.

"This day already blows and the sun isn't even up yet." I mumble. Owen snorts in agreement.

* * *

I watch through the scrub room window as a team of nurses wheel the gurney holding Evan off to recovery. Poor kid had two new bleeds and some massive contusions forcing me to leave part of the skull cap off. The door slides open which breaks me from my trance and Owen sidles up behind me.

"We missed the Mercy Westers orientation." He points out.

"It's a shame." I say sarcastically.

"We should probably go down to the pit and hope people just learn our names as we go." I say. Owen nods and we head down to the pit. We find the ER in its usual chaos. Owen is whisked away amidst an emergency and I find that Lexie is assigned to my service along with a Mercy Wester by the name of Dr. Kepner. Our patient is a petty thief who was brought into the clinic after he was caught and beat up by the person he was attempting to rob. Despite wanting to hate her, Dr. Kepner has some good ideas about how to proceed with our patient. I have to bite my tongue though when she makes a rather passive aggressive remark about Lexie's memory.

"The redhead has a huge crush on you, you know that right?" Mark says as he appears behind me at the nurses' station where I'm filling out charts. "She follows you around like a puppy looking for praise."

"Yeah its times like these when I wish I could talk Meredith into wearing wedding rings." I remark

"Doesn't the marriage have to be cemented by more than some adhesive on the back of a small paper square for rings though?" Mark pokes.

"Shut up." I grumble and begin to walk away from him.

"All in good fun man." He says catching up to me and clapping me on the back. We head towards the elevators and wait when Dr. Kepner rushes up.

"Dr. Shepherd, I've gotten our patient admitted and I have all his labs and updated scans here for you." She says with an overly chipper voice and a very toothy smile.

"Thank you Dr. Kepner." I say politely but coolly.

"You're welcome." She laughs nervously and twirls her hair nervously. "If you need anything page me."

"Actually Dr. Kepner do you know where Dr. Grey is?" I ask as the elevator arrives and I step into the car.

"She said she had patients to check on. I was just on my way to find her." April says. The doors to the elevator slide closed and I breathe a sigh of relief as Mark snickers.

"Don't even go there." I warn. Mark holds his hands up in surrender.

"What do you want to bet Lexie's hiding in the basement?" Mark asks.

"She's not. I actually sent her to check on the kid from yesterday. He relapsed this morning" I confide in Mark. "I figured she'd need a break." Mark nods in understanding and the rest of the elevator ride is silent. I get off on the surgical recovery floor and make my way to Meredith's room. She's sitting up in bed and reading a trashy magazine.

"Hey" I smile as I enter the room and close the door behind me. I move to pull the blinds as Meredith's head snaps up.

"Have you talked to any of them?" She jumps right in.

"Talk to whom?" I play innocent as I sit on the side of her bed and take the magazine from her.

"The Mercy Westers." She whines.

"Yes" I say and I peck her gently on the lips. Meredith gives in for a second before she pushes on my upper arms to hold me back.

"No, I need to know what's going on out there." She scolds. "I need to know how my people are doing. I need to know how Cristina's doing. She's been dying for some cardio."

"I love you." I try to distract her as I kiss her again. Meredith lingers a second before she sighs loudly and pulls away.

"Please?" She begs a little bit.

"Mer you're supposed to be resting. You just had major surgery." I stall some more.

"But I can't." She whines. "My territory is being invaded and I'm stuck in bed and I can't do anything about it."

"Okay okay." I placate in attempts to calm her down. "They don't seem like complete idiots." I offer. That was the wrong thing to say because Meredith's expression looks even more worried. "Mer you have nothing to worry about." I say rubbing my hand up and down her arm.

"But what about my friends…and Lexie?" She genuinely looks scared.

"They're safe too." I reassure her. "Richard is on the final rounds of cuts and you'll see, they'll all be fine." Meredith bites her lip.

"Okay" She says softly.

"Okay." I agree.

"Do you have any surgeries today?" She attempts to change the subject.

"I'm working with Lexie. We have a guy who got caught robbing a house and was beaten up by the home owner. He has a broken neck." I divulge, while satisfying the surgery junkie in Meredith. "And the kid I was working on yesterday relapsed this morning."

"I'm sorry." She murmurs as she squeezes my hand.

"Yeah me too."

"Are you working with a Mercy Wester?" She asks.

I sigh at her inability to let this go. "Yeah her name is Dr. Kepner. She's alright but way to happy and kind of passive aggressive." I do my best to omit her comment about Lexie and the potential crush Dr. Kepner has on me.

"Have any of them fallen for you yet?" Meredith snickers.

"Well Dr. Kepner has a huge crush on me." I chuckle but Meredith's expression drops as she sits straight up.

"What!" She exclaims before she doubles over and hisses in pain.

"Easy Meredith." I warn as I put my hands on her shoulders and gently ease her back to a resting position. Her hand moves to rest atop her abdomen and she lets out a low painful moan.

"I was joking." She hisses.

"Relax Meredith you have nothing to worry about." I reassure her.

"No." She moans. "My territory has been invaded by surgery stealing, husband stealing, orange scrub wearing surgeons and I'm laid up in bed because my estranged father can't handle his grief." She pulls a pillow over her head and lets out a frustrated groan.

"Hey" I pry the pillow from her grasp. "The scrubs are ugly I'll give you that but as for the surgeries and the husband you'll be fine. You're an amazing surgeon and any program would be lucky to have you and I have it on good authority that the husband is madly in love with you not the annoying Mercy West resident who's crushing hard on him." The last part coaxes a small grin out of Meredith.

"You're safe Mer I promise." I cement that with a kiss.

"Okay." She yawns. I move to tuck her in when I notice a red spot on the sheets.

"Meredith, are you bleeding?" I pull the blankets back and find a small blood stain under her hip. I pull her gown up and find the bandage over her incision soaked with blood.

"Oh my god." I say. Meredith picks her head up and looks at the incision.

"Woah." Her eyes are fixated on the bandage. "I think I ripped a stitch or two sitting up too fast." I look at her incredulously; I'm surprised by how nonchalant she's being about this.

"I'm paging Bailey." I announce as I rip my pager from my waist. Meredith just nods and lies back down. Once the page is sent I stand up and pace anxiously.

"Derek, relax." Meredith orders. "I feel fine. I probably just ripped a few stitches." I want to argue but the door swings open and Dr. Bailey marches in.

"What is so damn important that you paged me away from my first real break since yesterday Dr. Shepherd?" Bailey demands.

"She's bleeding." I say pointing to Meredith. I feel like a little kid tattling under Bailey's glare. Bailey's eyes turn to Meredith and her gaze softens from annoyance to concern. She dons a pair of gloves and steps up to Meredith's bedside and gently peels back Meredith's soiled bandage. She pokes around a bit which makes Meredith wince. I take her hand and she squeezes. In the meantime Bailey calls for a nurse. Jeanie, Meredith's nurse, appears in the doorway.

"Jeanie, Dr. Grey here appears to have ripped a few stitches. Can you get me a suture kit, some lido, gauze and a new bandage please?" Jeanie nods and disappears and Meredith turns to me.

"Told you so." She smirks at me. Bailey turns her attention to Meredith.

"Now Grey, how did you manage to rip your stitches?" Bailey's tone is scolding.

"I sat up too fast." Meredith's tone is neutral. Bailey purses her lips glares at Meredith but she doesn't say anything else. Jeanie returns with a bunch of supplies on a small rolling table. Bailey gets to work prepping the needle for the local anesthetic.

"Small pinch." She warns Meredith but it's me who winces. Meredith squeezes my hand but other than that she remains unfazed. Bailey works quickly and methodically; in no time she's replacing Meredith's bandage. Jeanie begins cleaning up as Bailey snaps off her gloves.

"Relax Shepherd I didn't maim your wife." Bailey jokes dryly.

"Thank you Dr. Bailey." Meredith says as she resettles in her bed. Bailey glares at her.

"Grey you just had major surgery; you need to be resting not doing the nasty with your husband or worrying about what's going on out there." Bailey says waving towards the hallway. I can feel myself blushing.

"We weren't…I mean…there was no…." I stutter as my cheeks burn. Meredith is equally as red but she manages to keep her mouth shut. I almost sigh in relief when my pager goes off.

"My OR is ready." I tell Meredith. I give her a kiss on the forehead and let myself out of her room.

* * *

I scrub out after a successful surgery. I send Dr. Kepner to oversee the patient's recovery and I send Lexie to round on the rest of my patients. Dr. Kepner definitely seemed less bubbly during surgery and Lexie had her guilty face on, but I'm too tired to try and figure out what happened. I make my way to the nurses' station and collect the necessary paperwork for the day before heading to Meredith's room. When I get there I find Cristina in Meredith's bed stretched out at her side. Alex is in a visitor chair with his elbows on his knees, head in his hands. All of them have somber expression. Meredith looks up and catches my eye.

"Izzie left. She got cut." Those little words hang in the dour mood of the room.

"Oh" I feel dumb standing in the doorway of the room with nothing intelligent to say. Luckily I don't have to come up with anything because Alex stands up and storms out of the room.

"Can you…?" Meredith motions in Alex's direction.

"On it." Cristina jumps up and follows Alex out of the room. Meredith winces as she shifts and resettles. I move further into the room and sit on the edge of Meredith's bed.

"You said all my friends are safe." Meredith has a hurt expression on her face and I feel a stab of guilt.

"I know I'm sorry." I sigh.

"It's not your fault. I'm sorry I shouldn't take this out on you I just…we're down to three." She looks away and swipes her hand over her eyes. I take her free hand and give it a gentle squeeze. Meredith sniffles and I wrap my other arm around her shoulders. Meredith leans her forehead forward onto my shoulder and cries. Her soft, dainty little hiccups fill the room for a few moments until they quiet back to sniffles and she sits back.

"Thank you." She says softly and it reminds me of not too long ago when I had found her in a supply closet in hysterics.

"You're welcome." I say brushing her bangs out of her face. "I think I have something that will make it better." I say as I stand up. "I'll be right back." I make a mad dash to my office where I've stashed a bunch of stuff for Meredith that I had Mark pick up for me on his break. In my mini fridge I find what I'm looking for and I race back to Meredith's room with my surprise in hand.

"Strawberry Jello." Her face lights up with pure happiness.

"I have a whole stash of it in the fridge in my office." I tell her with a proud smile. She beams as she digs her plastic spoon into it and takes her first bite.

"Mmm" She moans. "I love you." She beams up at me.

"I love you too."

* * *

 **AN: I really REALLY like this chapter. Also I'm sorry. A lot of you seemed to get really attached to Evan. Unfortunately I wrote this like a month ago and he ties into the story line a little so it has to stay like that. Also someone asked for no Gary Clark. This story isn't going to go that far so you can all take a deep breath and live in your happy delusions of peace. Thanks for reading and don't forget to drop a review on the way out.**


	6. Day 5

**Day 5**

I sit sprawled on the couch in Meredith's room. I only have two surgeries today and they're both in the afternoon. I thank the trauma gods that the ER has been quiet and I'm able to sit in Meredith's room. Surprisingly, it's almost ten in the morning and Meredith is still asleep. It's normal for post-op patients to sleep a lot but that doesn't stop me from worrying simply because this is out of routine for Meredith.

I sigh and glance out the window. Yesterday had been Mercy West orientation day so practically every doctor had been on duty and paired with a Seattle Grace doctor. Now though, HR is trying to move everyone to normal shifts so only half of the Mercy Westers are on today; it's nice that the orange scrubs have been downgraded to a minor disturbance from a glaring monstrosity. I turn back to my work but shortly after I'm interrupted by Jeanie coming by and doing her rounds.

"She's still asleep?" She asks disbelievingly.

"Yep" I say as I look up from my work. Jeanie makes a small hmpf sound but she doesn't say anything else. She checks Meredith's vitals before writing everything down in a chart and leaving. I go back to my work but I am disrupted again by Meredith stirring. I stand and inch closer to the bed so I don't startle her. Her eyes crack open slightly but before I can even say anything she leans forward and vomits into her own lap.

"Woah" I say as I rush up to the side of the bed. I cup her chin and wipe away the vomit that's dribbling from her lip. Meredith is still in a bit of a dazed, half-awake, shock.

"Meredith are you okay?" I ask but all I get is a sputtering cough. I reach over and press the call button for the nurse; Jeanie appears in the doorway a moment later.

"What happened here?" Jeanie asks surprised.

"She woke up then she threw up." I tell her. Jeanie disappears into the bathroom but quickly returns with a damp towel. She replaces my hand with the towel and begins to wipe away the chunks of vomit.

"Dr. Grey, do you feel alright?" Jeanie asks.

"Not really." Meredith mumbles. Jeanie nods and puts the towel down on the rolling table.

"Do you feel dizzy or just sick to your stomach?" Jeanie asks.

"Just sick." Meredith whispers. "And it hurts too."

"That's normal after abdominal surgery especially with all the medicine." Jeanie says empathetically. She then directs her gaze to me. "Why don't you help her get cleaned up while I clean up in here?" Jeanie suggests. I nod.

"Come on Mer." I say as I ease her out of bed. "Let's get you cleaned up." I help her into the bathroom. I put the lid on the toilet down and guide her to sit on it. I disconnect her IV before I untie the grimy hospital gown and help her pull it off. I grab a plastic bag and pull it over her forearm to protect the IV site.

"I'm just going to let you're bandage get wet and then we'll change it later." I tell her.

"Okay" She says softly.

"Can you stand or do you need to sit?" I ask.

She shrugs "Dunno"

"Sitting it is then." I pull the shower chair into the shower so it will be under the stream. I turn on the water and get it to a comfortable temperature before I help Meredith into the shower. Then I strip down and climb into the shower as well. The water pelts down on us and I let Meredith get herself in to a comfortable position before I grab some of her shampoo that I'd brought from home.

"Tip your head back." I instruct her gently as I lather shampoo through her thick blonde hair. She complies and closes her eyes. I wash out any remaining shampoo and vomit that may have gotten tangled in her hair before I repeat the process with conditioner. I grab a wash cloth and one of the hospital provided soap packets and begin to help Meredith wash off. She howls in pain when I try to wash off her abdomen.

"Sorry, sorry." I apologize as I pull my hand away quickly. "Does it really hurt that much?" She nods and sniffles.

"It's just like really bad cramps." She elaborates

"I'm sorry." It doesn't feel appropriate but it's all I have to offer

"S'not your fault." She mumbles tiredly

"I know but I'm sorry you hurt." I push a loose strand of wet hair away from her face. She doesn't reply. I quickly finish helping her wash up before turning off the water and wrapping Meredith in a towel. I guide her back over to the toilet and she sits down again while I grab another towel to dry her hair with. After she is completely dried off, I help her into a pair of sweatpants and a new hospital gown. I quickly throw the scrubs I had been wearing back on. I pull the plastic off her arm and reconnect the IV before we make our way out of the bathroom. Jeanie is waiting for us when we re-enter the hospital room. The sheets on the bed have been changed and the room smells of some sort of false flowery Ferbreeze to mask the stench of puke. Jeanie and I help Meredith back into bed and under the blankets. Jeanie positions a pillow under Meredith's hip, cushioning her incision, and sets the bed in a position so that Meredith is halfway between sitting up and lying down.

"Is that comfortable Dr. Grey?" Jeanie asks while giving the pillows one last fluff. Meredith nods and closes her eyes.

"Her bandage needs to be changed." I tell Jeanie.

She nods. "I've put a note in the chart for Dr. Bailey to come by later to talk about medication options for pain management as well as nausea. I'll let her change the bandage then too."

"Okay." I smile. "Thank you Jeanie." She nods and exits the room and I sit down beside Meredith. Her eyes are closed and her breathing is even. I can tell she's not asleep but I grab her hand and do my best not to disturb her so that she can fall asleep.

* * *

Unfortunately, the pain is so bad that Meredith can't get to sleep and she is still squirming uncomfortably in the bed when Bailey comes by half an hour later.

"I heard she's had a rough morning." Bailey says as she closes the door behind her.

"That's an understatement." I scoff. Bailey doesn't engage; instead she snaps on a pair of gloves and pulls back the layers of fabric at Meredith's side in order to reveal her abdomen. She begins to peel off Meredith's bandage which in turn causes Meredith to writher in pain.

"It's okay." I try to comfort her. "You're okay; Bailey's just changing your bandage." I gently place my hand on the side of her head and run my fingers through her hair. I keep mumbling nonsense to keep her calm and distracted while Bailey does her thing. Meredith's eyes water and she's breathing heavy but she stays still until Bailey begins to palpate her abdomen.

"Oww." She cries as she tries to turn away from Bailey's hands.

"Shh shh shh. I know; I know. It's okay." I reassure her. I cradle her head in my arms as her tears start coming full force. She grabs at my shirt and manages to cling to a fistful of my sleeve. Bailey finally pulls her hands away from Meredith's stomach and re-tucks the blanket around her.

"All done Grey." She places her hand on Meredith's shoulder and squeezes it gently. "I'm just going to take your temp and take some blood and I'll be on my way." Meredith nods and slowly uncurls herself from me.

"Do you think she has an infection?" I ask worriedly.

"No." Bailey says bluntly. "I think her body is having a hard time getting back on track. I'm going to prescribe some laxatives because I think she's constipated but I also like to be thorough." Bailey bustles around doing a few minor tests and writing the results in Meredith's chart. She asks Meredith a few questions but doesn't seem too worried by the answers. She leaves momentarily and she returns with a syringe of what I assume is the laxative.

"Alright I'll be back in few hours to check on you Grey. I know it might be difficult but try and get some sleep." Bailey nods.

"Dr. Bailey if you see Little Grey or Yang can you send them in please?" I ask before she can leave the room.

"I'll do my best." She smiles and exits the room so that it's just Meredith and I. Meredith is propped up on her side by a bounty of pillows and she's staring off into space with her gaze directed at the ceiling.

"Are you comfortable like that or do you need to move?" I ask toying with the damp, loose strands of her hair.

"No" She says absently. We sit in silence while I twist strands of her hair around my fingers absently and she stares off into abstract nothingness. Eventually her eyes fall closed and she rests in a light doze. My heart hurts for her because I can tell she's in pain and sleep would be a welcome reprieve but she just can't sleep. I want to pick her up and take her to a place far from here where she feels no pain.

I jump a little when I hear the door open quietly. The motion is enough to startle Meredith and her eyes crack open.

"Shh go back to sleep." I say softly before I turn to confront the offending person. Lexie is standing by the door with a deer caught in the headlights sort of look on her face.

"Hey" She breathes. "Bailey said you were looking for me." She creeps closer to me careful not to disturb Meredith.

"Yeah, I have a surgery today that I absolutely cannot push but Mer's having a bad day and I don't want to leave her by herself." I explain.

"Oh yeah totally." Lexie nods enthusiastically. "I'm on cardio so there's not much to do anyway."

"Thanks Lex." I smile. "The surgery isn't until 1:30 so you can finish up whatever. It's an aneurysm clipping so it shouldn't be that long."

"Okay so I'll be back in like half an hour?" I glance at my watch; to my surprise it's lunchtime.

"Yeah I guess you will be." I say a little miffed as to where all the time went. Lexie smiles again before she lets herself out of the room. I turn back to Meredith who still has her eyes closed and is breathing deeply.

"I love you." I tell her softly. "I love you and I'm sorry you're hurting." I place a light kiss on her forehead. She tightens her grip on my hand and moans softly in response.

* * *

I wipe my damp hands off on my scrubs as I set course to the surgical waiting area. The surgery went flawlessly and now all that's left is to inform the husband. I glance at the OR board on the way past and see the Dr. Weller is in OR 4 performing the surgery I had handed off to him earlier. I make it to the waiting room and find the husband of my patient easily and fill him in. I'm thankful that he doesn't really have a lot of questions. I send him off with a nurse to see his wife before I make a beeline to Meredith's room.

The sight I find there stops me in my tracks

Lexie is sitting in a chair pushed up as close to the bed as possible. A pile of charts lay forgotten on the floor by the back leg of the chair. Lexie is holding Meredith's hand with her right and her left hand is rubbing Meredith's arm shoulder to elbow. Meredith is propped up on a mountain of pillows so that she is sort of tipped up on her left side. I can't see either of their faces but I can hear Lexie whispering softly to Meredith. I want to back out of the room but Lexie's pager blares startling everyone in the room. Lexie jumps up and grabs her stack of charts before turning around. She gives me a surprised look but doesn't say anything as she rushes past me. Meredith lifts her head off the pillow and looks at me; she gives a weak smile before she drops her head back on the pillow and closes her eyes. I take the seat Lexie had been sitting in. I grab Meredith's hand in my own and pet her knuckles with my thumb.

"Hey" I whisper tentatively.

"Hi" She sounds exhausted

"How're you feeling?" I run my thumb across her cheek bone.

"A little better. Stuff's…moving," Her hand subconsciously moves to her lower abdomen, "but I don't really have any urge to do something about it." Her eyes dip closed.

"Have you been able to sleep at all?'

"Not really." She says softly with frustration laced through her tone. I don't say anything in response. Instead I splay my palm across her back and rub in slow soothing motions. Her eyes dip closed in what is a little longer than a blink. Her eyelids drop again and this time they stay closed. Her breaths come soft and even. She rests quietly. That is until she gasps and then whimpers in discomfort.

"What? What is it?" I rush to be of any comfort.

"I need…" She pants as she sits up. "…to get…I have to…" She pushes aside the tangles of blankets and grabs at the IV pole. I catch on as she begins to drag herself to the bathroom. I open the door for her and once she's in the bathroom I shut the door and sit on the couch to wait. It's not long before I hear the toilet flush and water running. I stand and shift anxiously from foot to foot. Meredith comes out slowly but she looks relieved.

"Better?" I ask.

"Yeah." She nods. "My stomach still hurts a little but the pressure and the cramping are gone." I guide her back to bed. She practically sinks into the bed. I pull the blanket over her and tuck it in. Before I can even say anything she's already asleep.

* * *

I rush back to Meredith's room as quick as I can with my arms full. It's a challenge but I make it and I'm pleased to see Meredith is still asleep. I drop my bounty on the couch and sigh in relief as I set up. Meredith can sleep through bombs but I'm still quiet anyway as I tiptoe around the room. Meredith doesn't stir at all. With one final once over of my work I give a satisfactory nod and move to stand at Meredith's head.

"Meredith." I whisper while running my fingers through her hair. "Mer wake up." I press a gentle kiss to her forehead.

"Whatimesit." She mumbles groggily.

"Almost 7 o'clock." I'm a little doubtful now. She's tired and probably still isn't feeling all that great but it's too late to turn back now.

She rubs her eyes groggily and blinks several times before she can focus on something.

"Sandwiches!" She blurts looking at the rolling table I positioned at the end of the bed.

"Yeah I got them from the deli down the street. I figured you had a crappy day and you didn't need it to end with crappy hospital food." I pull the tray table closer. "I also picked up some strawberry ice cream and apple juice." At this point Meredith is beaming. She picks up her chicken BLT and takes a huge bite.

"Mmmm I love you so much." She moans.

"Me or the sandwich?" I joke.

"You, doofus." She shoves me playfully.

"I love you too Mer." I say as I take a bite of my own sandwich.

* * *

 **AN: Yes I just wrote a whole chapter about how Meredith has to poop because I am the epitome of mature. I like this chapter. I'm especially a fan of the Lexie and Meredith part. I will build on that relationship I promise. But for now I appreciate you reading and I hope you'll leave a review. ;)**


	7. Day 6

**Day 6**

I sigh as I make my way to the coffee cart. Today has been a rough day and it's barely after 9 AM. My day started at 3:30 this morning by a page to the ER. Some drunk had gotten behind the wheel and rammed his car into an innocent police officer. The police officer had been my patient and was in really tough shape. However after two hours in surgery things were looking up until it all came crashing down with the steady rhythm of asystole. Her poor husband's day had started with finding out his wife was dead. Then there was the case of Evan Walters, the poor boy who was brutally beaten by his step-father and had yet to wake up from his second life saving brain surgery. It had been forty-eight hours and there had been no sign of consciousness. He's capable of gaining consciousness he just isn't.

At least there's no line at the coffee cart.

I grab my cup of coffee and head back up to the surgical wing. My day is routine but busy. I have two shunt surgeries and a craniotomy with a few consults in between. To make matters worse I have to work with a Mercy West resident I haven't met before today. I lean up against the nurses' station while I wait for him or her to arrive and review my charts for today.

"Dr. Shepherd?" A tentative voice interrupts my thoughts

"Hmmm?" I look up from my charts to see a relatively tall resident with buzz cut brown hair looking back at me.

"I'm Dr. Avery, your resident for the day." He sticks out his hand confidently. I shake it before I reach over for the stack of charts.

"3207 needs to be prepped for a shunt placement. 4024 needs an MRI; page me with the results. 3405 and 2289 need to be monitored; page me if anything changes with them." I dump the charts into Avery's arms. "If you'll excuse me I have a consult." I turn on my heel and walk towards the pit.

* * *

My consult goes flawlessly and before I know it I'm standing side by side with Dr. Avery placing a shunt inside a little girl's brain. Avery seems like a pretty competent guy, only asking the occasional well thought out questions and following commands with ease. It's his intern who I have a problem with. She's the girly bubbly type who keeps flirting shamelessly with me even though I haven't even bothered to learn her name. She's standing way to close to me and asking rather obvious questions every other minute.

I really wish I could talk Meredith into that ring.

Lucky for me though, it's a smooth procedure that goes by quickly enough.

"Thank you everyone." I address the entire OR. "Dr. Avery if you could close please and have your intern follow the patient to recovery." I do one final check before I step back from the table and head to the scrub room. I sigh as begin to scrub out. The clock on the wall tells me that I have forty-five minutes until my consult which means I have time to swing by Meredith's room and check on her. She's been a lot better since yesterday but that doesn't mean I don't worry. I leave the scrub room and navigate quickly to Meredith's room. I swing the door open but immediately jump so it won't slam into the wall behind it. Meredith is sleeping soundly, her body tipped on to her right side. It appears to be the position she finds most comfortable. One of her hands is curled in a fist and propped under her chin while the other has a loose hold on the disheveled blanket covering her. I creep forward determined not to wake her but also to get a good look at her. Her hair is unruly mess strewn across her face. I reach out and gently brush it away from her face. She snuffles softly in her sleep but quickly resettles. Not wanting to disturb her further I move to press a feather light kiss to her forehead before I turn to leave. But before I actually leave something catches on to the side of my scrub shirt.

"Shh it's just me. Go back to sleep." I murmur to Meredith who now has a fistful of my top clutched in her unconscious grasp.

She mumbles something incoherent although it sounds a lot like "Love you."

"I love you too." I whisper before stealthily tiptoeing out of the room.

* * *

My day keeps going by in a whirlwind. I do two more consults, another shunt placement surgery and evaluate a few traumas in the pit from a multi-car pileup on the freeway. Before I know it, it's two o'clock and my stomach is grumbling for food. I grab a rather unappealing sandwich from the display and pay before I pick up a bundle of paperwork and head up to Meredith's room. She's awake this time and reading a book that I haven't seen before.

"Hey" I give her a peck on the cheek. "How're you?"

"Bored" She replies dully as she drops her book on the rolling table in front of her. "Can you sneak me up to the gallery for one of your surgeries?" She pouts at me.

"Well I'd try but I think the IV pole would be hard to disguise." I point out. Meredith scowls at the offending object.

"Did you eat already?" I try to change the subject.

"Yeah" Meredith says. "Lexie came by and ate with me. She also got me this terrible book but it's better than daytime TV." I nod as I begin to chew my sandwich.

"How's Thatcher?" I broach the subject cautiously but Meredith doesn't seem fazed at all.

"He's fine. All his labs are good and there are no signs of rejection. He's getting discharged the day after I am." She says it like it's any other patient and not the estranged father she just gave half her liver to.

"That's good." I cock my head and look at her in attempts to decipher her thoughts.

"What?" She asks staring right back at me.

"Nothing it's just… you seem very calm about all of this." She shrugs

"He's not my father. Just because I gave him half my liver doesn't magically erase what he did to me. It's a band-aid over a bullet hole." Her thought process makes sense but at the same time it's still so weird how calm she is about all of this.

"Okay." I don't know what else to say.

"Are you sure you can't sneak me into a surgery?" She pouts.

"I'm sure." I say. "But I should be done with my day around seven so we can go for a romantic walk down the hall, then go get a gourmet meal at the cafeteria; does that sound good?"

"It's a date." She nods. I lean in to kiss her. Our conversation turns to me and my day. Our lunch is adjourned by my pager blaring.

"I have to take this." I apologize as I pull my pager from my waistband. Meredith nods in understanding and flops back on the pillow.

"Okay, see you later." She says closing her eyes

"Love you." I call out over my shoulder.

I hear a faint "Love you too" call out behind me.

* * *

I swear to God I'm going to kill this intern. I'm standing in surgery with Dr. Avery; it's my finally surgery of the day, a simple craniotomy, and this intern is acting like it's a hemispherectemy. Dr. Avery stands beside me quietly assisting and adding input every once in a while. I almost want to snap at him to control his intern but really it's not his fault.

"Dr. Shepherd?" I almost cringe as she pipes up again. "What got you into neurosurgery in the first place?" I roll my eyes. It's hardly the time or place for such a question. However, before I can formulate an appropriate response, one of the scrub nurses speaks up.

"Dr. Shepherd how's your wife doing?" I thank the lord for Charlene the scrub nurse in that moment.

"She's doing well. The surgery went great and the doctor is happy with her recovery." I smile just at the thought of Meredith. I feel Dr. Avery smirking beside me and out of the corner of my eye I can see the intern is beet red. I smirk in slight satisfaction. The rest of the surgery goes smoothly and without any further interruption from the intern. As I head to the scrub room I thank my OR staff and make sure to make eye contact with Charlene.

* * *

The rest of my day is spent checking up on patients and doing the boring menial stuff that comes along with being a doctor. I feel satisfied though when I make it to Meredith's room at 7 o'clock sharp. She's still sitting up in bed reading the book from earlier although it appears she's almost finished it.

"Hey" I knock on the open door.

"Hey" She drops her book and smiles at me.

"You ready to go eat?" I ask.

"Yes" She grins. She swings her legs over the side of the bed and reaches for the IV pole.

"Good, I have a chariot awaiting you at the end of the hall." I say with a terrible mock British accent. She snorts and rolls her eyes. She stands and we shuffle slowly out of the room and down the hall. We make it to the wheelchair I had specifically parked there for her. I help her sit in the wheelchair before we're off to the cafeteria.

"How was the rest of your day?" She asks as I wheel her onto the elevator.

"It was okay. My last surgery went smoothly aside from the intern shamelessly flirting with me." Meredith tenses a little bit before she relaxes and smirks. "A scrub nurse came to my rescue though." I begin to recount the story to Meredith but she cuts me off halfway through.

"Wait so people know we're married?" She sounds a little panicked.

"No no no," I'm quick to squash her worries. "People know I'm married they just don't know I'm married to you." The doors open and I begin heading to the cafeteria. Meredith relaxes a little bit and I finish the story of how Charlene the scrub nurse came to my rescue. When we finally arrive at the cafeteria it's mostly empty with the exception of a few orderlies sitting at one of the tables in the corner. I pick a table in the corner opposite the orderlies and park Meredith there.

"I shall return with food." I declare before kissing her on the cheek and turning to get in the cafeteria line. I grab a turkey sandwich with yogurt for myself and a hamburger and fries for Meredith. I grab drinks for both of us and pay the bored looking cafeteria lady. When I turn and head back to the table I can see Meredith is bent over with her head resting on her arms. I gently set the tray down as to not startle her but she still sits straight up anyways.

"You okay?" I place my hand on her shoulder. She nods and brushes her bangs out of her face before she grabs her plate and begins to chow down. We eat in silence for a few minutes while Meredith inhales her burger. We talk about mindless things like her friends and my cases but it's nice because it's simple and easy. It's nice to have a meal together outside of Meredith's hospital room. Eventually though we've eaten all our food and Meredith is getting tired despite how hard she tries to fight it.

"Are you ready to go back?" It's a question with an obvious answer but she nods anyway. I throw away our garbage before taking the handles of Meredith's wheelchair and steering her towards the elevator. We make it up to the surgical floor in silence but when the doors slide open I cringe when I see who's on the other side.

"Dr. Shepherd" April Kepner perks up from her position at the nurses' station. "There's a head trauma in the pit that needs a consult." She gives me a toothy smile.

"I'm off duty. Dr. Weller is the attending on call, page him." I don't slow down to chat and Dr. Kepner races after us.

"But Dr. Weller is surgery and since you already here…" She trails off when I don't acknowledge her.

"Page Dr. Krycheck. He's the senior resident. I'm sure this is well within his capabilities."

She doesn't relent. "I can take your patient back to her room if you want to go down now." I grip the handlebars to the point where my knuckles turn white. I stop moving and turn to face Dr. Kepner.

"I. Am. Off. Duty. Page Dr. Krycheck." I order her. Dr. Kepner recoils and her face goes pale. "This _patient_ is my wife. If you'll excuse us I'd like to get back to her room." I turn on my heel and begin wheeling Meredith down the hall again, leaving a stricken Dr. Kepner behind. Meredith doesn't say anything on the short journey back to her room but once the door clicks shut she bursts out laughing.

"Oh my God…you ripped into her…she looked like…like she was gonna cry." Meredith is doubled over laughing and I watch with quiet amusement. "I can't believe I was worried about my spot in the program." Meredith says once she's calmed down some. "That one was not very bright."

"Told you so." I smile as I help her from the wheelchair to the bed. She practically molds into the bed.

"I'm so tired." She whispers.

"I know." I tuck her in.

"I love you." She mumbles sleepily.

"I love you too."

* * *

 **AN: I don't really have any commentary on this chapter. It's filler and it's kind of cute but it isn't anything special. However I do hope you'll leave a review and tell me what you thought. Thanks for reading. I'll see you next week!**


	8. Day 7

**Day 7**

"I definitely feel comfortable letting you go home tomorrow." Bailey says as she examines Meredith's incision. Meredith grins at me and I give her an equally big smile.

"I assume you'll stay with her McDreamy." Bailey directs her gaze to me.

"I have the first couple of days off and I've picked up a lighter rotation so I should be able to be around more." Bailey nods with satisfaction.

"Good. I'm going to take out these stitches and I'll have Jeanie disconnect the IV." Bailey's gloved hands work methodically over Meredith's abdomen. Meredith stares intently at me with a million dollar smile on her face.

"I get to go home." She sounds giddy.

"I know. I'm happy for you." I can feel an equally big smile spread across my face. She winces a little as Bailey snips a stitch.

"Did that hurt?" My mood goes from happy to concern. Bailey looks up at Meredith sternly.

"It shouldn't hurt Grey."

"No it just…pulled." Meredith stammers. "Honest, it doesn't hurt it's just uncomfortable." Bailey doesn't say anything and goes back to snipping stitches with a look of indifference. Before I can express my worry Meredith squeezes my hand and that makes me relax. Bailey straightens up and wipes Meredith's incision with an alcohol wipe before reapplying a bandage.

"Alright Grey. I'll send Jeanie in to take you off the IV. You've been taking oral meds already though so it really won't make a difference. I'll keep you overnight tonight because that's standard procedure but tomorrow night I'll discharge you." Bailey cleans up her supplies and leaves the room.

"Are you ready to go home?" I know it's an obvious question but I like the smile she wears whenever she thinks about it.

"Yeah." She looks at me with a 'duh' expression.

"That's good. I'm excited to have you home."

"Oh please, you've been home a grand total of 90 minutes since my surgery." She mocks a playful shove. I'm about to protest when my pager goes off.

"Crap it's the Walters kid. I have to take it." I stand and clip my pager to my belt.

I give Meredith a quick kiss and I hear her call out "Good luck" behind me.

* * *

"I'm sorry Mr. Walters but there's nothing more we can do. It's been 72 hours; his chances of waking up now are non-existent." I feel sorry for the man in front of me. He's crying and clinging to his lifeless child's hand.

"But..but he was awake…before, he was awake." He sniffles loudly.

"I know." I have nothing better to say and to be honest I have no idea why the kid woke up the first time. "I'm sorry."

"Wha…what now?" He wipes his eyes.

"Well, you can keep him on life support. We'd transfer him to a long term care facility and you could hope for the best. Or you can take him off life support."

"And let him die." Mr. Walters tone is broken. I don't say anything. There's never a good thing to say in these situations.

"Can I have some time? To think about it?"

"Of course." I nod and flip the chart closed. As I leave the room I hear Mr. Walters break down in sobs once more. Owen is leaning up against the nurses' station watching me as I walk over to deposit the chart. I let out a heavy sigh and slump against the nurses' station.

"It never gets easier." Owen says as we watch Mr. Walters.

"It's never fair either." I mutter. We turn away from the room and begin to trek down the hall. At an intersection, Mark joins our merry bunch.

"Why the long faces?" Mark ribs.

"Our seven year old patient who was beaten by his step-father didn't make it." I say glumly.

"Damn" Mark says. "That sucks."

"Yeah" Owen and I breathe out simultaneously.

"You guys want to grab lunch?" Mark offers. "I'll buy."

"Sure" Owen says.

"I guess." I say.

"You don't sound so sure." Mark looks at me.

"Nah I was just thinking about Meredith." I say. "She'll be fine."

"No man, why don't you go grab her?" Mark suggests. "I'm sure Little Grey is somewhere around here. She could join us too."

"You totally just got laid didn't you?" Owen asks as we make our way to the cafeteria. Mark blushes and doesn't say anything to the contrary.

"I'll meet you guys there." I say as I turn to head to Meredith's room.

* * *

"Hey." I smile at Meredith as I walk into her room.

"Hey." She says dully. She doesn't appear to be doing anything but staring at the bland wall in front of her. Any trace of her good mood from earlier is gone

"You okay?" I come to stand beside her bed.

"I'm so boooored." She moans.

"Well then you're in luck. We're going to lunch." I tell her. She perks up at the idea immediately.

"Really?" She throws the blanket back and swings her legs over the side.

"Yep, it'll be you, me, Owen, Mark and probably Lexie." I help her stand and we head out into the hall.

"Poor Owen might get lonely." Meredith jokes.

"Well it's okay because you and I can't have sex and Lexie and Mark did it like not even 15 minutes ago." I laugh as her smile morphs into a look of disgust.

"Eww that's my little sister and your best friend. I don't want to think about that." I laugh heartily as I help her into a wheelchair.

"I don't really want to think about it either." I say.

"Well than why did you say it?" She turns to look at me but immediately winces and turns around and cradles her stomach.

"Are you okay?" I squeeze her shoulder.

"Yeah, I'm just really sore." I don't say anything but instead opt to massage her shoulders as we wait for an elevator.

"You know the kid who was beaten by his step-dad?" I ask quietly.

"Yeah?" Meredith sounds apprehensive and hopeful at the same time.

"He didn't wake up." I say glumly. I feel her shoulders slouch beneath my grasp.

"I'm sorry." She whispers.

"Yeah me too." We travel the rest of the way to the cafeteria in a depressed silence.

When we get there, we find all our friends waiting for us at one of the outdoor tables. I wheel Meredith to the end of the table and sit on the bench beside her. Alex and Callie also appear to be joining us, sitting alongside Owen. Mark and Lexie appear with trays of food and divvy everything up. Everyone digs in and we begin to discuss surgeries. Callie talks about a knee replacement with Owen, Mark and I. Owen and I grieve for our young patient while Mark celebrates a successful facial reconstruction. Alex and Lexie discuss their patients amongst themselves and Meredith focuses on her food instead of the conversations going on around her but I read a look of jealousy on her face.

"How about you Mer? How's bed rest going?" Alex pokes. I can tell instantly that Karev struck a nerve. Meredith looks up from her sandwich and gives him a falsely sweet smile.

"Just great thanks for asking. Me and my reality shows are getting on just fine." She sneers at him then goes back to her lunch. Everyone chuckles but Meredith doesn't acknowledge it.

"How's your dad Lexie?" Meredith changes the subject.

"Oh…um…" Meredith's question clearly throws Lexie off guard. "He's good. No signs of rejection or other complications. He's antsy to get home though." Meredith doesn't say anything; instead, she picks at her french fries. The table descends into an awkward silence as everyone goes back to their food. My hand finds Meredith's knee under the table and I squeeze gently. If she notices the gesture she doesn't let on.

"Do either of you want in on a nerve reconstruction this afternoon." Mark asks Alex and Lexie. I feel Meredith tense under my grasp and her face morphs into a look of longing. Alex and Lexie jump on the offer and Meredith looks on with a wistful frown.

She makes a show of yawning before asking "I'm tired, can we go back to the room?" I nod before I stand to clear our trays. I come back and take the brakes off the chair; I wheel her away with a flurry of goodbyes calling after us. Meredith is quiet all the way back to the room and when we finally arrive she's quick to clamber into her bed and close her eyes. I want to prod her to talk but she doesn't say anything and I don't have enough time to drag it out of her.

"I have a surgery but I'll see you later." She doesn't say anything. "I love you."

She mumbles "You too."

* * *

I'm out of surgery and taking a coffee break before my next consult when Cristina stops me in the hall.

"What did you do?" She demands.

"What do you mean?" I feel confused.

"To Meredith, what did you do to Meredith? She's all pissed off and moody." Cristina looks pretty pissed off and moody herself but I don't vocalize that thought.

"Oh, that wasn't me. Take it up with Karev. She's in cutting withdrawal and he poked the beast." At least I think that's what's wrong with Meredith but she is a very complicated woman.

"Figures" Cristina grumbles before she stomps off without even a goodbye. As I head to the coffee cart I begin to formulate a plan.

* * *

It's hours later when I'm heading back to Meredith's room. I'm armed with pizza, popcorn, Coke, ice cream and a little surprise that took a good forty-five minutes to find in the research library. When I arrive, Meredith's sitting up in bed reading some sort of trashy magazine. I can tell she's still in a sour mood by the scowl that's marring her features.

"Hey" I announce my presence and drop my goodies on the rolling table. Her look softens noticeably when she spots me and my gifts.

"Hi" She says, throwing her magazine onto the bedside table.

"I come with peace offerings." I gesture to the pile of stuff.

"I can see that." She looks at me to continue.

"I have pizza, popcorn, Coke, ice cream and a heart transplant." I watch her face light up as I point to each object respectively. Meredith opens the pizza box and I go pop the heart transplant tape in the DVD player beneath the TV. Meredith slides over in the bed and I climb in beside her. We watch the heart transplant while we eat our pizza. About halfway through we dig into the ice cream. When the heart transplant is over we are cuddle together in the bed, picking at the popcorn.

"Thank you for getting me a heart transplant." She whispers as she shifts so she is more on her side.

"You're very welcome." I kiss her.

"I'm sorry I was in such a bad mood earlier." She mumbles softly.

"It's okay; I understand." I run my hand up and down her back. She's quiet for a minute and I think she's fallen asleep.

"Can I tell you a secret?" She whispers like she has something to hide.

"Sure." I chuckle at the sly look that overcomes her face.

"Lexie snuck me into the gallery for Mark's nerve reconstruction." She has an ear to ear grin.

"She did?" How had I not heard of this?

"I think she felt bad. She just showed up with a pair of scrubs, a wheelchair and puppy dog eyes; she told me to get changed then she snuck me up there." Meredith shrugs like it's no big deal.

"How was it?" I ask.

"Nice, I got to feel like a doctor, sort of, for a few hours instead of a patient." She smiles but it quickly turns into a yawn.

"I'm glad it made you feel better." At this point it's in the past and arguing over it would be pointless. She doesn't say anything, instead she snuggles deeper into my arms.

"I love you." She mumbles sleepily.

"I love you too." I kiss the top of her head.

* * *

 **AN: I've been looking forward to this chapter. Pissed off Meredith is fun to write. Thanks for your support and reviews; please keep them coming. I'll see y'all next week with a new chapter!**


	9. Day 8

**Day 8**

Meredith is getting discharged today.

It's the first thought I have when I wake up this morning curled up in bed with her. Its 5:30 and I have to get up for rounds. I take a quick shower in Meredith's bathroom before I head to the surgical floor. It's a very quick and routine day so rounds are over by 7 o'clock. I grab some breakfast and catch up on paperwork in the cafeteria. Mark and Owen join me and we talk about menial things until the both of them are paged away. I purposely didn't schedule and surgeries today so I can take Meredith home at a decent hour barring any large emergencies.

It's an hour and a consult later when I make my way back to Meredith's room. I find her stretched out on the couch dressed in track pants and a t-shirt.

"Hey" I plop down beside her.

"Hey" She smiles at me before going back to the magazine that's in her lap.

"You changed." I comment.

"Yep. No IV." She holds up her hand as if to prove her point. It's still bruised and there's a band-aid covering the battle scar but there's no needle.

"Why are you lying on the couch instead of in the bed?" It does seem weird to me that her back is propped up by a pillow resting against the armrest with her legs stretched along the length of the couch instead of the bed less than ten feet away.

"My back is sore from lying down so much but it's uncomfortable to sit up for more than five minutes at a time." She shrugs like it's no big deal.

"I'm sorry." I murmur as I rub her thigh gently. "Can I help?"

"I don't know." Meredith shrugs again. "You could rub my back." I can tell she's just humoring me and she doesn't think anything will help but I'm willing to try. I get her to lean forward and I squeeze in behind her so that her back is to my chest. I dig the pads of my thumbs into her back, along her spine, and she moans.

"Am I hurting you?" I pull my hands away alarmed.

"No, keep going that feels amazing." She pushes into me as I press on different spots of tension that have accumulated over the past week. While I do this we talk. She asks about surgeries and I ask about the ins and outs of the latest celebrity gossip. It's nice until I'm called away by a resident regarding a patient.

"I'll see you later." I promise as I help her back to bed.

* * *

I sigh for the millionth time as I pace the width of the hallway outside of Thatcher Grey's hospital room. He's awake and sitting up and he appears to be talking to Lexie. I can see all that through the open door. Yet I can't bring myself to walk through it. I'm nervous to talk to my wife's father but not for the usual reasons. I pace the hall again and run my hand through my hair, aggravated. I take a deep breath, square my shoulders, and march into Thatcher's room. Both Lexie and Thatcher's heads snap up as I enter.

"Lexie, could Thatcher and I have a moment alone please?" I ask politely. Lexie jumps up quickly and nods.

"Oh yeah, sure, I uh, I have to go give blood anyway, because…there's a blood drive." Lexie stammers as she makes her way to the door. She leaves and closes the door behind her which leaves me standing at the foot of Thatcher's bed.

"H-How's Meredith?" Thatcher sounds nervous.

"You could go around the corner and ask her." My answer is harsh but I've lost my respect for the man before me. Thatcher doesn't appear to have a response so I continue. "She got the ball rolling. She gave you half her liver but she owes you absolutely nothing." I step a little closer to the bed. "It takes an amazing person to do that. **She** is an amazing person and you're lucky to even know her. She sacrificed a lot for you and you don't have a good track record of paying her back."

"I didn't mean to-"Thatcher tries to interject.

"But you did. And you have a chance here to know, to really know, that amazing woman down the hall. Don't blow it." I threaten.

"I don't intend to." Thatcher says quietly.

"Good." We appear to have come to some sort of silent agreement.

"What's she like?" Thatcher asks.

"You'll have to find out for yourself." I say softly, knowing Meredith probably wouldn't want me explaining the details of her life to her estranged father.

"Oh" Thatcher nods resigned, "okay." I'm trying to figure out how to escape the room when suddenly my pager goes off.

"Excuse me, I have to take this." I say as I read the pager screen.

* * *

The page is from an intern regarding one of my patients and it's an easy fix. I head down to the cafeteria and grab some lunch before finding myself a relatively secluded table to have a few minutes to myself. My mission is successful until Mark drops into the chair across from me with a cup of yogurt and an all knowing grin.

"You know when someone sits in a corner by themselves it's usually indication that they want to be left alone." I say dryly.

"But I want all the dirt on what you said to Thatcher." Mark whines sarcastically.

"Has that already hit the gossip mill?" I groan.

"No I just ran into Lexie at the blood drive. I didn't even say anything and she just gushed about how stupid she was to leave you alone with her father."

"I wasn't going to hurt the guy; I took an oath." I defend myself.

"Which brings me back to, what did you say to him?" Mark prods as he shovels a spoonful of yogurt into his mouth.

"I just told him he's lucky for a second chance and he shouldn't screw it up." I shrug and Mark nods in approval. We finish eating together in companionable silence.

* * *

"What did you do to Thatcher?" I'm met by Meredith's harsh glare as I enter her hospital room.

"Nothing." I hold my hands up in surrender.

"No you did something." Meredith accuses. "Lexie was in here and she was all rambling and pacing about how she never should have left him alone with you and how she should go check on you guys." She points her finger accusingly. "So, what did you do to him?"

"I didn't hurt him." I say defensively. "I just…warned him. So he doesn't hurt you again."

"I'm a big girl Derek. I can handle my father." She crosses her arms over her chest.

"But you shouldn't have to." I say softly, stepping closer to her to bed apprehensively. "Meredith, you didn't deserve the way he treated you; you still don't deserve it." Her face crumples a little and I move to sit on the edge of her bed. "You shouldn't have to worry about the next time he leaves." I put my hand on her cheek. "You deserve better Meredith." That causes her walls to fall down completely.

"Thank you." She whispers. I wrap my arms around her shoulders and she rests her forehead on my shoulder. It's nice to sit like that for a few minutes.

"How long until your next surgery?" Meredith asks.

"I don't have anything scheduled for today."

"Why not?" Meredith lifts her head from my shoulder and gives me a confused look.

"So I have a chance at getting off at a decent hour so I can take you home." I tell her.

"Do you want to trash talk daytime TV with me?" She grins up at me.

"I'd love to." I say as we lie back on the bed. Meredith stretches out beside me and flicks on the TV.

We watch for a few hours and by the time I'm called away its approaching 3 o'clock. Unfortunately one of my patients has a complication and I'm forced to take him back into surgery. Fortunately it's a quick procedure and I'm out by quarter to five. I grab a bite to eat before I go searching for Dr. Bailey.

"Bailey!" I call out when I spot her at the nurses' station by the OR board.

"Yes Dr. Shepherd." She looks up at me annoyed.

"I was uh, wondering when you are planning on discharging Meredith." I ask.

"Well, I have an appy in," She pauses to check the clock, "twenty minutes. I told Grey I'd discharge her when I'm done with that."

"Perfect. Thank you Miranda." I say sincerely. She nods at me with a sort of approving look and I take that as my cue to leave. I rush off to tie together the last loose ends so that I can leave as soon as the ink has dried on Meredith's discharge forms.

* * *

Of course plans never play out the way you hope they do and just fifteen minutes before Meredith is set to be discharged the pit is flooded with victims of a hotel fire. As if that isn't bad enough, the resident's screwed up and now a patient who should have been perfectly fine is dead and I'm here stuck babysitting residents while the Chief interrogates them one by one.

* * *

It's bridging on ten when I finally make it back to Meredith's room. Meredith's already signed her discharge forms and Bailey is giving her last minute home care instructions.

Meredith stands to switch from the bed to the wheelchair. Her face goes from excited to concern as she turns to face me. "You okay?" She looks up at me as she settles into the chair

I don't acknowledge her question. "Ready to go?" I move to stand behind the chair. Meredith doesn't say anything but I can tell she's not giving up on finding out what's wrong. I swing the bags over my shoulder and we're off

"What else happened today?" She asks softly. I sigh and flip the question over in my head. It should be an easy question but I'm not sure how to answer it.

"There was a fire at a hotel." I give her the simple explanation and tell myself the details can wait for later. That appeases Meredith and we continue to the front entrance in silence. Mark is waiting with my car at the front entrance.

"Need any help?" He asks as I help Meredith stand from the chair.

"Yeah can you put the bags in the back seat and take the chair back inside?" My full attention is on helping Meredith into the SUV which is harder than I expected it to be. She groans as she steps up into the car and struggles to get herself into a comfortable position. She winces as she tries to pull the seatbelt across her body.

"Here" I grab her pillow and put it across her stomach before I reach over and pull her seatbelt across her body. "Better?"

"Yeah" She says softly. I shut her door and scurry over to the drivers' side. I get in the car and blast the heat in order to keep the frigid October air at bay. I drive slowly and cautiously, partially for Meredith's sake, partially because only a third of my attention is focused on the road. The other two thirds are going towards Meredith and the fact that Richard just fired a perfectly good resident. I can tell the car ride is rough for Meredith. She's sitting straight up with eyes closed and her lower lip trapped between her teeth. She lets out little whimpers every time we hit a bump or take a turn and I feel terrible. I focus on getting us home.

* * *

When we finally pull into the driveway I can't help but feel relieved. I only bask in the feeling for a second though before I rush to the other side of the car to help Meredith. I pull her door open and undo her seatbelt before gingerly helping her ease out of the car before grabbing the necessary bags. I keep my arm firmly around her waist and she leans most of her weight on me as we walk to the front door. I unlock the door and usher Meredith into the house I quickly pull off my jacket and haphazardly hang it up before I help Meredith out of her coat. I hang her coat with more care than my own before I sweep her into my arms.

"What are you doing!?" She shrieks.

"I'm helping." I give her a big grin. "Bailey said no strenuous activity. Stairs are pretty strenuous you know." She doesn't engage, instead choosing to roll her eyes and drop her head onto my shoulder. I carry her upstairs to our bedroom and gently lay her on the bed. I help her change into a fresh pair of pajamas before she painstakingly settles into bed.

"It's really bad isn't it?" I ask as she winces yet again while trying to adjust comfortably.

"It was better with the constant morphine drip and the limited movement but now I feel like I've run a marathon." She further punctuates her point by yawning. Instead of saying anything I hurry downstairs to fetch a glass of water and some painkillers. I return and hand them off to her wordlessly. I turn to change into my own sleepwear. By the time I crawl into bed, Meredith appears to have found a comfortable position and her eyes are closed. I settle in beside her and close my eyes as well.

"What's wrong?" Meredith's quiet question surprises me.

"What do you mean?" I know exactly what she means but I play dumb.

"You've been quiet. Why?" She doesn't give up.

"It's nothing." I refute. I don't want to trouble her with hospital gossip.

"Did you lose a patient?" She pushes onward.

"Not exactly."

"What's that supposed to mean?" She picks her head up to look at me.

"There was a…communication error between the residents. Someone died and Richard had this whole investigation thing going on. One of the Mercy Westers forgot to check the patient's throat for soot and she got fired because of it."

"Oh." Meredith says quietly.

"Oh?" It's my turn to pick my head up and look at her. Her eyes are closed and she looks ready to fall asleep.

"Too tired to have a full conversation. We can talk tomorrow." She yawns.

"Okay." I can tell the excitement of being home has worn off, replaced by the appeasing pull of the painkillers.

"I love you Meredith." I whisper but she's already asleep.

* * *

 **AN: OMG you guys are amazing with the reviews! Thank you soo much for your feedback and I'm really glad you guys enjoy the story. This is one of my favorite chapters because I loooove superhero Derek. Anyway I'll let you guys make your own opinions as long as you leave them in the reviews. See you next Friday!**


	10. Day 9

**Day 9**

"Derek. Derek!"

"Wha…" I jerk awake to the sound of someone calling my name.

"Derek." Meredith whines. "I have to pee."

"Okay." My brain clearly isn't firing on all cylinders. The alarm clock tells me it's a little after three in the morning. "So go."

"I can't get up." Meredith says meekly. "It hurts to try." I look over at her. She's lying mostly on her back and through the dim moonlight flooding the room I can tell she's looking at me. I reach over and turn on the lamp on my side of the bed. I blink to adjust to the light but when I look over at Meredith my vision is suddenly clear and I'm wide awake.

Her eyes are red and puffy and tears tracks mar her face. She looks absolutely exhausted.

"Are you okay?" It's a stupid question, of course she's not okay, but it's the only question I can think to ask.

"Yeah, I just…it hurts." Her lower lip is wobbling a little. I sit up more and run my thumb along her cheek; wiping away some of the tears as I go.

"How long have you been awake?" _And why didn't you wake me sooner?_

"Not long, only ten minutes or so." I can tell she's not lying. "I just thought I could get up myself, I mean, I'd been doing it at the hospital. But there I had constant painkillers and I could control the bed." She's rambling and the slight blush tells me she's embarrassed asking for help.

"Meredith," I cut her off, "it's okay. I'll help you." I kick off the covers and stand from the bed. I move to Meredith's side and pull the covers back. She won't meet my eyes, presumably from embarrassment, so without saying anything I slide my hands under her knees and shoulders and lift her from the bed. She wraps her arms around my neck and lays her head on my shoulder as I walk her to the bathroom. I set her down gently in front of the toilet and help her pull down her pants and sit before I move to stand in the doorway with my back to her in order to give her some semblance of privacy. I can tell she's embarrassed and I know she doesn't want me to see her this way regardless. I can hear her sniffling as she pees and her grunts of pain as she stands. I turn around as she washes her hands and when she's done I pick her up and bring her back to bed.

"Thank you." She whispers as I put her down. I grab a tissue from the bedside table and hand it to her to wipe her face.

"You're welcome." I tell her like it's no big deal. I return to my side of the bed and lay down again.

"Are you comfortable?" I ask as she shifts.

"Yeah." She says quietly. She's more on her side now which allows me to roll over so my chest is to her back. I run my hand up and down her arm, shoulder to elbow.

"I love you." I whisper into the darkness. She murmurs something akin to that before her breaths even out into sleep.

* * *

Despite going to bed late and despite being awoken at three in the morning, my internal doctor clock wakes me up at 6:30. I desperately try to roll over and go back to sleep but to no avail. Instead I drag myself from the bed. Meredith is still sleeping soundly in her pile of pillows and blankets. I shut the blinds so the sunlight doesn't wake her before I gather some clothes and head across the hall. I take a while in the shower, a luxury I don't usually have, and when I check on Meredith nearly an hour later she's still sound asleep. I head downstairs and make myself some breakfast which I eat quickly. I entertain myself with a few mundane household tasks, doing the dishes, doing laundry, cleaning the counters, etc. I check on Meredith intermittently. It's nearing 9 o'clock when she starts to stir. At this point I've taken to reading a book sitting in bed beside her. Meredith shifts and reaches up to rub her eyes.

"Good morning." I smile at her. She replies with a yawn and an unintelligible grumble. I back off and let her wake up some. Meredith Grey is many things but a morning person isn't one of them.

When she is awake enough she responds with "Hey"

"How are you feeling?" I ask. She pauses as if to take stock of her body.

"Okay." She says eventually. "Better than last night at least." I brush some stray hairs away from her face and she blinks at the light that was shielded by her thick hair.

"You're due for a pill but you can't take it on an empty stomach." I say. I had set myself timers on my watch specifically for when she is due for a pill.

"Okay." She doesn't seem all that interested in eating.

"Any requests for breakfast?"

"I'm not really hungry so something small." She closes her eyes and pulls the comforter up to her chin. I have to remind myself that it's normal for post-op patients to be tired and lethargic but I still worry.

"I'll be right back." I whisper. I head downstairs and make a bagel with cream cheese. I grab a glass and fill it with orange juice before bringing it all back upstairs for Meredith. She appears to be dozing and I almost want to let her sleep. Begrudgingly, I set the glass and the plate down on her bedside table before I sit down beside her.

"Meredith."I rub her shoulder through the blankets. She opens her eyes and her gaze is bleary and annoyed. "You need to eat." I shove the plate at her. She heaves a giant sigh before she wiggles into a semi sitting position. With some help from me, she manages to sit up against the headboard. I hand her the bagel and she eats it, slowly but she finishes it. When she's done I hand her the glass of orange juice and a dose of Percocet and an antibiotic. She swallows the pills without a fight and polishes off the orange juice. She gives me the empty glass before lying down and pulling the blankets over herself. I set the glass down on the bedside table.

"Do you need anything?" I ask as I tuck her in. She shakes her head under the covers. I lean down and plant a kiss on the top of her head.

"Wait!" She calls from other the covers. "Will you lie with me? Please?"

"Of course." I say. I pull back the comforter and slide in behind her. Her back is to my chest although the only thing touching is the fabric of our shirts. I rest my forehead against the back of her head and tuck my fist under my chin. Normally I would wrap my arm around Meredith but with her incision still so fresh I don't take any chances. I feel her body relax into sleep and while I should probably get up and be productive I'm content to just lie here with her. I'm not tired so I take to memorizing every detail of the back of Meredith's head and listen to her rancorous snores.

* * *

Eventually I manage to pull myself from the warm cocoon that is our bed and I head downstairs. I manage to dig Meredith's IPod out of the black hole she calls her purse and upload new music and games for her. After some Googling, troubleshooting and swearing I manage to rent a few movies on Meredith's laptop. I intend to move the TV up to our room sometime when I can convince Mark to come over so that Meredith can watch all the crappy daytime TV her heart desires. Until then the movies and music will hold her over.

When I go to check on Meredith I find her in the process of waking up; she's still rubbing the sleep from her eyes.

"Hey" I say as I plop down on the side of the bed. "How are you?"

"Okay" She mumbles. "What time is it?" She tries turning her head towards the clock on her bedside table.

"Just after one." I save her the trouble. She looks at me wide eyed.

"I slept for like, fourteen hours." She says incredulous.

"It's the first time in a week you've been able to sleep without interruption from a nurse or doctor." I remind her. She still looks surprised but satisfied with my answer. Her stomach grumbles loudly before either of us can say anything else.

"I'd ask if you want lunch but I just got my answer." I tease. Meredith swats my arm and tries to sit up. I meet her halfway and help her ease the rest of the way up.

"I need to go to the bathroom." She grumbles as she swings her legs over the side of the bed.

"Do you want help?" I hold out my arms almost as if to support her even if she's still sitting beside me.

"No, I got it. Besides, I need to stretch my legs anyway." She uses my shoulder for leverage and hobbles over to the bathroom. It takes every bone in my body not to chase after her and make sure she's okay. I hear the toilet flush and water running in the sink. Slowly the bathroom door creaks open and Meredith emerges looking no worse for wear. She sits in the same spot she was before and leans her head onto my shoulder.

"So, lunch?" I ask. Meredith moans softly but I feel her nod against my shoulder.

"Yeah that would be good." She whispers.

"Do you want to eat up here or camp out downstairs on the couch?" I anticipate her wanting to stay in bed but her answer surprises me.

"Downstairs." She says.

"Really? It's going to be a lot more comfortable to sleep in the bed than it is on the couch." I say.

"Yeah, but my back hurts and I'm sick of being in bed. I need a change of scenery. Oh and some crappy daytime might help too." Her last comment is sarcastic but she seems genuinely enthused by the idea of getting away from bed so I figure it best not to argue with her. Instead I wrap one arm around her shoulders and slide the other one under her knees. I lift her with ease and carry her downstairs. I gently set her down on the couch and make a little nest out of the throw pillows and blankets that are all over the couch.

"What do you want for lunch?" I ask once she's all settled.

"I don't know, a sandwich maybe?" She suggests halfheartedly.

"One sandwich coming right up." I hop up and, with mock enthusiasm, I head to the kitchen. We don't have a lot of food, a byproduct of no one being home for a week, but I manage to find some non-moldy bread and some peanut butter and honey. I slap two sandwiches together and slice them in half before returning to the living room with the sandwiches and some water for both of us. Meredith's eyes are closed but her breathing is too shallow for her to be asleep. When I set the plates down on the table she opens her eyes.

"We're out of jelly so I made peanut butter and honey instead." I hand her a plate and she shifts into a more comfortable position for eating. Meredith moves her feet so I have a place to sit. Once I'm settled I pull her feet back into my lap so she's comfortable. We eat in a companionable silence. Once she's done, Meredith places her plate on the table and reaches for the remote. She flips through the channel until she finds some sort of made for TV movie that appears to satisfy her interest. She moves the pillow that was supporting her back so that she can lie down comfortably. I rub the arch of her foot with the pad of my thumb and watch the movie as well. I can't tell you what it's about, but I can probably describe the intricate arch of Meredith's foot to you.

* * *

Its two hours later before something particularly noteworthy happens. And by noteworthy I mean my phone rings. Meredith is fast asleep beside me and the TV is long forgotten. I quietly stand up and tiptoe out of the living room and into the den. I pick up the phone on the last ring without checking the caller ID.

"Hello?"

"Derek, hey, it's Lexie." She sounds nervous.

"Hi Lexie what's up?" I ask.

"Oh… not much. H-hows Meredith?" Yep, she's definitely nervous.

"She's okay. She's asleep now on the couch."

"Good, good, I was just calling to tell you that Dad…I uh…I mean Thatcher was discharged. I just brought him home." That's why she's so nervous.

"Okay. Thank you Lexie I'll pass it on to Meredith." I tell her.

"Oh…okay." Lexie says. I hear some sort of noise in the background. "I should go. Tell Meredith I say hi."

"Will do. Bye Lexie." I hear her call goodbye as I hit end call. When I turn around Meredith is standing in the doorway

"Hey," I say surprised, "did I wake you?"

"I don't think so." She says her voice still hoarse with sleep. "Who were you talking to?"

"Lexie, she wanted me to tell you Thatcher was discharged." I cross the room in one long stride so that I'm standing in front of her. I put my hands on her hips and she leans into me limply.

"That's good." She says. I don't push for anything more. "Can we go back upstairs?" I nod and pick her up. I bring her upstairs and lay her down in bed. She's due for another pill so I give her that then I lie down next to her.

"Dinner's soon. Any requests?" I ask.

"Can we order pizza?" She asks hopefully. The part of her usual self that shines through with that request makes me smile.

"Sure."

"Thank you." She smiles at me.

"I love you Meredith."

* * *

 **AN: Are you ready for Meredith's month of daytime hell? By the way thanks for all the feedback and I'm glad ya'll are glad that Meredith will be home. I have quite a few ideas up my sleeve. Leave a review because I love seeing them and I'll talk to you guys net week.**


	11. Day 10

**Day 10**

All though Meredith sleeps soundly through the night, my internal doctor clock wakes me up at 6 AM again. I don't try to fight it, instead I try to use the time productively by checking up on things at the hospital.

Just because I'm on leave doesn't mean I'm off duty.

I sit at the kitchen table with my laptop and bowl of cereal as I check up on all my patients and scroll through my email. It's all said and done pretty quickly because all my patients are a few days post-op and anything new or emergent is handed off to Nelson and Weller. It's about 8:30 and I figure Meredith will be awake soon so I decide to make her breakfast. I quickly make French toast batter and fry up some bacon. It's truly an artery clogging, Meredith style breakfast. I arrange it all neatly on a tray; I also add a glass of orange juice and a pitcher of syrup which I know she'll use all of. I make my way upstairs and set the tray down on Meredith's bedside table. She's still asleep and I contemplate whether or not I should wake her. In the end I decide she'll more than likely go back to sleep later.

"Meredith." I whisper and rub her shoulder through the blankets.

"Mmmm?" She mumbles sleepily as she tries to pick her head up.

"I made you breakfast." I say.

"Okay." She sighs and burrows deeper into the blankets. I have to hold back the urge to chuckle. Mornings have never gone well with Meredith regardless of if she's sick or not.

"Do you want to eat?" I ask.

"Eat what?"She mumbles from under her blanket cocoon.

"The breakfast I made you." The urge to chuckle is barely held back by the seal of my lips.

"Oh." She doesn't say anything other than that and I almost think she's fallen back to sleep. "Yeah." She pushes the covers back some. I help prop her up on some pillows before I slide the tray into her lap. She blinks a few times before she slowly picks up the fork and knife and begins to eat.

"Thank you for making me breakfast." She says after a while. She's demolished most of her toast and all of the bacon.

"You're welcome." I say as I kiss the side of her head. "You're due for a pill." I reach around and grab the bottles off her bedside table. She swallows them with her remaining orange juice before she lets out a satisfied sigh and lies back against the pillows. I quickly take the tray downstairs and clean up before I head back upstairs. I expect to find Meredith asleep again but instead she's flipping through an old New England Journal of Medicine. She doesn't seem particularly engaged but I make no comment. Instead I climb into bed beside her and grab my book off of my end table. I find my way to the place I left off and begin reading.

When I look over at Meredith no more than fifteen minutes later the magazine has dropped from her grip and her head is tipped to one side. All though she's not snoring I can tell she's fallen back to sleep. I take the magazine from her lax grip and place it on the nightstand. I adjust her pillows so that her head is better position before I tuck the blankets around her and tiptoe out of the room. I continue my reading downstairs on the couch. I'm another chapter through my book when there's a soft knock at the door. I silently thank whoever it is for being quiet as I stand and answer the door.

"Hey man." Mark says as he steps into the house.

"Hey" I say as I close the door behind him. He sets a plastic bag on the table in the kitchen and begins pulling takeout containers out of it.

"Why…Oh." I think it's too early for lunch until I look up and see it's almost one in the afternoon.

"Yeah I figured you might be living on a slightly normal person schedule so I picked up some food." Mark shrugs.

"What are you doing here anyway?" It isn't that I'm not happy to see him, I just wasn't expecting him.

"I have the day off and you mentioned moving the TV and stuff but I thought I'd at least stop by and see how Grey's doing." Mark has a devilish smirk on his face. "Get some fresh gossip and insider information for my bets." I roll my eyes at him and turn back to the takeout.

"What did you get?" I ask.

"Italian, there's some for Grey in there too if she wants it." He says. I nod and grab the takeout container that's for her and put it in the fridge.

"Thanks man." I say as we sit down to eat. We eat quietly for a minute before Mark breaks the peace.

"How is Grey anyway?" He asks as he winds a particularly long strand of linguini around his fork.

"She's okay." She's mostly just been sleeping or resting. Nothing interesting for your gambling habit, sorry." I tease him. He fakes disappointment before going back to his food.

"How's her incision healing? I'm sorry I would've come stitched it up myself but Lexie kind of fell asleep on me." Mark says.

"Good. She ripped a few stitches day four post-op but other than that it's okay. I really haven't gotten much of a chance to look at it." I make a mental note to look at it tonight, possibly after she showers. "Thanks for offering though even if it is a little late."

* * *

After we finish eating, I go check on Meredith while Mark makes himself at home. Meredith is still sleeping and when I come downstairs Mark is on the couch watching a baseball game. I head to the kitchen and grab beers for each of us before I sit down beside him. He takes his drink wordlessly and we watch the TV. The game is in the 4th inning and its pretty close although I don't recognize the teams playing. We make the occasional remarks on different plays but all and all it's pretty quiet.

"Derek!" The voice is way to high pitched and far away to be Mark's but I look at him anyways. He's looking in the direction of the stairs and I look in the same direction before all the pieces fall into place.

"Meredith." I say as I stand all though I'm sure Mark already figured that out. I head up the stairs and I hurry down the hall. When I get to our bedroom, I find Meredith sitting up yawning and stretching her arms over her head. The gesture almost could've been some sort of comic bit if it weren't for how she tiredly leaned back against the pillows afterwards.

"Hey." I walk into the room and sit on my side of the bed.

"Hey." She says softly. I reach to brush a strand of loose hair from her forehead.

"How are you feeling?" I'm getting a little sick of asking the question and I'm sure she's sick of answering it but it needs to be asked.

"Okay." She gives a noncommittal shrug. However her stomach rumbles in contradiction. "A little hungry though." She giggles.

"Well you're in luck. Mark came over and he brought you food." I say.

"He's my new favorite person." She jokes and I feign hurt.

"Fine I see how it is." I cross my arms over my chest and pout.

"I'm kidding." She shoves me gently. "Can you go get me food now?" I smile and get up to go heat up her food. When I return to our room with a steaming container of fettuccini, a fork, and a glass of water Meredith is still sitting up and eagerly awaiting her lunch.

"Thank you." She says when I hand her the container.

"Mark's still here so while you're still awake we'll bring the TV up here." Meredith only nods in acknowledgement as she devours her food. When I head back downstairs, Mark is still camped out on the couch watching the baseball game.

"I hate to interrupt your whole relaxing thing you have going on but Meredith's awake so we're going to move the TV now." Mark grunts and stretches before he stands and flicks the TV off with the remote. We begin unplugging things and pulling the TV from the wall. With much grunting and swearing we manage to lug the TV upstairs, down the hall, and into the bedroom. Meredith watches as we go about plugging the setup back in and offers feedback on where to position it.

"Is that good?" I ask as I stand and wipe sweat from my brow.

"Yeah," Meredith nods, "and if not I can always move. I have this whole queen size mattress to work with." Her tone is light and joking with an undercurrent of frustration.

"That's the spirit Grey." Mark says. We do a final check before we turn on the TV to make sure it's working. The screen flickers to life so Mark and I high-five.

"Thanks man." I say.

"No problem." Mark wipes the sweat from his face with his shirt. "I'd like to stay longer but I should probably go home and shower."

"Okay well thanks for coming over." Meredith says from the bed.

"Anytime, I'll see you guys later." Mark leaves and a few moments later we hear the front door slam followed by the opening of a car door and the roar of an engine.

"I need a shower too." I say.

"Yeah you kind of do." Meredith looks me up and down and wrinkles her nose.

"You're one to talk." I tease. "You haven't showered since we've been home."

"I'm injured; you can't make fun of me." She pouts.

"I just lugged the TV upstairs for you; you can't make fun of me." I pout.

"Fine." She sighs.

"How about I shower really quickly then I help you shower?" I suggest. Meredith nods and I head off to take my shower.

* * *

When I'm finished I don't bother putting new clothes on. Instead I wrap a towel around my waist and go help Meredith. She's sitting up in bed waiting for me. I pull clothes for both of us from the dresser and set them in the bathroom before I re-enter the bedroom. I scoop Meredith up and carry her into the bathroom where I sit her atop the closed toilet. I help her strip to nothing but the bandage on her stomach.

"Let's leave the bandage on until after then it will just fall right off." I suggest and Meredith nods in agreement. I turn on the shower and make sure it's the right temperature before I help her over the ledge into the shower. I position us so Meredith is mostly in the spray and I am mostly out of it. I'm quick because Bailey's instructions were specific about ten minute showers so in no time lathering her hair with shampoo. I rinse and repeat with conditioner.

"Do you feel okay?" I ask Meredith as she rests her head against my chest.

"Yeah…just…getting tired." She mumbles. I quickly lather her body with soap and let the stream wash it away before I help her out of the shower. She drops onto the toilet lid like a bag of bricks. I quickly help her dress and I don't even bother dressing myself; I just carry her back to our room. I lay her down in the bed and pull her shirt up. The bandage peels off easy and I quickly rub some cream over the incision before replacing the bandage. I tuck Meredith in and kiss her forehead. Her eyes are closed and she doesn't respond so assume she fell asleep at some point. I quickly change into my pajamas and head downstairs for a snackish meal thing. I eat quickly before I climb into bed next to Meredith. When I lay down the clock reads 7:21 and I can't recall a time in the past year when I've gone to bed this early. Hell I can't recall a time since childhood that I've gone to bed this early. Meredith subconsciously adjusts to my presence in the bed and latches onto my hand.

"Goodnight Meredith. I love you."

* * *

 **AN: Heyo! Welcome back. I hope you liked the filler fluff. More to come on Meredith's scar. Keep leaving reviews, they make my day. Can you believe it? This story is already ten chapters long!**


	12. Day 11

**Day 11**

This morning I realize there is no food in the house. At all.

We don't usually keep the fridge stocked to the brim because the life of a surgeon is unpredictable and in the 72 hours it takes to deal with a trauma a half gallon of milk can go bad. So we thrive on non-perishables and half dozen eggs at a time. However as I go to pour my cereal only the little shredded crumbles of what was my cereal fall into the bowl and when I check the fridge we are completely out of eggs and have only a smidge of milk left. Which leaves me with a dilemma: I have to go grocery shopping but I don't want to leave Meredith alone. I know Mark is on shift and after a quick conversation with him I know that so is Cristina and Lexie is still taking care of Thatcher. That leaves me with Alex Karev. I don't dislike Alex I just don't know him that well. The only reason we hang out is because of Meredith and that camping trip that happened years ago. He seems nice enough and he cares about Meredith which I can appreciate I just don't know what to say to him. Nonetheless I'd rather not have Meredith starve so I grab my phone and call the number Meredith programmed into my phone after we got back together.

"Hello?" The voice of Alex Karev greets me on the other end of the line.

"Alex? It's Derek." I say.

"So?" He sounds irritated.

"I need you to do me a favor." I say.

"No." He says.

"It's for Meredith." I try.

"Why? What's up?" His tone turns from aggravation to concern.

"I need to go out and I need you to stay with her." I say.

"I thought you weren't working." His voice hardens again.

"I'm not but we're out of food." I say dejectedly. I hear him sigh and there's some rustling in the background.

"Fine I'll be there in forty minutes tops." He says. "I want surgeries for this though."

"Three surgeries. You can assist and there will be no Mercy Westers." I promise.

"Cool." He says then the line goes dead. I head upstairs to change into more presentable clothes and to check on Meredith. She's still asleep which is to be expected. I change quietly before I kneel down beside her so that I am eye level with her.

"Meredith." I whisper as I run my fingers along her cheek. "Meredith."

"Hmmm." She mumbles and shifts a little but shows no signs of true wakefulness.

"Meredith." I try again. "Hey I need you to wake up for a second."

"Whaa…" She opens her eyes this time and squints at the change in light.

"I need to go to the store." I squeeze in my whole agenda while I know I have her attention. "Alex is coming over to stay with you, okay?"

"M'kay." She mumbles into her pillow. I brush the loose hair out of her eyes and peck her cheek. I grab my watch off the dresser and head downstairs to wait for Alex and leave Meredith to sleep.

True to his word Alex knocks on the door forty minutes after we talked looking exhausted and carrying a Walmart bag in his right hand.

"Hey man." I say as I open the door and let him in. He grunts in place of a greeting and immediately kicks of his shoes.

"So Meredith is still asleep and she'll probably stay that way; feel free to make yourself comfortable." I say gesturing around.

"Dude you sound like a parent talking to a babysitter. Mer's a grownup I'll just make sure she doesn't do anything stupid." He shrugs and trudges over to the couch where he collapses and pulls a box of cereal out of his Walmart bag. I don't really know what to say to that so I just grab my keys and leave.

* * *

The grocery shopping goes by pretty quick and I even manage to pick up a few books, movies and magazines for Meredith. When I return home, Alex's car is still in the driveway but he's nowhere to be found when I enter the house. I bring in all the groceries and put stuff away before I go on my search for Alex and Meredith. Finally when everything is in its place I head upstairs to the master bedroom. I find Alex camped out on my side of the bed and Meredith on her side. They're both sitting up and Meredith is leaning her head on his shoulder. They appear to watching some crappy daytime TV and passing Alex's cereal between each other. I almost want to leave them be but Meredith notices me before I can back out of the room.

"Hey." She smiles at me.

"Hey." I reply. Alex looks up from the TV screen and when he sees me he gets up off the bed.

"Kept her alive for you." He says, thrusting his thumb in Meredith's direction.

"Oh yes because I was soooo difficult." She rolls her eyes at him. He smirks and gently pushes past me on his way out of the room.

"Alex!" Meredith calls out, "you forgot your cereal!"

"Keep it." He yells back. I hear some scuffling around downstairs then the front door slams.

"So you had fun?" I ask as I sit in the spot Alex had just been occupying. Meredith nods as she shovels a mouthful of cereal into her mouth.

"Do you want a real breakfast or are you happy with your cereal?" I tease. Meredith smirks mockingly at me and throws a piece of cereal at me and I take that as my answer. She then snuggles up next to me and I wrap my arm around her.

"What are we watching?" I ask.

"Don't know, don't care." Meredith says.

"Well aren't we in a mood this morning." I say mockingly. Meredith sneers at me playfully.

"I've reached that point in my recovery where I feel well enough to do things but I can't and it's annoying." She says.

"You've only been home for three days." I point out.

"I knooow" Meredith moans as she flops back on her pillow. "I'm still bored though."

"Now I regret offering the trailer to Izzie and Alex." I say as I roll onto my back.

"You didn't really offer so much as force." Meredith grumbles as she too rolls onto her back.

"Mmmm." I mumble in agreement. We're quiet for a few minutes before an idea strikes me.

"We could go watch the ferryboats."

"What?" Meredith picks her head up to look at me.

"We could go to that spot you took me to when we were first dating, with the cliff where you can see the ferryboats." I feel like I've struck gold but Meredith looks a little hesitant.

"It's a good idea but…" She trails off and bites her lip.

"But…?" I push.

"It's just…the car was really uncomfortable." Meredith says sheepishly. "I mean it's a good idea and all. I just don't think I can sit in the car that long." She looks really apologetic.

"Meredith it's okay." I soothe. "It was just a suggestion but if you don't think you can handle it we can save it for when you're feeling a little better." Now I feel bad because the whole idea was to get her out of the house and make her feel better but that appears to have failed.

"Do you want lunch?" I ask. It's four o'clock so it would be more of an early dinner but I have an idea and I don't think I want to wait two hours to execute it.

"Sure." Meredith shrugs dejectedly.

"Okay. I'll go make it." I say as I get up off the bed and head downstairs. Once in the kitchen I begin pulling out all the ingredients for lunch/dinner and preparing my plan.

* * *

It's over an hour later when I finally head upstairs to get Meredith. My plan is working perfectly and all I need is Meredith. When I get to the bedroom Meredith is dozing, softly snoring with the blanket half covering her.

"Meredith." I whisper as I sit down on the edge of the bed and rub her shoulder gently. Her eyes crack open and her jaw opens wide in a yawn. I back off and let her wake up some more.

"Dinner's ready." I tell her when I think she's sufficiently awake.

"M'kay." She mumbles as she sits up and looks around. "Where is it?"

"Downstairs, I figured you might want a change in scenery." I say as I stand and slide my arms under her knees and shoulders. She doesn't protest, instead choosing to wrap her arms around my neck and leaning her head on my shoulder. When we reach the bottom of the stairs I take her hand and lead her to the living room. She looks confused but it quickly morphs into surprise when she sees what I've planned. I tore all the cushions off the couch and put them on the floor. I then surrounded them with an abundance of pillows and blankets. In front of the makeshift pillow fort-like structure is the coffee table. On it are my laptop and two steaming plates of mushroom risotto. The plates are on placemats and I poured apple juice into wine glasses seeing as how Meredith can't have alcohol; it's fancy but not over the top.

"Woah." Meredith says from beside me. When she looks up at me her eyes are sparkling. "You did all of this?"

"Yep." I smile at her. "Do you like it?"

"It's great." She steps into the room to take in the scene in front of her. "You know I never built a pillow fort." She turns back to look at me.

"Really?" I'm surprised but I shouldn't be considering the little snippets she's told me about the lonely experience of being Ellis Grey's child.

"Nope." She shakes her head before she steps further into the room. She ungracefully uses the coffee table to lower herself onto her knees before she crawls over all the pillows and finds herself a spot that is comfortable. I drop onto the pillows beside her and she rests her head on my chest.

"What's the laptop for?" She asks.

"I figured we could watch a movie. It'll be like a drive in theater kind of."

"Those were way before my time." She chuckles.

"Mine too," I say, "but I still think it will be fun." She nods in agreement before leaning forward to examine her meal. I take that as my cue to set up the movie. As the opening credits begin I start eating but I'm shortly disrupted when Meredith realizes what we're watching.

" _Schindler's List,_ Seriously?" She looks disbelieving.

"Yeah it's a good movie." I shrug.

"But it's so sad." She pouts a little. "Wasn't the whole point of this," She gestures at my elaborate setup, "to cheer me up or whatever?"

"Yeah and I thought a good movie might help." I defend.

"But it's about the persecution and genocide of millions of people!" Meredith exclaims.

"No it's about the hero that saves some of them from the genocide." I argue. I appear to have rendered her speechless as she slouches in defeat. She sits back and watches the movie in silence while we eat. Personally it's one of my favorite movies. I like the idea of there still being some good people in the midst of the Nazis' final solution. Eventually we finish eating and end up wrapped around each other in a tangle of limbs and blankets. When the final credits roll Meredith lets out a big yawn. I rub her arm shoulder elbow and she nuzzles her nose into my neck.

"Do you want to go back to bed?" I ask her.

"Kinda but I don't wanna move." She mumbles and her breath tickles my neck.

"I could carry you." I offer. She just shakes her head so I don't move. We sit there in silence and it's kind of nice. Eventually though Meredith is breathing evenly and my back is starting to hurt so I make the executive decision to bring her to bed. Conveniently she is already in her pajamas so all I have to do is tuck her in. I quickly change and climb into bed beside her, turning the light off as I go.

"Goodnight Meredith, I love you." I say as I throw my arm over her sleeping body.

* * *

 **AN: Personally I really like this chapter but you can leave you're opinion in the reviews. I'm glad y'all are sticking with the story and enjoying. Drop a review and I'll see you next week.**


	13. Day 12

**Day 12**

I'm surprised when I roll over and the clock reads 9:02. Meredith is still blissfully asleep beside me. The curtains are drawn so no natural light shines through. However, we live in Seattle so the chances of there actually being a lot of sun to begin with are slim. I lie in bed and allow myself to wake up slowly; which, as a surgeon, is a luxury I'm not usually granted. When I feel sufficiently awake, I slowly rise and creep out of the room as not to wake Meredith. I head downstairs into the kitchen and make myself some cereal. After I finish my breakfast, I set to work making breakfast for Meredith. I decide on pancakes and set to work gathering ingredients and preparing breakfast. When the pancakes are done I adorn them with bananas and whipped cream, methodically placed to form a smiley face. I also pour a glass of orange juice and a pitcher of maple syrup which I'm sure Meredith will use all of. To my surprise, when I get upstairs, Meredith is already awake and sitting up, looking rather alert. Her expression lights up when I walk in with the tray of pancakes.

"One artery clogging breakfast." I joke. Instead of a rebuttal, Meredith smirks at me and digs into her stack of pancakes.

"Well?" I say as I sit on my side of the bed. "Are they good?"

"Mmmmhm thank you." She affirms around a mouth of pancakes. I smile and lay back on my stack of pillows.

"You're very welcome." I smile up at her. We sit in silence while she finishes eating. I steal one or two bites and she mock glares at me. It's all very mundane and relaxed and I kind of like it.

"What should we do today?" Meredith asks when she finishes eating.

"I don't know. What do you want to do today?" I feel bad turning the question on her but I honestly have no ideas.

"Umm…" She gazes at the ceiling while she ponders her options; her upper teeth catching her lower lip. "I got nothing." She sighs.

"How about a movie marathon?" I suggest. I already know she won't go for it but it's worth a shot.

"No, I've had enough TV." She sighs.

"We could watch some old surgery tapes." I suggest.

"Okay." She sounds defeated but okay with the idea. I went downstairs and grabbed the old box in which we stored Ellis's old tapes. I brought the box up to Meredith and let her choose one. She handed me her selection and I pop the tape into the VCR. When an open heart surgery pops on the screen I look over at Meredith, surprised with her selection.

"I need something bloody." She shrugs by way of explanation. I don't argue, instead choosing to sit back and watch the surgery along with her.

The chest has barely been cracked open when I notice Meredith is asleep. I leave the TV running, but I slide out of bed and sneak downstairs. Once safely in the study, I sit down at my desk and open my laptop up. I pull up all the information I can on how my department is running. All the surgeries have been routine and there hasn't been any kinks in the schedule. I move to patient updates next. I see the Mrs. Patters is doing well as is Casey, the little girl who I place a shunt for. I see that Mr. Parker was discharged yesterday and poor Mr. Walters has yet to make a decision on his son's life support. I make a few notes on the legal pad beside me before I close out the departmental stuff and open up my email. I see a few product endorsements and I send those straight to spam. I reply to a few consult requests and I read through the usual departmental notices that show up all the time. I feel as if I'm done pretty fast but as I'm shutting down my laptop, two hours have passed. I hurry to check on Meredith but I find her still asleep in the same position she was in before. I grab a change of clothes and head for the bathroom to shower.

I'm mid shower when I hear the bathroom door creak open and I assume its Meredith coming in to use the bathroom. I am surprised, however, when the shower door slides open and Meredith is standing there completely naked. I step back to let her in. Using my hand for leverage, she steps over the lip and leans into me under the spray.

"No shower sex." I warn her

"No shower sex." She repeats with a sigh. I help her lather her hair with shampoo before rinsing and repeating with conditioner. She helps me wash the remaining soap off my body before I lather her up rinse her off. We step out of the shower and I wrap Meredith in a towel before I hastily dry myself off and dress myself in old jeans and a t-shirt. I'm helping her into a fresh pair of pajama bottoms and she's leaning on my shoulders for balance when suddenly, she's dead weight on my shoulders. Her body is tilted forward and from what I can see, her gaze isn't focused.

Not good.

"Woah." I say as I clumsily try to steady both of us and keep upright. Meredith is limp in my arms and it terrifies me.

"Meredith?" I shake her shoulders gently. She rouses but only slightly and all of her weight is still on me.

"Mmmmm…." She sounds almost drunk and most definitely not fully conscious. I scoop her up and carry her to our bed. She's half naked but I could care less as I lay her down flat and elevate her feet.

"Are you okay?" I ask as I sit by her hip.

"Whaa…?" She looks at me through hooded eyes; confusion is clearly written across her face.

"I think you fainted." I say as I rub her leg through the comforter.

"Oh." She definitely seemed more alert now, albeit still disoriented.

"I think we should go to the hospital." I make an executive decision right then and there.

"What? No!" She sits straight up but quickly slumps back almost as fast as her eyes roll back in her head. I panic and debate whether I should call 911. In the end, I decide it will take too long; instead, I dress her and wrap her in a blanket. I carry her out to the car and buckle her in. When I climb into the driver's seat, I realize it's a miracle I managed to remember my keys. As I pull out of the driveway, Meredith starts to wake up again. She seems disoriented but otherwise neurologically stable. This time when I tell her we're going to the hospital she doesn't fight it.

* * *

I pull up to the walk-in ER entrance and hop out, promising Meredith I'll be back with a wheelchair. I'm lucky to be able to snag one from right beside the entrance. I transfer Meredith from the car to the chair and I lock the doors over my shoulder as I push her towards the ER.

The nurse looks surprised when I walk in pushing Meredith and demanding her to page Bailey. She stumbles for a second before picking up the phone while directing me to one of the beds. I wheel Meredith over but before I can move to help her out of the chair, she stands and climbs into the bed. I quickly discard the chair and sit beside Meredith's bed.

"How are you doing?" I ask as she tries to get comfortable in the bed.

"I'm okay." She seems mostly back to normal at this point, albeit tired. She's lying on her left side, facing me; one is hand tucked under her chin and her other hand is holding mine.

"Dr. Shepherd?" The nurse from earlier is now standing at the foot of the bed holding a clipboard. "Dr. Bailey says she'll be down as soon as she can, but in the meantime I need you to fill this out," She thrusts a clipboard at me, "and I need to do a preliminary exam on Dr. Grey." I take the clipboard from her and Meredith rolls onto her back, giving the nurse permission to do what she needs to do

I fill out all the paperwork and hand it back to the nurse who finishes examining Meredith and leaves, drawing the curtain behind her. Meredith and I spend the next half hour in relative silence. Meredith dozes intermittently, but in the hustle and bustle of the ER genuine sleep is impossible to achieve. Finally the curtain is pulled back and the stout form of Dr. Bailey is revealed.

"Didn't expect to see you back here till Friday." She drawls as she pulls the curtain closed behind her. She steps to the other side of the gurney and Meredith rolls onto her back to allow Bailey to examine her. Bailey reads the notes the nurse left before she puts the clipboard down and unwraps the stethoscope from her neck.

"So what happened?" Bailey asks as she puts the stethoscope to Meredith's chest.

"We had showered and I was helping her redress when she fainted in my arms." I tell her. "I brought her to the bedroom and lay her down but when she sat up she fainted again." Bailey nods empathetically while she continues examining Meredith.

"Was she standing when she fainted the first time?" Bailey asks as she removes a blood pressure cuff from Meredith's upper arm. Both Meredith and I nod. Bailey makes a few notes before she nods her head resolutely.

"I think her blood pressure dipped to low." Bailey concludes. "I'm going to send you up for a CT scan just to be sure though." I nod and breathe a sigh of relief. Low blood pressure is a common side effect of painkillers, which Meredith happens to be on a lot of. Bailey goes to schedule the CT and the nurse pops in to tell us that there's an opening in fifteen minutes.

Unsurprisingly, it's closer to thirty-five minutes when the orderlies show up to wheel Meredith up to radiology. I walk alongside the gurney and try to enter the room with Meredith but Bailey sends me one harsh glance and I'm shown to the waiting room. While waiting, the nurse gives me some more paperwork to fill out, nothing substantial, just insurance forms mostly. By the time I've handed everything back to the nurse, Meredith is out of CT and I'm being led to an exam room. Meredith is lying on the gurney and Bailey is there studying, what I assume are, Meredith's scans.

"Everything looks good." Bailey says turning from the scans to face us. "I think it's just your blood pressure being too low. I'll prescribe you a short term drug for that but I'm also going to lower your Percocet dosage a little too which should help." She pulls out her prescription pad and writes out both orders. She hands the sheet to me and signs off on Meredith's chart.

"You're free to go; I'll have an orderly come with a wheelchair." With that Bailey leaves. An orderly appears a moment later and leaves us a wheelchair. I help Meredith into it and once she's settled, we're off to the pharmacy. I pick up the prescription then head back to the car.

* * *

It feels like only a few seconds later we're pulling up to the house. I help Meredith up the walk and into the house. Instead of bringing her upstairs I settle her on the couch and give her the first doses of her new meds. After that, she falls asleep almost instantly; presumably, the pain meds knocked her flat. I take the time to order in food and clean up a bit in the kitchen. Meredith is still soundly asleep when the food arrives so I put it in the oven to keep it warm for later. It's only 5:30, a little too early for dinner anyways. I slink back into the living room and plop into in arm chair adjacent the couch Meredith is still sleeping on. I turn the TV on low volume and begin watching some sort of cooking show. It's rather boring but I must be somewhat interesting because the next thing I know there is a warm body curling into my arms. Meredith wraps her arms around my neck and nuzzles her nose into my shoulder. I wrap my arm around her midsection and kiss her temple.

"What're we watching?" She mumbles.

"Some sort of cooking show." I say.

"Do we have any sort of real food?" She asks.

"I ordered Italian." I tell her. "Do you want it now?" She nods. I wiggle out from under her. I head to the kitchen and reheat the takeout. When I return Meredith has shifted to the couch. I sit next to her and hand her the food. We eat in silence. When we're finished, I turn the TV back on and Meredith curls into my side.

"I love you." I whisper. She answers me with a loud snore.

* * *

 **AN: Yeah I got sick of writing goopy fluff. I think this is a good compromise. Tell me what you think in the reviews. Thanks for all the reviews on the last chapter. Keep up the good work and I'll see you all next week!**


	14. Day 13

**Day 13**

Meredith sleeps until almost noon. The events of the day before coupled with new medication appear to have exhausted her. While she sleeps I work a little. I mostly do research and answer emails, although I do schedule a few consults. I do it all from my bed, in my pajamas, and I have to admit it's kind of nice. Eventually Meredith stirs beside me.

"Good morning." I smile at Meredith. She squints up at me with pursed lips. I run my fingers through her hair and let her adjust to being awake.

She rubs her eyes and blinks a few times. "Hey." She mumbles her voice still gravelly and full of sleep.

"Good morning" I repeat. She just moans in protest and I begin to think something more than her loathe of mornings is making her grumpy. "Are you okay?"

She groans. "Nooo. My stomach hurts and my incision itches and I have to pee but I don't think I can move because it hurts…" Her voice trails off into another sound of misery. I ache for her because she's just woken up and already she's miserable.

"How about this," I begin, "I'll help you to the bathroom then I'll go make you a quick breakfast so you can take your meds then you can curl up in a ball and go to sleep." She doesn't say anything but instead nods. I climb out of bed before I pick her up like a baby and carry her into our bathroom. I set her down in front of the toilet and help her sit. I want to turn away to give her some privacy but she grabs my hand and holds on tight. I still turn my head, but I squeeze her hand in support. Her sniffles and quiet tears tear me up. I want to drive her back to the hospital and demand a morphine drip. In all likelihood, her body is just having a rough time adjusting to the lower dose of pain medication. When she's done her business, I help her back to bed.

"On a scale of 1 to 10 how bad does it hurt?" I ask as she situates herself in a pile of pillows.

"Like an eight." She whimpers. She finally gets into a sort of comfortable position. From my point of view it looks rather awkward but I don't argue.

"I'll go make you breakfast so you can take your pills." I tell her. She nods and closes her eyes. "I'll be quick I promise."

True to my word, I'm back upstairs, with a bagel and cream cheese, no more than ten minutes later. Meredith's eyes are closed and she's breathing softly but the pinched expression on her face tells me she isn't asleep.

"Hey." I whisper. "I brought food." Meredith's eyes crack open but otherwise she makes no attempts to acknowledge me.

"You only need to eat a few bites." I bargain. "Then you can take you pills and go back to sleep." She shifts some and picks her head up.

"I can't…sit up." She croaks. "Hurts. Too much." I don't know what to do but during my silence she picks her head up again and an idea strikes me.

"Here," I say, while grabbing one of the remaining pillows, "pick your head up again." She complies and I stuff the pillow under her head so that her head is slightly elevated.

"I know it's probably not the most comfortable but it will work." I say when she scrunches her face in discomfort. I feed her a few bites of the bagel before I get her to swallow her pills with some apple juice. She eats the rest of her bagel and when she's done I remove the pillow from under her neck.

"Are you comfortable?" I ask. It feels like a dumb question.

"I think so." Meredith doesn't sound so sure. I move to the other side of the bed and lie down beside her. I grab her hand and intertwine her fingers with mine. Her eyes dip close.

"I'm sorry you don't feel well." I whisper.

"S'okay." She mumbles through the drug induced fog. I smile and lay with her until she's asleep. When I'm sure she's out cold, I roll over and grab my laptop. I sit up against the headboard. However, this time instead of doing work, I pull up Google. I start my search pretty simple: _dealing with post liver surgery pain._ A few different forums pop up and I peruse all of them. Some people complain of back pain while others complain of pulling around the incision. For the back pain, heat and simple stretches were recommended. For the incision pulling, ice and aloe were advised. No one specifically targets abdominal pain. The one thing I found that was close was a stomach ache and someone recommended lying on their right side. After some investigation I determine that whoever recommended it had most likely had surgery on their intestines and not their liver. I go back to Google and this time I'm a little more specific. This time I found an abundance of advice. Some people recommend light pressure others suggest rubbing the stomach. Some said ice and heat in a continuous cycle helped. There were a couple of positions that were recommended. I took notes on the notebook I had left on my bedside table. I'm anxious to try them but I didn't want to wake Meredith so I keep my excitement to myself.

* * *

By the time Meredith is stirring again I have a whole list of ideas. I give her some space while she wakes up but I feel like I'm jumping up and down with excitement. Within seconds the pinched expression of pain is written across her face and I feel relief knowing that I at least have an idea how to help.

"Hey." I whisper.

"Mmmm." She grumbles.

"Are you feeling any better?" I ask as I brush my hand over her cheek.

"No." She scowls and burrows back into her pillow.

"Can I try and help?" I ask.

"Go for it." She grumbles half-heartedly. I climb out bed and move to her side of the bed. I grab a pillow that's resting at her hip and she whimpers.

"That's. Not. Helping." She grits out.

"I know. I know," I placate, "can you bend your knee for me?" She obliges and I stuff the pillow under her hip again. She relaxes a little in the new position.

"Is that better?" I feel hopeful.

'Yeah, yeah it's okay." She sighs. I smile and move my hand to rest on her stomach. I press a little and she moans but not so much in pain but in relief. I rub in small circles, careful to avoid her incision and directly over her liver.

"Is that good?" It feels like an obvious question by the look of relief written across her face.

"Yeah. Don't stop." She breathes. I hadn't planned on it but it feels good knowing she's feeling better. Her breathing evens out and even after I'm sure she's fallen back to sleep I keep going. I only stop when my cell phone rings. I practically dive across the bed to shut the ringer off so it doesn't wake up Meredith.

"Hello?" I answer the phone. I leave the room and thus leave Meredith to her rest.

"Derek, hello." Dr. Bailey's voice crackles through the line.

"Miranda, hi." I say.

"I just wanted to call and check on Meredith after yesterday. How is she?" Bailey asks.

"She's in quite a bit of pain but otherwise okay." I reply honestly.

"Has she had anymore fainting spells?" Bailey sounds like she's taking notes.

"No. She's barely been able to stand up." I say. Bailey makes a humming noise on the other end of the line that sounds neither positive nor negative.

"Has her pain gotten any better throughout the day?" Bailey asks.

"After some internet searching, yeah a little." I shrug. Bailey hums again.

"Okay well I still want to see her on Friday for her one week checkup and if the pain is still bad then we can talk options." Bailey says. "Is that okay?"

"Yep."

"Okay, and 10 o'clock still works." Bailey confirms.

"Yes it's perfect." I say.

"Good then I'll see you both Friday."

"See you then." I say as I hang up. I check on Meredith quickly before I head downstairs. Having not been so absorbed in Meredith makes me realize how hungry I am. I whip myself a quick ham and cheese sandwich. I devour it in a mere minute. I also munch on an apple while I do the dishes and take out the trash. When I'm done, I grab a neurosurgical journal and head back upstairs. Instead of climbing back into bed, I sit in the armchair by the window. It's usually just a laundry collector but, once I clear it off, I find it quite comfortable. I sit and read my journal; occasionally I look up and check on Meredith. She sleeps peacefully and I couldn't be happier.

About an hour later Meredith begins to stir again. I sit ready with the painkillers and some water knowing full well she's going to be in need of another dose.

"Hey." She whispers groggily.

"Hey." I smile at her. "How are you feeling?"

"Still pretty sore but better than before." She sighs.

"You're due for another dose." I say, shaking the pill bottle. She wiggles herself into a sort of sitting position. I hand her the pills and the water and she swallows them quickly.

"Thanks." She says. She shifts a little and grimaces.

"Do you want to try changing positions?" I ask with concern.

"Yeah, my back is starting to hurt." She winces as if to add an exclamation point.

"Why don't you try sitting in the chair?" I suggest as I stand.

"M'kay." She shrugs. I start grabbing pillows and arranging them on the chair based on my earlier online searching. Meredith sits up some and watches me. When I finish, I step back and admire my work. I help Meredith ease out of bed and into the chair. I grab an extra blanket and lay it over her front, tucking the ends around her back.

"Is that okay." I ask.

"Mmm, yeah but," She wiggles her toes. "my feet are cold." I move to the dresser and pull out some socks for her. I kneel down in front of her and slide them over her feet, which, are like little ice cubes.

"Better?" I ask as I stand.

"Yeah." She mumbles. I take that as a sign to shut up so, to make myself feel productive, I move to stand behind the chair and I press my thumbs into her shoulder blades.

"Mmmm" She breathes. "That's nice." I keep going, moving my hands up and down her spine chasing away the tension that's built up over the past week and a half. Lying on your back almost 24/7 can start to become very uncomfortable after a certain point. After a while, it becomes clear that Meredith has fallen asleep so I stop my ministrations and instead move to slide a pillow under her head so her neck won't get sore. When I glance at my watch I'm surprised to find its quickly approaching six o'clock. I leave Meredith to sleep and head downstairs to make dinner. I figure now that she's feeling better the hunger might win over so she'll probably want something to eat. I decide on something that will be easy for the stomach: chicken noodle soup. I've combined all the ingredients and I'm stirring it all together when the doorbell rings. Curious, I head out into the main hall and open the door only to find Cristina Yang on the other side. I almost want to slam the door in her face and tell her to leave Meredith alone.

"Cristina, hi." I greet her but make no move to let her in.

"Are you going to let me in?" She doesn't miss a beat.

"Meredith's sleeping." I keep blocking the door with my body.

"So?" Cristina crosses her arms over her chest.

"So she's had a really bad day and I'd rather she stay asleep." Cristina sighs dramatically.

"Fine, but have her call me or something." She turns and leaves without even saying goodbye. I close the door and sigh in relief. I return to the kitchen and scoop the soup into two bowls. I head upstairs and I find Meredith awake and staring into space.

"Hey." I say setting the bowls on the end table.

"Hey." She mumbles.

"Cristina stopped by." I tell her.

"Oh, okay." She doesn't sound engaged at all.

"She wants you to call her."

"I… okay…I'll do it…sometime…later…" She trails off.

"Would you like some food before you return to Neptune or do you just want to go back to sleep?"

"…whaa?"

"Do you want to eat?" I lay it out simply.

"Mmmm" I assume that's a no.s.

"I love you Meredith." I kiss her temple and wish her luck on her trip back to Neptune.

* * *

 **AN: Hello valued reader. Thanks for returning for another installment of Meredith's recovery. I quite like this chapter. Just remember, there's good days and there's bad days and Meredith is just having a few bad days. Make sure you leave a review on your way out!**


	15. Day 14

**Day 14**

"Good morning." I smile as I enter the bedroom with a tray of breakfast for Meredith. She's sitting up in bed with a tired smile.

"You made me breakfast?" She asks in disbelief.

"I did." I say as I set the tray over her lap. "One artery clogging breakfast of pancakes and bacon just for you."

"I see you even snuck some strawberries in there." She smirks at me as she pops one in her mouth. I laugh as I plop beside her on the bed. I flip on the TV and we begin watching some terribly inaccurate medical show.

"Well that's not right." Meredith mumbles from beside me as the doctor on the screen reaches his diagnosis. "That guy clearly has a congenital defect."

"Maybe that's the idea. The doctor is wrong so the guy dies and it creates emotional turmoil." Meredith shrugs from beside me and shovels more pancakes into her mouth. We keep watching and as we near the end of the show it's obvious that my prediction is wrong.

"No way." Meredith gasps from beside me. "That's clearly congenital based on the ultrasounds. It couldn't have been an aneurysm."

"Maybe you should write the show and complain." I suggest. "You keep complaining about how much free time you have." Meredith smacks my arm and I feign hurt.

"What? It was a legitimate suggestion." I say

"Yeah but it reminded me how much free time I have." She pouts. I wrap my arm around her shoulder and pull her to me.

"It'll go by so quick and you'll be back at work in no time." I promise. "Until then I'll tape all my surgeries so we can watch them later so you don't go into withdrawal."

"Thank you." Meredith kisses me.

"And I'll be sure to get all the latest medical journals and some trashy magazines." I grin. "Plus all the junk food you could ever want."

"That sounds good." Meredith smiles back at me.

"You're every whim will be catered to my dear." I tease. She rolls her eyes at me. However I'm surprised when she sobers so quickly.

"Do you think…?" She bites her lip. "Do you think Mark could take a look at the scar?" Suddenly she seems very vulnerable.

"Why? Does it hurt?" I suddenly feel very concerned.

"No it's just…big and…it's right in the middle of my stomach." She stops meeting my eyes. "And the part where I ripped my stitches looks strange

I have to bite back the urge to say "So?" instead I ask, "I can ask him to take a look but I don't think it really matters." I try to act nonchalant but by the look in Meredith's eyes that isn't the way to go.

"Yes it does. It's huge and ugly and you'll have to look at it every time we…" She trails off.

"Meredith it really doesn't matter to me." I say bluntly. "I think you're beautiful no matter what." I force her to look at me. "I love you, you're looks are just a bonus." I cock my head and kiss her gently.

"Can you still talk to Mark? Please?" She begs.

"I will. In fact he's already mentioned it. But please, don't do this for me." I whisper. She nods and the subject is dropped.

"Did you ever call Cristina back last night?" I try to transition to the next subject.

"No. Was I supposed to?" She looks at me confused.

"Yeah she came by last night."

"She did?" Meredith looks even more baffled. "Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"I did. Clearly you were too high to remember." I snicker. She slaps me before leaning over and grabbing her phone.

"That's my cue to leave." I say as I stand from the bed. I leave the door slightly ajar as I head downstairs so Meredith can have her girl time.

* * *

When I head back upstairs to check on her, Meredith appears to have fallen asleep. Her phone is clutched in her hands so I gently pry it from her and place it back on the night stand. I tuck the blanket around her and leave her to rest. I head back downstairs and instead of pulling my book back out I open up my laptop and begin to do a little research. Instead of looking for home pain treatments, this time I look for tourist attractions in Seattle. Seeing as how tomorrow is my last day off I want to do something special with Meredith. However her current physical limitations make it kind of hard. After scrolling through countless suggestions of the same generic attractions, such as the Space Needle and Puget Sound, I decide to give up when the perfect thing catches my eye.

"Derek?" Meredith calls from the bedroom.

"Yes?" I call back.

"Can you come here for a second?" I quickly ascend the stairs and hurry down the hall to the bedroom.

"Yes?" I sit on the bed beside her.

"I dropped the remote can you grab it for me please?" She smiles sweetly and motions to the gap between the bed and her nightstand.

"Sure." I get down on my hands and knees; I sweep my hand across the floor until hit something solid. "Here you go." I hand her the remote.

"Thank you." She smiles at me.

"Do you need anything else?" I ask as I take my seat on the bed again.

"Can you help me take a shower later?" She asks.

"Sure, but after the last time, I'd feel better if you'd eat something first." I compromise.

"Can I get a BLT from that really good sandwich place near the docks?" She pouts a little for emphasis.

"Sure." I cave pretty easily. "I'll go place the order."

"Thank you." She smiles and kisses me lightly.

"Anything for you m'lady." I joke and bow.

"You dork." She smirks. I don't engage; instead, I head downstairs and order sandwiches. The delivery boy tells me he'll be half an hour tops so I head back upstairs to tell Meredith.

"Do you want to eat up here or downstairs?" I ask.

"Oh God downstairs please." Meredith says as she throws the covers back and tries to stand up. After some struggling, I offer my hand for leverage. Meredith stands and we meander down the hall. Well, Meredith hobbles and I do my best to match her pace. When we reach the stairs I pick her up and carry her to the bottom. As soon as my feet land on the first floor I let her down.

"Do you want to sit at the kitchen table or on the couch?" Meredith thinks for a second.

"Kitchen table but can you get me a pillow or two please?" I nod and head into the living room while Meredith heads to the kitchen. I grab a few comfortable looking throw pillows and hand them to Meredith. As I turn to grab drinks, the doorbell rings. I leave Meredith to get comfortable and answer the door. A delivery boy is standing on the other side. I exchange cash for our sandwiches before thanking the delivery boy and closing the door. I set the bag with the food on the table and return to the task of getting drinks. I can hear Meredith shuffling around but I'm surprised when I turn around and see she has already unwrapped her sandwich and is prepared to take her first bite.

"Wow you must be hungry." I blurt.

"Mhmmm." She mumbles around a mouthful of her sandwich.

"That's good it means your appetite is returning." I know she knows that but I say it anyways. Meredith nods and takes another bite of her sandwich. We eat and we chat and it's nice to be able to end the conversation because we want to not because a page or an emergency is pulling us away. Eventually we retire to the living room. I sit against the arm of the couch and Meredith rests her head on my chest. She dozes for awhile and I read a magazine that I found on the coffee table.

"What're you reading? I jump slightly as Meredith's groggy voice cuts through the silence. I show her the cover and she nods against my chest.

"Can we go for a walk?" She blurts out unexpectedly. I'm surprised by her request and Meredith must mistake it for hesitation,

"Never mind it was a stupid idea." She shrugs and seems kind of defeated.

"No it's not." I argue as I sit up a little more. "We can go for a walk if you want. We can find a way."

"Well…I mean…not necessarily a walk. I'm just getting sick of the house." Meredith sighs exasperated. "I want to go outside or do something."

"We could go hang out on the porch swing if you want." I suggest.

"Okay." Meredith shrugs.

"Do you want to do something else?" I ask.

"No…I mean…no not really I just want to do SOMETHING you know?" She shrugs. "At least I get to go outside."

"We can bring some pillows out so you'll be more comfortable." I say. Meredith helps me collect pillows and we head outside. It's slightly overcast but the sky is dry; it's considered beautiful weather in Seattle. We set up pillows on the swing and sit down. Meredith pulls her legs up onto the swing and curls into my shoulder. Her breathing is soft against my neck and I think she's fallen asleep against my shoulder.

"Do you remember how this swing didn't use to swing?" She mumbles.

"Mhmm." I breathe against her hair.

"Thatcher fixed it." Her revelation takes me by surprise.

"Really, when?" I ask.

"Do you remember that dinner we had with Susan and Thatcher right before Susan died?" I shake my head. "When Thatcher confused an old picture of me for Molly." Suddenly it all comes rushing back to me.

"And Izzie blew a fuse." I say.

"Yup that's the one." Meredith nods against me. "Anyways, I guess when I was a kid I got my fingers caught in it a lot so he put a screw in it so it wouldn't swing."

"That's smart." I mentally catalogue the idea for when we have kids and if we ever get a swing seat.

"When they were leaving he stopped to look at it. I mentioned it didn't swing and he just…pulled the pin out." Meredith shrugs.

"Hmmm." I'm not really sure what to say. Meredith seems so nonchalant about it but I feel like something deeper is bothering her otherwise she wouldn't have brought it up.

"He must've cared at some point." _Bingo_ I think.

"I think he still cares now." I say softly.

"Then why did he leave?" It seems like a very black and white, right or wrong question but I have no answer for her. "Or at the very least," she continues her thought, "why didn't he take me with him?" I still don't have an answer for her.

"I don't know Mer, I don't know." I feel a couple tears soak through my t-shirt but I don't acknowledge them.

"My mother didn't want me." It's become more of a statement than a fact at this point.

"I'm sorry." It doesn't feel like enough but I don't know what else to say.

"I just wish he'd give me a straightforward answer." She mumbles dejectedly.

"I hate to break it to you but the only way you're going to get that is by talking to him." I say apologetically.

"I know." Meredith pouts. I don't say anything. I run my hand in lazy circles around her back while I push the swing back and forth with my foot. Meredith sniffles some and wipes her eyes.

"It's a nice day out." Meredith observes.

"Don't get used to it." I warn.

"I know, believe me." She rolls her eyes.

"Winter is coming." I say in a mock caveman voice. Meredith chuckles. I'm about to say something but I'm cut off by the roar of a motorcycle. I'm surprised when the motorcycle pulls into our driveway. It all makes sense when the rider dismounts and pulls off her helmet revealing a mane of curly dark hair. Cristina walks over to us and plops down beside Meredith.

"Why are you guys out here?" She doesn't even bother with a hello.

"Needed a change of scenery." Meredith doesn't seem fazed by Cristina's bluntness. Instead of trying to become part of the conversation, I excuse myself to go make dinner.

"You're welcome to stay Cristina." I offer. She nods then goes back to chatting with Meredith.

* * *

I make spaghetti and meatballs for dinner and it goes off without a hitch. Cristina stays and we talk mostly about the hospital. Cristina fills us in on all the gossip we've been missing. She leaves around 8:30 when she notices Meredith is about to fall over with exhaustion. In the time it takes me to get Meredith upstairs she's already fallen asleep.

"Goodnight Meredith I love you."

* * *

 **AN: Guess who's back, back again, PK's back tell a friend. Seriously tell a friend I think it's a good story. I appreciate you reading though :). Don't forget to leave a review on the way out!**


	16. Day 15

**Day 15**

I wake at 6:30 in a vain attempt to get back to a normal schedule for when I get back to work. Ironically I'm not expected to be on shift until noon tomorrow. It gives me enough time to bring Meredith to her appointment then bring her home. I head downstairs and pour myself some cereal. While I read the paper I finalize the details of my plan to get Meredith out of the house in my head. I go about the morning routine I've developed over the past few days. I unload the dishwasher, do the dishes and take out the trash. Finally, I climb back into bed next to Meredith who is still sound asleep. She's lying on her side with her hair splayed across her face. She's snoring softly and I can't help but watch her. Her breathing picks up and little and she sniffles in her sleep. I can tell she's about to wake up but I can't bring myself to look away.

"Are you watching me sleep again?" She mumbles before her eyes are even open.

"Maybe." I smile. She opens her eyes and brushes the hair out of her face.

"You haven't done that in a while." She observes.

"No I just haven't gotten caught in a while." I joke.

"Creep." She grumbles. She throws back the covers and sits up. She stretches a little before she places her feet on the ground and stands up.

"Where are you going?" I ask.

"To the bathroom," She says,"with the door closed." She walks across the hall and makes a show of slamming the door.

"How unfair." I yell through the closed door. I hear Meredith giggle through the door. She finishes her business and comes back to sit next to me on the bed.

"So." I begin.

"So." Meredith mimics.

"So I have an idea…" I start again. Meredith quirks her eyebrow to show she's listening. "I was thinking we could go down the street to the park and have a picnic."

"Okay…" Meredith bites her lip in hesitation.

"I know it might be a lot to ask and it's totally up to you but I think it would be good to get out before I go back to work." I squeeze her shoulder gently.

"I want to." She sighs. "I just don't know if I'm up to it."

"Well it's just two blocks so we'd take the car and you wouldn't have to wear seatbelt if it's too uncomfortable. We don't have to stay long. You could even fall asleep and I'd just carry you home." I smile charmingly at her.

"I…okay." She shrugs.

"Okay." I parrot.

"When are we going?" She asks.

"I don't know when do you wanna go?" I refute. "It's about ten of eleven."

"How about we go as soon as possible because I'm feeling pretty good right now." She suggests.

"Okay." I smile. "Do you need help getting dressed?"

"No." She shakes her head.

"I'll go make some food then." I say. I leave Meredith to get ready and head downstairs. I slap together a ham and cheese sandwich for myself and a BLT for Meredith. I pack granola bars and yogurt for both of us. I grab Meredith some cookies too. I also grab water bottles, napkins and plastic cutlery. I make sure to pack Meredith's pills and an ice pack just in case. I load the bag into the car along with a blanket and some pillows. After that I head back up to check on Meredith. I find her sitting in the chair by the window wearing a pair of stretch paints and a long sleeved t-shirt.

"You ready to go?" I ask.

"Yep." She says pulling herself out of the chair. We walk down the hall; when we get to the stairs I pick Meredith up and carry her down the stairs.

"You okay?" I ask as I set her down.

"Yeah." She breathes. I lead her to the couch and help her put her shoes on. I usher her out the door and help her into the car.

"Are you comfortable?" I ask once she's settled. She did actually opt to wear a seatbelt but pressed a pillow to her side before pulling the belt over it.

"Yeah." She says as she leans back against the seat. "I'm good." I gently shut the door and head over to the driver's side.

"And we're off." I say as I put the car in reverse.

The park is not very crowded at all; presumably, all the kids who play at it are at school. I find a parking spot close to the field. I turn off the car and hop out. When I get to the other side of the car, Meredith has already unbuckled and opened her door. I help her ease out of the car by her elbow then guide her to lean on the side of the car. I pop the trunk and begin pulling various items from the car. It becomes evident that I'll probably need to make two trips when Meredith speaks up.

"Derek let me take something." She demands as she shifts her weight from leaning against the car to standing on her own.

"No I got it." I argue even though I clearly can't juggle everything.

"Derek, seriously." Meredith sighs and rolls her eyes. Despite my protests, she reaches over and grabs the pillows and the blankets from me.

"See?" She says. "I won't break I promise." She shifts her load so she's a little more comfortable. I grab the rest of our gear and slam the trunk. We walk over to the field as I lock the car over my shoulder. Meredith finds a nice shady tree so we set up shop under it.

"This is nice." She says as she leans back against the tree trunk. She put a pillow to support her back and another pillow by her hip.

"It is." I agree as I unpack our lunches. I hand her the sandwich I made for her earlier then I sit back against the tree beside her. She tips her head onto my shoulder as she takes a huge bite out of her sandwich.

"Thank you for suggesting it." She nuzzles my shoulder with her nose before going back to her sandwich

"You're welcome." We eat in relative silence as we bask in the nice weather.

"Do you think you'll be okay by yourself after I go back to work?" I ask as we finish eating.

"Yeah." She says. "I think so. I'll probably just be really bored." She shrugs. "Besides it isn't like you'll be really far away. I mean, I'm almost counting on you coming home for lunch or sending one of my friends over." She read me like a book because that's exactly what I planned on doing. In fact I'd even worked out a tentative schedule.

"You're sure? I have more time off if you want me to stay." I offer. Honestly I don't love the idea of leaving her by herself for such long periods right now.

"I'll be fine." She dismisses with a wave of her hand.

"If you're sure…" I shrug. She leans over kisses me full on the lips.

"I'm sure." She whispers. She smiles reassuringly and rests her against my shoulder. We sit quietly for a few minutes until something catches Meredith's eye.

"Ice cream!" She exclaims pointing at a nearby stand. "Can you get me some? Please?" She reminds of a little kid and much like my nieces and nephews I can't say no.

"Sure." I say, standing. "What flavor do you want?

"Strawberry." She gives me a look that practically screams, "duh." I walk over to the cart and purchase the ice cream for Meredith and a Popsicle for myself. I hand the guy a five and tell him to keep the change. I head back over to Meredith who is very eager for her ice cream.

"I packed cookies for you too." I say. She dismisses my statement with a wave and gets to work on her ice cream cone. We eat in silence while we enjoy what's left of our outing. I can tell Meredith's energy is dwindling fast despite her trying to hide it.

"Are you ready to go?" I ask after we've finished our treats.

"Yeah." Meredith sighs. I pack up our stuff as much as I can without disturbing her from her resting place. Eventually though, all that's left is the blanket and the pillows.

"I need you to stand up." I say regretfully. I hold out my hand and she takes it. I help pull her up but the twisted groan that falls from her lips puts a lump in my throat. I pull her to me and let her lean against me for a moment. When I'm sure she isn't going to collapse, I quickly fold up the blanket and grab the pillows. I hand them to Meredith reluctantly but she makes no comment or protest. I lead us back to the car albeit at a slower pace than when we were walking to our picnic spot. I help Meredith into the car and this time she opts out of the seatbelt.

"You ready?" I ask as I climb into the driver's seat. She nods and I back out of the parking spot.

By the time we've traveled the two blocks back to the house Meredith has fallen asleep. I carry her into the house and tuck her in on the couch. While she sleeps I carry all the stuff back into the house. I unpack all the stuff we didn't use. I quickly get Meredith to wake enough to take her meds. She falls back asleep quickly but not before she confirms that she's fine on the couch. Left to the quiet of the house I decide that the laundry needs to be done. I'm done sorting through all of it and about to put the first load in the washer when the doorbell rings. I want to curse whoever's at the door and I pray they didn't wake Meredith. I open the door to find Callie Torres on the other side holding grocery bags.

"Callie, hey." I say.

"Hey." She says. "I brought groceries." She shrugs as if to emphasize the bags she's holding.

"I see that." I say stepping aside to let her in. She walks into the foyer. "Meredith's sleeping." I whisper jerking my thumb in the direction of the living room. Callie nods and does her best to keep quiet. When we get to the kitchen, Callie sets the bags on the counter.

"Thanks for bringing these over." I say.

"No problem." She shrugs. "I was talking to Mark and I figured you guys might need them." She starts pulling things from bags as well. "You know it's funny, I did something like this after Denny Duquette died and Izzie wouldn't get off the bathroom floor." She smiles to herself. "We were sitting Shiva for him." I remember that day clearly. I had been quarantined with George and it was when I realized I had never told Meredith I loved her. When we'd finally been cleared to go I'd rushed over to what is now our home and told Meredith what she meant to me. Looking back, I might have laid it on a little too thick.

"I remember that." I say. "O'Malley and I were quarantined that day." Callie smiles at the memory.

"So um, I actually came over because I need a little bit of a favor." She looks at me sheepishly.

"Ah I see, the groceries were to butter me up." I joke. "Sure what do you need?" I ask.

"You're coming back tomorrow right?" She asks and I see where this is going.

"Yeah." I say warily.

"I know you're still off but I also know tomorrow you're probably going to be swamped by consults and paperwork and stuff." She takes a breath. "But I have this patient. She's a little girl who got hit by a car and shattered her tibia and fibula. I pieced her leg back together but she still can't feel anything. All her scans are clear as far as I can tell. Can you please find time to look at her?" Callie is practically on her knees begging me. I sigh.

"Yeah I'll look at her first thing." I say. "I'm not making any promises I'll be able to follow through though."

"Just look that's all I'm asking." Callie looks practically giddy. I nod and she squeals a little. "Thank you Derek." I nod at her enthusiasm.

"No problem." I say.

"Well I'd love to stay longer but I have to get going." Callie says, collecting all her stuff.

"Alright well thanks for stopping by." I say as I show her out. I hear her car leave the driveway as I head into the living room to check on Meredith. I find her a half-awake state, staring off into space.

"Hey." I say as I sit down by her hip.

"Hey." She mumbles. "Who was here?"

"Callie." I say. "She brought groceries."

"Okay." She whispers. "Can you take me upstairs now?" I nod and slide my arms under her. I carry her upstairs and help her change back into pajamas.

"Do you want dinner?" I ask. She nods against the pillow. I go downstairs and whip together something special. When I return upstairs with Meredith's dinner, she lights up.

"Ice cream for dinner!?" She looks up at me with wide eyes and I nod in confirmation.

"I love you." She says as she scoops her first bite into her mouth.

"I love you too." I say settling beside her.

* * *

 **AN: I forgot yesterday was Friday -_-. My bad. So here's the next chapter. It's cute but it's kind of filler fluff. Let me know what you think in the reviews and feel free to berate me for forgetting the day of the week. I promise I'll do better next week.**


	17. Day 16

**Day 16**

I awoke at 6:30 again. However, today will be the last time I complete the morning routine I've built over the last few days. I make myself breakfast and do the dishes before I make breakfast for Meredith. It's only 7:30 but I want Meredith to have enough time to eat and get ready for her appointment.

"Good morning." I say softly as I enter our bedroom with a tray of breakfast for Meredith.

"Mmmmm." Meredith groans as she rolls onto her back and throws her arm over her eyes.

"I'm sorry but we have to be at the hospital for ten." I remind her. It takes a few more minutes of coaxing before she actually sits up and starts eating. When she's done I help her take a quick shower and get dressed. She doesn't bother trying to look nice, instead she opts for sweatpants and a long sleeved t-shirt. I quickly change into jeans and a button down with a sweater thrown over top. I'm a little surprised when we're actually backing out of the driveway at 9:30; I was expecting Meredith to need more time to rest than she actually did.

* * *

We make it to the hospital and Meredith refuses a wheelchair before I can even suggest it. We head up to the surgical floor where I check in with the nurse and Meredith makes herself comfortable in the waiting room. A few minutes later a different nurse call for Meredith and she leads us to an exam room. She takes Meredith's vitals, weighs her, and instructs her to provide a urine sample. When all is said and done, she tells us Dr. Bailey will be in shortly. Meredith tries to make herself as comfortable as possible on the tiny, hard exam table.

"Are you nervous?" I ask.

"Not really." She shrugs. "Everything seems normal and the passing out has stopped so I should be fine." She sounds very relaxed but I'm a nervous wreck. I keep thinking about all the what ifs and the worst case scenario.

"Are you nervous?" Her question breaks my train of fearful thought.

"No." I stutter unconvincingly.

"Seriously Derek I'm fine; I feel fine." She reaches out and squeezes my hand.

"I know, it's just my irrational doctor side." I confess. She nods in understanding. Before either of us can say anything else, the door opens and Bailey struts in carrying Meredith's chart.

"Good morning." She says politely.

"Morning Dr. Bailey." I say cheerfully. Bailey sits down on the rolling stool and pulls out a pen.

"How're you feeling Grey?" She asks as she opens the chart and makes a few quick note.

"Pretty good all things considered." Meredith says.

"Any nausea, vomiting or diarrhea?" Bailey asks. Meredith shakes her head and Bailey makes a note.

"How has the pain been?" Bailey looks at Meredith again.

"Bearable." Meredith answers.

"She had a really bad day her first full day home and three days ago." I interject.

"That's to be expected." Bailey says. "If I'm not mistaken four days ago was the fainting incident.' She states with a hint of question in her voice.

"It hasn't happened again." Meredith says.

"Glad to hear it." Bailey smiles as she makes another note in the chart. "Do you have any concerns you'd like to share with me?' Meredith and I shake our heads simultaneously.

"Good," Bailey says as she stands. "Grey, I'm just going to feel your abdomen and check your incision then you should be good to go."

"Did you talk to Mark?" Meredith asks as she pulls her shirt up.

"No, I forgot." I say apologetically. "I can see if he's available now though."

"He's not on the board." Bailey offers helpfully as she begins to feel around Meredith's stomach.

"I'll be right back." I tell Meredith with a squeeze of her hand. She nods and I step outside to ask a nurse to page Dr. Sloan. Mark round the corner no more than two minutes later looking surprised to see me.

"Hey man." He says. "I thought you weren't on til noon?"

"Meredith has her weekly checkup." I explain. "Actually that's why I paged you. Meredith wants you to take a look at her scar." Mark nods and I lead him into the exam room. Meredith is sitting up and adjusting her shirt while Bailey throws away her gloves.

"You found him." Meredith says which causes Dr. Bailey to look up.

"Ah Dr. Sloan I just finished so she's all yours." Bailey signs off on the chart and hands it off to Mark. "Grey make sure you schedule an appointment for three weeks and remember: you can do a little bit but don't push yourself and don't forget to rest." Meredith nods obediently and Bailey leaves.

"Alrighty Grey I'm gonna need you to lie back down and lift your shirt again." Mark instructs. Meredith obliges while I grab her hand and move to stand by her head. Mark snaps on a pair of gloves and starts poking around. Meredith makes a face that says she's not in pain but she isn't exactly comfortable. I squeeze her hand and she squeezes back but she gasps when Mark hits a particularly sore spot.

"Sorry." Mark apologizes. He pokes around a tiny bit more before he straightens up and pulls off his gloves.

"So," He begins. "I can't tell much as of right now because the scar is so fresh. However, I think Bailey did a good job initially so the scar should heal relatively normal. The only thing, right now, that I think would be beneficial is a scar tissue reduction around the area where you ripped your stitches. It would be a quick outpatient procedure and you'd only need minimal sedation. Right now though I don't think it's a good idea. I'd like to reevaluate when you come back in a few weeks." Meredith nods along to everything he's saying and she doesn't seem to disappointed by what he's saying.

"Okay." She finally says. "Thank you Mark."

"Any time Grey." Mark smiles as he signs off on the chart. "I'll see you guys later." With that he disappears down the hall."

"Ready to go home?" I ask as I help Meredith sit up.

"Yeah." She suddenly seems very tired. "But we have to make another appointment first." She hops down from the table with relative ease. I make the appointment before we head back to the car. She still refuses a wheelchair but the walk down is considerably slower than the walk up. We finally make it back to the car and I practically have to lift Meredith into the passenger seat. Once she's settled and comfortable I rush over to the driver's side and get in. I start the car and pull out of the hospital parking lot. I want to get Meredith home as quick as possible so she can be comfortable. Usually when she moves around a lot is when the pain flares up. We make it home in record time and I carry Meredith into the house. She's already snoring softly by the time I tuck her into bed. I have about half an hour to get everything together before I have to leave for my shift. I first make Meredith a sandwich for lunch and grab two water bottles. I set them on the nightstand and set the alarm to go off when she is due for a dose. I stack up a bunch of movies and books along with markers and the adult coloring book I found on Amazon a few days ago. I place a change of clothes on my side of the bed in case she decides she wants to change and I put her cellphone on the nightstand so it's within arm's reach. Finally, I wake her to tell her I'm leaving.

"Meredith." I whisper as I rub her cheek gently.

"Hmmm?" She mumbles groggily.

"I'm leaving to go to work." I tell her.

"Kayyyy." She buries her face deeper into her pillow.

"Are you sure you don't want me to see if I can find someone to stay with you?"

"Mhmmmm." She mumbles.

"Your phone is on the nightstand and so are your pills. I set the alarm for when your next dose is. Call me if you need anything." I say.

"Mmmmm love ya." She whispers as she falls back to sleep.

"I love you." I say. "I'll be back around 6:30." Her only reply is a soft snore. I peck her cheek and reluctantly head to work.

* * *

Miraculously I make it to the hospital in time for my shift.

"Hey man." Mark says as he enters the Attendings Lounge. "How's Grey?"

"Sound asleep." I say as I pull my jacket over my scrubs and clip my pager to my waistband.

"But you're still worrying like hell aren't you?" Mark guesses. I sigh and nod knowing there's no point in denying it.

"She should be fine." I reason. "I mean she'll probably just sleep most of the time I'm gone."

"Doesn't stop the worrying." Mark states. I shake my head. Suddenly both our pagers blare.

"The pit." We say simultaneously.

The pit is crowded with victims of multi-car pileup. My patient is more worried about his car than himself and it's very frustrating.

"My car. It's a 66' Ford Mustang. Where is she? I she okay?" He asks as he fights me to get up.

"Sir I need you lie back so I can examine you. Once I've cleared you, you can talk to the police about the car." I try and placate him to no avail.

"No I need to find my car!" As he says that he forces me off him. As soon as he stands he collapses and I just barely catch him.

"Call up to CT." I order. "Tell them it's emergent." A nurse helps me get him back onto a gurney and they rush him up to CT.

I barely have to study the CT scans. There is an obvious hematoma in his frontal lobe. The CT tech books me an OR while I make a plan of action with my resident. The resident is a Mercy Wester I have yet to meet but appears to be very competent. Once the plan is established I excuse myself to call Meredith, instructing the resident to page me when the OR is ready. I head into an on call room and lock the door behind me before I pull out my phone and dial Meredith's number.

"Mmmmm lo?" Meredith's sleepy voice greets me from the other end of the line.

"Hi." I say quietly.

"Hey." She says. "Whassup."

"I just wanted to check on you before I go into surgery." I say.

"What kind of surgery?" She asks, sounding more awake.

"Just a craniotomy on a car accident victim." I say. "It's pretty minor."

"Oh." She sounds disappointed. "Do you have anything else today?"

"No I was just supposed to do paperwork and be available for consults." I say. "I might be home late though."

"Okay." She sighs again. "I'm gonna go back to sleep."

"Okay." I say softly. "I love you."

"Love you." She mumbles groggily. I hang up and slide my phone back into its clip. I sigh and let myself out of the on call room and back into the hall. My pager blares telling me that my OR is ready.

* * *

I leave the OR at quarter after five. I don't have any more surgeries to do but I can picture the mountain of paper work that's waiting for me in my office. I instruct my resident on post-op care and leave her to monitor my patient. I also manage to track down a police officer who is able to tell me the patient's car is damaged but not beyond repair; I make sure the resident passes on the information. I sigh as I enter my office and find three stacks of paperwork on top of my desk. I really just want to go home but I can't. I sit down and pull the first stack towards myself. The first item a department budget report. I sigh again as I start putting the pen to paper and taking notes.

When it's finally six o'clock, I pack everything up. I manage to get through the first stack but now I'm so sick of budget reports and research proposals. Despite this I bring some home figuring I can do some work while Meredith sleeps. I send her a quick text telling her I'm on my way home and that I'll pick up Thai food for dinner.

"Meredith?" I call softly as I enter the house. I'm not surprised when there's no answer. I kick of my shoes and shed my jacket before I head upstairs. Meredith is asleep in the armchair with a book held loosely in her grasp. I pull the book from her hands and mark the page before setting it on the nightstand.

"Meredith." I say again.

"M'awake." She mumbles and I chuckle.

"No I don't think you are." She rubs her eyes and sits forward.

"Well I meant to be." She grumbles. "I was trying to read Anna Karenina." I nod knowing just how boring that book can be.

"I have food. Do you want to eat up here or downstairs?" I ask.

"Downstairs." She says standing and stretching. I follow her down the hall and when we reach the stairs I move to pick her up but she holds her hand up to stop me.

"Bailey said stairs are okay." She says as she makes her slow descent. I follow behind her and watch like a hawk. When she makes it to the bottom, she turns and give me a self-satisfied smirk. I ignore the jab at my ego and instead lead her to the kitchen.

"What else did Bailey say?" I ask.

"She cleared me to walk around a little. I can do a chore if I feel like it but I still can't lift over five pounds." She shrugs. "She basically told me to start being active again but don't overdo it."

"That's good." I say and she nods. "How was the rest of your day?" I ask.

"Good. I mostly slept." She says.

"I missed you today." She rolls her eyes. "What? I love you; being away from you makes me miss you."

"I love you too." She smiles although I swear I hear her mumble "cheesy" under her breath.

* * *

 **AN: Hey this update is a little early in the day for me isn't it? Yeah it is but I'm leaving in a bit and I won't be home until Sunday so I'm doing this now. I hop you all enjoy this chapter as much as I did writing it. Leave your feedback in the reviews and I'll catch up with y'all next week.**


	18. Day 17

**Day 17**

I unfortunately have to work the seven to five shift today. I have one surgery and a few consults as well as being on call for the pit. I don't really want to leave Meredith alone for so long but I appear to have no choice.

"Mhmm." Meredith mumbles sleepily as I gently rub her arm.

"Are you sure you don't need anything?" I ask for the umpteenth time.

"Cereal." She whispers.

"I already got you that." I remind her.

"Then I'm good." She sighs and burrows back into her pillow.

"You sure?" I ask.

"Mhmmmm." She sighs exasperatedly.

"I'll come back for lunch and you can call me if you need anything okay?" I say

"M'kay." She mumbles

"I love you." I say as I peck her on the cheek. "I'll see you later, don't do anything you shouldn't." I don't get a reply as I leave the room and let her sleep.

* * *

My morning is pretty uneventful. I only have two consults and the pit is quiet. This is a blessing and a curse because it gives me more free time to catch up on paperwork but it also gives me free time to worry about Meredith. Unfortunately, the latter issue is winning out as I send her a third text in an hour. She has yet to reply to any of them; it's probably because it's only nine and she's still sleeping. Nevertheless, I still worry. I put my phone down and scrub my face in attempts to refocus. I pull another piece of paperwork in front of me and half-heartedly make notes on it. I go on like this for fifteen minutes before my phone vibrates. I practically pounce on it.

" _Still alive, just woke up, eating cereal."_ The text from Meredith reads. I smirk a little and send back my own reply.

" _Glad to hear it. I love you."_ I place my phone back on its clip on my waistband and stand. It seems now is a good time for a coffee break.

I take the elevator to the lobby and get my coffee at the cart. As I buy my coffee Cristina Yang halts beside me and spits her order at the barista before turning to me.

"How's Meredith?" She asks.

"She's good." I say. "Still alive." Cristina looks unamused by my joke.

"She better be alive McDreamy." She threatens. I hold my hands up in mock surrender.

"She's home. You can go see for yourself that she is alive." I say. Cristina's expression remains relatively neutral but her eyes light up at the mention of seeing Meredith.

"She won't mind?" Cristina asks with barely concealed excitement.

"Not at all. She's bored out of her mind." I say.

"Oh." Cristina says. "Last time I was there she seemed…unenthusiastic."

"She was stoned." I say. "She still sleeps a lot and you'd have to wake her at your own risk but she's been tapering on the meds so she's alert when she's awake.:

"Cool." Cristina's demeanor hardens again. "I'm off at noon, I'll go over after."

"Okay." I say to her retreating back. I check my watch; it says 10:12. I have surgery at eleven so I figure I won't be able to leave until at least 2:30. That should give Meredith and Cristina time to catch up. I sip my coffee as I head to check on my patient.

After my resident caught me up and I checked on my patient myself, the OR is prepped and the patient is brought down. I watch the anesthesiologist put him under as I scrub in.

"Nurse can we tape the surgery?" I ask remembering my promise to Meredith.

"Sure Dr. Shepherd." She says confusedly. I just nod my thanks and step up to the head of the table.

"It's a beautiful day to save lives everyone. Let's have some fun." I nod directly at the camera then make the first cut.

My surgery is successful and I manage to nab a copy of the tape for Meredith. As I stand at the nurse's station double checking the chart, I notice I have three missed texts.

 _"_ _I don't need a babysitter."_ It reads, followed by " _Never mind"_

The next one is much later and it says: _"Cristina left. Will you be home for lunch?"_

 _"_ _I will be, leaving right now, will pick up food."_ I type out before handing post-op to my resident before quickly heading to my office to pick up my wallet and my keys. While I'm doing that I place an order for takeout at a Mexican place that's on my way.

* * *

I make it home around three and I find Meredith sitting in bed doodling in a notebook.

"Hey." I say to catch her attention.

"Hey." She says looking up.

"I got Mexican." I say holding up the bag. Meredith smiles and sets her things aside. She shifts and throws the blankets back before reaching out for the food. I hand her the bag before sitting in the armchair. She grabs her meal and I grab mine. We eat in companionable silence.

"How's your day been." Meredith finally asks.

"It's been good." I say. "Pretty quiet. I had two consults and a successful surgery."

"Careful don't jinx yourself." Meredith warns jokingly. I smile.

"I recorded the surgery for you." I say. "The tape is downstairs. I'll get it before I leave."

"Or I could get it." Meredith shrugs. "Bailey said stairs are okay and I'm feeling pretty good today."

"Nah I'll just get it." I say, trying to hide the fact that the idea of her walking downstairs by herself freaks me out.

"You just don't want me going downstairs by myself." She reads me like a book. I smile guiltily and shrug. She rolls her eyes but doesn't say anything else on the matter. I notice she's finished eating so I take her trash and head downstairs to dispose of it. I come back up with the disc with the surgery on it and hand it to Meredith.

"Oh so I'm okay to walk across the room?" She teases.

"Hey for all I know you were watching something. I don't want to mess that up." I tease back.

"I wasn't and you can just put it in." She hands the tape back to me. I oblige.

"I have to go." I say. "I love you."

"Love you too." She says as she reaches for the remote.

* * *

I make it back to the hospital just in time for my next and final consult. As much as I want it to go quickly, so I can spend the rest of my shift in my office, the patient has other ideas. He's your typical grumpy old man who is skeptical of everything. The only difference is he has a cyst pressing on his optic nerve.

"Okay, Mr. Gunter." I say as I reenter the exam room with his MRI results. "There is definitely a benign cyst on your optic nerve. I think we should schedule the surgery sooner rather than later."

"No." Mr. Gunter says defiantly. "I don't want it."

"Harry…" His wife sighs from beside him. "Please?"

"No." He says again.

"Look I can't force you to do anything." I try to reason. "Now that you know all the facts I'll give you my information and you can make a decision and call me."

"No. Doctor Shepherd he'll have the surgery." Mrs. Gunter says.

"Damnit Laura I said no!" Mr. Gunter slams his fist on the exam table. Mrs. Gunter doesn't flinch but I'm a little nervous.

"I'll leave my contact information and I can give you a referral to a social worker who can help you go over the finer parts of the procedure. Why don't you go home and talk it out and you can call me when you make a decision? "I don't give them enough time to protest before scribbling down the necessary info and leaving the room. I hand the chart off to the nurse and breathe a sigh of relief when I check my watch. It's nearing four which means I can just head to my office and do paperwork while I pray no huge emergency enters the ER.

The ER Gods appear to be in my favor because at five o'clock sharp I'm able to pack up my things and head home to Meredith. I decide to cook tonight so I stop at the grocery store and pick up some pasta and ground beef among a few other things. When I get home I can see the faint glow of the TV from the upstairs window. I make my way inside and set my bounty on the counter before heading upstairs to Meredith. I find her lying horizontally across the bed, on her side, watching a surgical tape.

"Hey." I say as I enter the room.

"Hey." She says absentmindedly.

"Whatchya watching?" I ask as I drop into the armchair.

"Heart-liver transplant." She says tearing her attention away from the screen to look at me.

"Interesting." I say. "I'm cooking spaghetti and meatballs for dinner okay?"

"Sounds good." She says rolling onto her back. "Do you need any help?"

"No." I say. "But you can come down and keep me company if you want."

"Okay." Meredith says, getting up from the bed. She follows me downstairs and takes a seat at the kitchen table.

"How was the rest of your day?" She asks as I start cooking.

"It was…interesting." I say. "I had a particularly difficult consult case."

"How so?" Meredith asks.

"He doesn't want surgery but his wife wants him to have surgery." I say.

"That's rough." Meredith nods sympathetically.

"Yeah." I say. "Other than that though everything was pretty normal. I'm almost all caught up on paperwork."

"That's good." Meredith says.

"What about you? How was your day?" I ask.

"Pretty boring to be honest." She sighs. "I slept till like ten then I ate half a box of cereal. Cristina came over. You came home. I got through half your surgery tape before I fell asleep. I napped for like 3 hours then popped in the heart liver and that's when you came home."

"That sounds nice." I say. Meredith scoffs and rolls her eyes but doesn't retaliate.

"How was your surgery." She asks. "I never got a chance to ask earlier."

"It was good. A successful tumor removal." I nod.

"Shh, spoilers." Meredith jokes. I smile and turn back to check on the meatballs. They look perfect so I pull them out of the oven and set them down before checking on the noodles. They look perfect too so I split them evenly amongst bowls and give us each a couple meatballs. I pour on the sauce then walk to the table.

"Dinner is served." I say as I sit down at the table.

"Thank you." She says as she grabs her fork and digs in. The next few minutes are quiet as she devours her food. It's only a few moments later, after she's eaten half her serving, when she speaks up again.

"This is really good." She says wiping away the sauce mustache she has created in her frenzied eating.

"Good I'm glad." I say as I scoop a bite into my mouth. I'm barely a quarter of a way through my pasta. "Did I not leave you enough food to eat?" I half joke, half ask out of concern.

"Yes and no." She says. "I wouldn't have starved but I got sick of eating cereal so I just thought I'd wait till you got home." She shrugs. "I just need more variety I think." She shrugs and goes back to her food. I nod and start making a mental list of food I could pick up for her. I have the day off tomorrow and I need to go to the grocery store. I could get trail mix or chips. Some fresh fruit to balance things out.

"You're making a mental grocery list now aren't you?" She teases.

"I love you." I say instead of answering her question. She just smirks knowingly.

* * *

 **AN: HEYO! I'm back with a very cute chapter. It's fluffy but not overdone and a peek into the next phase of this story. Derek will definitely be having more days like this. Anywho I hope you enjoyed and please be sure to leave a review on the way out. Thanks a million and I'll see you next.**


	19. Day 18

**Day 18**

The beautiful thing about being a department head is that I'm in control of the schedule. On Sundays, no elective surgeries are scheduled, there only needs to be one or two surgeons on call for emergencies. At times, I can use my powers to make sure that I'm not on call on Sundays. I only use this power every once in a while, for example, if Meredith just had major abdominal surgery and I would rather be home with her. So I get up and make her breakfast assuming that she's already sick of cereal. It's a balanced breakfast consisting of an omelet, some bacon and a fresh orange. When I'm back upstairs, I find Meredith already awake.

"Good morning." I smile.

"Hey." She says sleepily as she pushes the hair back from her face.

"How are you feeling." I ask as I set the tray with her breakfast down in front of her.

"Pretty good actually." She says as she picks up her fork and digs in.

"That's good." I say as I climb back into bed beside her. "Since your feeling so well, is there anything in particular you want to do today?"

"Take a shower." She mumbles around a mouthful of omelet.

"That's it?" I ask.

"I just woke up; I haven't really thought that far ahead." She argues.

"Do you want to go watch the ferryboats?" I ask.

"Okay." Meredith says as she scarfs down another piece of bacon.

"Alright well I have to go grocery shopping but after we can go okay?" I start planning

"Sounds nice." Meredith says as she pushes her breakfast away. I pick up the tray and tell her I'll be right back.

* * *

About an hour later I'm cruising up and down the aisles of the grocery store looking for snacks for Meredith. I grab chips, various cereals, bananas, fruit snacks, cookies and Spaghetti O's. I remember in my college days I would eat Spaghetti O's out of the can without even heating them up. From what Meredith has told me, she probably did the same. I check out after adding a few more things to my cart for meals throughout the week. Back to the car, I load all the groceries in before texting Meredith and heading home.

When I get home I unload the groceries and head back upstairs. Meredith is watching something on TV.

"Hey." I say. Her head snaps towards me and she jumps a little. "Sorry didn't mean to scare you." I say as I hold up my hands in surrender.

"It's okay." She says. "Just give me a second to get my heart rate back under 100." I sit beside her on the bed and rub her leg through the blankets.

"So now that you can breathe again," I joke. "do you want to shower before or after we go out?"

"Before." She says. "I'll probably be too tired after."

"Okay." I say as I stand. Meredith climbs out of bed behind me. We head to the bathroom and strip. I climb into the shower and help Meredith in after me.

"Do we still have the ten-minute shower rule?" I ask.

"I don't know." She says.

"Then let's keep it just to be safe." I say as I start lathering Meredith's hair with shampoo. I rinse and repeat with conditioner before I help her wash her body while being mindful of her incision. When I'm finished, I help her out of the shower and she sits on the toilet seat while I finish showering. She manages to get herself dressed by the time I finish. I change myself before I help her change her bandage. At this point it's a piece of light gauze to prevent the incision from getting agitated by the rubbing of Meredith's shirt but it's still important to keep it clean.

"Why don't you rest for a few minutes while I pack lunch and stuff?" I suggest. Meredith nods in agreement and settles back into bed. I head back downstairs and begin packing a lunch for us. I make sandwiches and I grab sparkling grape juice as a wine substitute. I add some fruit and cookies as well as carrots and ranch. I pack them all into a cooler along with some ice packs just in case. I grab blankets and pillows so we can put the seats down in the back of my SUV and camp out back there. The first time we went, we reclined the seats in my car and slept there. It wasn't very comfortable. I load everything into the car before I head back inside to get Meredith.

"You ready?" I ask. Meredith nods and stands from the bed. I follow her downstairs and we grab our windbreakers to ward off the slight chill outside. I follow her out to the car; she needs help getting into the passenger seat. Once she's comfortably settled, I back out of the driveway.

* * *

The ride there is about half an hour. I back in so we can pop the hatch and camp out in the back. Meredith unbuckles but she stays in passenger seat while I set up. I put the back seats down and lay the blankets. I set the pillows up in a backrest-like fashion. I lay out all the food before I go back to the front to get Meredith.

"Do you want me to carry you or do you want to walk?" I ask.

"I can walk." Meredith insists. I help her gingerly slide from her seat and walk to the back of the car. I have to half hoist half support her into the back. She settles easily on top of a pile of pillows and begins picking through the food I've laid out. I climb in beside her. We eat quietly as we watch the ferries cross the harbor.

"Did you ever eat cold Spaghetti O's in college?" I ask out of the blue.

"What kind of question is that?" She looks at me sideways. "And yeah of course I did."

"I know it's random but I bought you Spaghetti O's today and was wondering if I could just leave them cold or if I should bring the microwave upstairs."

"Honestly I kind of prefer them cold." She shrugs as she takes a bite out of her sandwich. "My roommate thought it was weird."

"Yeah I'm kind of with the roommate on that one." I say as I dip a carrot in ranch. "That's weird."

"Hey, you're the one who bought the Spaghetti O's." She rolls her eyes at me. "You know what? I bet you ate them cold too." She accuses.

"I did but if I had the choice I'd eat them warm." I say

"You're no fun." She crosses her arms and pouts at me.

"What other crazy college concoctions did you eat?" I ask.

"A lot of tequila." Meredith nods. "Other than the Spaghetti O's not much. My mother paid for my education including a meal plan. The Spaghetti O's were just for when I got lazy or was in the middle of a huge study cram."

"I'm jealous." I say. "I lived off Top Ramen. Spaghetti O's were my splurge." Meredith smiles at me as she chews on her cookie.

"I hated the meal plan because my mother bought it." She admits. "Strangely enough I wanted to be buried in loans just so I could spite my mother."

"I went to pre-med on a half ride and I went to med school on two merit scholarships and I STILL didn't pay off my loans until I was a fellow." I say.

"Did you have a job in college?" She asks.

"Yeah I was an RA in pre-med and a lab tech in med school." I say.

"I was an orderly all eight years." She says shyly.

"That explains your respect for the underlings." I joke. Meredith smiles as she rests her head against my shoulder.

"Are you tired?" I ask. She sighs a little.

"Kind of. I don't want to leave yet though." She says. I nod and obey her wishes. I wrap my arm around her and we sit in silence as the ferries cross the harbor. It's picturesque, almost, with not a cloud in sight and no wind to ruin it. I sit back on the pillows and pull a blanket over Meredith and myself. I enjoy the quiet and Meredith's soft breathing against me. I decide it's time to leave when Meredith interrupts the silence with a loud snore.

* * *

We make it back to the house a little after three. Meredith is still asleep so I leave her on the couch instead of bringing her all the way upstairs. I unpack the car and put everything away before sitting in the seat across from Meredith with my laptop. I'll admit that I sit there and play solitaire for a good half an hour before I pull up Google and actually start doing some research. I work on case studies and new procedure research while Meredith snores away on the couch. Eventually though it's nearing six o'clock and I'm starting to get hungry again. I decide instead of trying to do anything special I'll just have cereal. I pour myself some Raisin Bran and head back to the living room to eat while Meredith still sleeps. I'm debating if I want to wake her for dinner or if I should just bring her up to bed when she makes the decision for me and starts to stir.

"Hey." I say softly as she opens her eyes.

"Mmm, hi." She mumbles into the pillow. "Cha'eatin?"

"Cereal." I say as I take another bite.

"Can I have some?" I have to smile because she sounds like a 5-year-old asking for ice cream.

"Sure." I say.

"None of the Muesli crap though." She calls after me. "I want like frosted flakes or something."

"Got it." I call over my shoulder. In the kitchen, I pour her a bowl of cinnamon Chex and add a generous amount of milk. When I return to the living room I find Meredith sitting up and rubbing her eyes.

"What time is it?" She asks when I hand her the cereal.

"About six." I say and drop back into my chair. She blinks at me surprised.

"Wow I was out for a while." She says as she digs into her cereal. "I still feel like I could sleep for a week."

"Today required a lot of energy." I offer as a consolation. "You're not in pain though right?"

"No more than usual." She shrugs. Her words don't ease the concern but I let it go.

"Do you want to go to bed then?" I ask.

"I don't know." She shrugs. She finishes off her cereal and sets the bowl down on the coffee table.

"Do you want to go upstairs and lie down just do see what happens?" I ask.

"Sure." Meredith says as she stands. I follow her upstairs. She changes and climbs into bed. I turn off the light and climb in behind her.

"Goodnight, I love you."

* * *

 **AN: This chapter was brought to you late by Comcast for having a huge outage on my upload day. Sorry about that folks. We now return to your regularly scheduled programming. Leave a review and tell me if you adore this chapter as much as I do. Thanks for your patience and I'll see y'all next week. (Hopefully on time)**


	20. Day 19

**Day 19**

When I arrive at the hospital at 7 o'clock Monday morning I find a very angry Callie Torres waiting for me at the coffee cart.

"Morning Dr. Torres." I say cheerfully. Despite that, she keeps scowling at me.

"You forgot." She states without even a hello.

"I forg- Oh crap." I say as I realize what she's talking about. "Your patient. How is she?" I fear the worst for this little girl.

"She seized last night." Callie informs me. "Weller ordered an MRI. I want you to look at it."

"Did Weller look at it?" I ask. Callie nods.

"He said there was something up in her M1 motor cortex but he didn't know what."

"Come find me after rounds." I instruct her as an idea forms in my head. I start walking towards the elevator, eager to get rounds over with.

* * *

My pager blares right after I've handed off the last assignment to the last resident. I meet Callie at the 3rd floor nurses' station. She doesn't say anything, she just hands me the chart and walks away; I assume she's headed to the patient's room. I follow her and sweep over the chart as we go. I feel slightly giddy when I look at the MRI and find what appears to be spinal fluid collecting around the M1 motor cortex.

"Mr. and Mrs. Bryant?" Callie calls as she enters the room. "This is Dr. Shepherd, he's our head of neurosurgery. I've asked him to take a look at Kaylee." Callie introduces me to two frazzled looking parents.

"Nice to meet you both." I say as I hold my hand out to shake theirs. "I think I have an idea as to what may be causing Kaylee's partial paralysis. However, I do need to run a few more tests to be sure."

"Whatever it takes doctor." Mrs. Bryant says as she smooths back her daughter's hair. Mr. Bryant nods solemnly beside his wife. I grab a roller from one of the neuro carts in the hallway.

"Okay Kaylee, I need you to close your eyes and tell me when you start to feel something." The little girl nods and closes her eyes. I roll the little tool up the leg that wasn't broken and stop at the top of her thigh when she quietly tells me she can feel it. I nod and make a few notes on the chart before I pull out my penlight and do a pupillary test.

"Okay." I say when I've finished the pupillary test. "I think I have a diagnosis but I need to run a spinal MRI first." I scribble the order into the chart and sign off on it.

"Will she be okay?" Mrs. Bryant asks.

"If it is what I think it is, then yes, she'll be just fine." I say reassuringly. I leave the room and head back to the nurses' station where I find Callie waiting for me.

"So?" She asks expectantly.

"I think she might have thrown a clot at some point and it's lodged in her spine." I say. "I have a request for a spinal MRI in so we should know by tonight."

"What about the spot in the M1 and the seizure?" Callie asks.

"Increased pressure on the spine can lead to excess spinal fluid in the brain which can lead to elevated ICP which can lead to seizures." I explain. Callie nods in understanding.

"I have a surgery." I say as I excuse myself. "Page me when the MRI results are in."

Before my surgery, I decide to slip into an on-call room and call Meredith. It's 9:30 so I'm not sure if she will pick up. I'm about to give up hope when the phone hits the third ring, but then it connects and Meredith's very sleepy voice comes through the phone.

"lo?"

"Hey, did I wake you?" I ask and hope that she was already awake.

"Mmmm yeah." She mumbles. I cringe to myself.

"Sorry, I'll let you go back to sleep. I just want you to know I'm heading into surgery." I say.

"Kay." Her voice is quiet and it sounds like she's already falling asleep again.

"I love you." I say.

"Kay." She mumbles then the line goes dead. I smile a little to myself before I exit the on-call room and head towards the OR.

* * *

Halfway through my surgery my pager goes off.

"Can someone check that please?" I ask. One of the nurses grabs it from the tray table and reads the tiny screen.

"It's from Dr. Torres. She says the MRI results are in." The nurse says.

"Page he back. Tell her I'll take a look as soon as I'm out of surgery." The nurse taps a few buttons on the small device before she sets it back down and gives me a thumbs up.

My hands are barely dry as I leave the scrub room and head down to radiology. I find Arizona and Callie in a viewing room. They're having a quiet conversation while looking over the scans.

"You don't even need me." I joke as I enter the room.

"Oh we need you alright." Arizona says. "We aren't sure where the clot is, but there are two very likely candidates." I step closer to the light board while Arizona points out the two spots she mentioned.

"I'll be damned." I say as I examine the scans. "That's the clot," I point with my pen to a slightly darker mass on scan. "and that is a ruptured cyst." I point to the other spot that is also a darker mass but slightly bigger and surrounded by fluid.

"It must have ruptured from the impact." Callie says. "Question is: which is causing the paralysis?"

"I'd still go with the clot but the cyst needs to be drained." I say. "I can handle the clot and the two of you can drain the cyst."

"I'd feel more comfortable if Weller or Nelson did that." Arizona says. "I'll still supervise but I don't think that she will have the best possible chance if I'm lead surgeon."

"I respect that." I say nodding.

"Why don't we get Dr. Weller on board then I can assist with the clot and Dr. Robbins can assist with the cyst." Callie suggests.

"Sounds like a plan to me." I say as I whip out my pager to page Dr. Weller. A few moments later, he enters the viewing room and we brief him on our plan before we go into more detail about how the surgery will go.

While Callie and Arizona go to talk to the parents and Kaylee I head to my office so I can have a few minutes of quiet to check on Meredith.

" _Hey you up?"_ I text her first so that I don't wake her if she's asleep. A few moments later my phone rings.

"Dr. Shepherd speaking." I say professionally. Meredith giggles on the other end of the line.

"You didn't check the caller ID did you?" She teases.

"Guilty." I say. "How are you?"

"Bored." She says. "I'm reading Anna Karenina."

"Is it good?" I ask.

"I'm on the second page and I already feel like I could fall asleep." She grumbles.

"Well you do need to rest." I joke. "You did just have major surgery."

"Ha ha." Meredith says dryly. "What are you up to?" She not so subtly changes the subject.

"Callie, Arizona, Weller and I are about to operate on a little girl who was hit by a car and now has a clot and a ruptured cyst in her spine." I tell her.

"Ooh can you tape that please?" She asks.

"Will do." I say as my pager blares. "I'm sorry I have to go."

"Okay have fun." Meredith says.

"Love you have fun with your book." I say then I hang up before I can hear her snarky reply.

* * *

"Time of death, 17:26." I say dejectedly. Callie, Arizona, Dr. Weller and myself just spent the better part of four hours trying to save this little girl's leg function only to have her stroke out as I was closing. "Damnit." I curse as I pull the headlamp off. Everyone looks dejected especially Callie. I rip off my gloves and dump them in the biohazard bin as I head to the scrub room. The other three doctors follow me and we all line up at the sink as we scrub out.

"I'll tell the parents." I say.

"I'll come with you." Callie says. "I was the lead on the case. I should be there." The room descends into silence once more. Callie and I finish scrubbing out and she leads to the waiting room. Kaylee's parents jump up when they see us.

"Mr. and Mrs. Bryant," Callie begins and their faces drop just from her tone of voice. "The operation was successful however when we were closing Kaylee stroked out and we were unable to resuscitate her." Their faces fall with every word until Mrs. Bryant descends into tears and Mr. Bryant is clinging to his wife with wet eyes.

"Oh. Oh God." Mrs. Bryant cries.

"We're very sorry for your loss." I say softly. "We did everything we could."

"It's all my fault." Mrs. Bryant sobs, seemingly oblivious to everything we said. "I…I should have…should have checked." Callie steps forward and lays a sympathetic hand on her shoulder.

"This isn't your fault." Callie whispers. "This stuff just happens. We don't know why it just…does." Mrs. Bryant keeps crying and Mr. Bryant wraps his arms around his wife. Callie steps back and turns away quickly but not fast enough to hide the wetness in her own eyes. I quickly follow after her only stopping at the nurses' station to make sure the Bryants are taken care of. I chase after Callie and follow her as she veers into a supply closet. I discreetly page Arizona before sliding to the floor next to Callie.

"She shouldn't have died." Callie whispers through her tears. "She should be in recovery not the morgue."

"I know." I say.

"It isn't fair." She cries.

"I know." I repeat because it's all I know to say. The door creaks open and from the sliver of light let in by the open door I can see Arizona. I stand and Arizona and I switch places. I give them both a polite nod before letting myself out of the supply closet and heading to my office. I'm off at six and it is currently 5:53 so I figure I'll change and go home a few minutes early. After today I really just want to go home and climb into bed. I text Meredith that I'm on my way before I step onto the elevator that will take me to staff parking

When I pull into the driveway I feel relieved. I pull the keys out of the ignition and grab my briefcase from the passenger seat. I didn't pick up any food on the way home so I figure we'll probably have cereal for dinner. I let myself into the house and drop my things by the front door. I practically run upstairs and I skid to a halt in front of our ajar bedroom door.

"Hey." Meredith lights up when she sees me. "I've been so excited for you to get home. I want to hear all about your surg…. Derek what's wrong?" She asks. Her demeanor shifts from excitement to concern.

"I uh, didn't grab the video." I confess. "The patient died and I forgot you wanted to see it." I sidle over to the bed and drop onto my stomach

"I'm sorry." Meredith says softly as she runs her fingers through my hair.

"Yeah, me too." I say sullenly.

"What happened?" She asks cautiously.

"Everything was textbook." I say. "But she stroked out as we were closing and we couldn't get her back."

"That sucks." Meredith says.

"Yeah, Callie said the same thing." I say. "She was really attached to this girl. She's taking it kind of hard." Meredith grunts a little as she goes from lying against the pillows to sitting up completely on her own. She turns so that she is sitting sideways on the bed and she crosses her legs. She takes my hand and draws circles on the back of it with her thumb.

"Do you want to tell me about it?" She asks softly.

"Not really." I say.

"Do you just want to wallow?" She asks.

"Yeah." I mumble.

"Okay." She says softly. She shifts so she's lying on her back beside me. She grabs my hand again. "I love you." She breathes.

* * *

 **AN: OMG I MISSED TWO UPDATES. I have a good reason though. I had a bit of a family medical emergency to deal with and it really screwed everything up. Don't worry everything is going back to normal. That means there will be an update last week. Also keep leaving your awesome reviews because I love reading them. Ciao for now.**


	21. Day 20

**Day 20**

I wake to the sound of Meredith retching in the bathroom across the hall. The clock on my nightstand tells me it is a little after one in the morning. I quickly hop out of bed and hurry into the bathroom. Meredith is on her knees in front of the toilet. One hand is gripping the side of the toilet while the other is trying, and failing, to hold her hair back. I sit down beside her and hold her hair in a loose ponytail while I rub her back. She gags into the toilet two more times before she sits back on her heels and wipes her mouth with the back of her hand.

"How long have you been in here?" I ask.

"Dunno." She says hoarsely. I frown as I continue to rub her back.

"What are you feeling?" I ask. I put my hand to her forehead; it doesn't feel warm.

"Dizzy and I have a headache." She says as she rubs her eyes.

"Do you think you need to go to the hospital?" I ask.

"I…dunno." She admits. It wasn't the answer I wanted to hear but at least she's being honest. In my head I start going through the possible causes of her sudden onset of illness.

"Did you take your pills?" I ask.

"Yeah, before I went to sleep last night." She mumbles. She crosses her arms and rests them on the toilet seat. She then leans forward and rests her head against her arms.

"Have you been drinking water?" I ask.

"Mhmm." She mumbles.

"When was the last time you ate?" I ask.

"Dunno like five-ish last night? Before you came home cus I ran outta cereal." I run back into the bedroom and grab the prescription bottles. Percocet only causes nausea if taken without food in the stomach but the antibiotics? Well it does say TAKE WITH FOOD in big black letters under the instructions. I curse to myself as I head back to the bathroom.

"It's the antibiotics." I say as I drop down beside Meredith. She's gone from resting her head on the toilet seat to lying on the floor.

"M'kay." She says slinging her arm over her eyes.

"You didn't have enough food in your stomach to take them." I say as I run my fingers through her hair. "Why don't I help you back to bed then I'll go make you a small snack so you can retake them.'

"Kay." Meredith sighs. I slide my arms under her and lift her in one easy motion. I bring her back into our room and lay her on the bed, tucking the blankets back around her and promising to be right back. I head downstairs to the kitchen where I flick the light on and blink as my eyes adjust to the lighting. Opening the fridge, I sigh and take in the options for food. I decide to toast a bagel and so I pop one in the toaster and lean back onto the counter. As I close my eyes, the reality of what just happened hits me. Meredith just got sick because she hadn't eaten. She didn't deliberately not eat; she just wasn't able to get food on her own. I'm partially responsible for feeding her because I'm supposed to bring her food but I was so wrapped up in my own crap I forgot to feed her. It sounds very fatherly but the fact of the matter is that Meredith needed me and I let her down.

The toaster dings letting me know the bagel is ready. I spread a little butter on it and bring it upstairs. When I get to our room, I find Meredith dozing peacefully.

"Mer, wake up." I whisper

"Mmm?" She grumbles.

"Can you sit up for a second?" I ask. She doesn't answer, instead she shifts so she's propped up by her elbows. I help her sit the rest of the way up before I hand her the bagel. "Eat." I instruct gently. She obeys and quickly devours the whole thing. I then pour her pills into my hand and hand her a bottle of water. "Take these." I say. She does and when she's done she lies back down. I pull the blanket up around her before I step around the bed and climb in on my side. I snuggle up close to her and listen to her breathe softly.

"I'm sorry." I blurt into the darkness.

"For what?" She mumbles.

"It's my fault you got sick." I confess. "I forgot to get you food last night, that's why you got sick."

"S'okay." She says. "I'm okay."

"I know but you could have not been." I protest. "It would have been my fault."

"I'm not mad." She mumbles. "I'm not sick. Coulda been worse." She yawns and I take that as my cue to finish the conversation later.

* * *

A few hours later the alarm blares and wakes me up. I scramble to shut it off so it doesn't wake Meredith too. I sit up and rub my eyes blearily trying to recall my schedule for the day. I don't have any surgeries until the afternoon and I have no consults. On an impulse, I roll over and grab my phone. I quickly dial Richard's number; unsurprisingly I get voicemail.

"Hey Richard it's Derek. I'm going to be in late today; Meredith isn't feeling well. I'll have Nelson cover my rounds. If it's an emergency I can come in but I'd rather not leave Meredith." I leave a quick message before hanging up. I contemplate who else to call before I finally decide on Cristina.

"Yang." She mumbles sleepily after she picks up on the second ring.

"Cristina it's Derek." I say tentatively.

"What do you want?" She grumbles.

"You're off today right?" I ask.

"Yeah that's why I was still sleeping." She snaps.

"Do you think that you could come stay with Meredith this afternoon around noonish?" I barrel on.

"Yeah why?" Her tone shifts from annoyance to concern.

"We had a bit of a…mishap with her meds and she got kind of sick. She's okay but I don't want to leave her alone just in case." I tell her.

"Yeah, fine I'll be there around noon." She says.

"Thank you."

"Yeah, yeah." She dismisses before she hangs up. I sigh and flop back against the pillows. I highly doubt I'll be able to fall back to sleep but I decide to curl up beside Meredith and at least wake up a little before I try to seize the day or whatever.

Meredith stirs maybe an hour later.

"Hey." I whisper as I brush her hair back from her face.

"Hey." She scrunches her nose in confusion. "What are you doing here? I thought you had to work today."

"I'm going in later." I explain.

"Why?" She asks.

"I don't want you to be by yourself today." I say.

"Derek I'm fine." She insists.

"In all likelihood yes, but I don't want to risk it." I say. "I don't have anything until this afternoon." Meredith sighs and it looks like she's contemplating arguing but eventually she deflates and curls into me.

"I love you." I mumble as I kiss the top of her head. She mumbles some sort of reply that I can't quite make out but, before I can ask her what she said, she's already asleep again. I contemplate just pulling her towards me and cuddling but instead I decide to get up and make her breakfast. I decide on waffles with bacon and strawberries. I heat up the waffle iron while I make the batter. As the waffles cook, I slice up the strawberries while the bacon sizzles on the stove. I top off my small feast with some whipped cream and syrup. I pour a glass of orange juice and bring my creation upstairs. Meredith appears to be asleep but it's almost time for her next pill.

"Meredith, wake up." I say softly.

"Nnnn." She groans and burrows deeper into the covers.

"Only for a few minutes." I say. "I just want you to eat again." At the mention of food, Meredith peaks out from under the duvet.

"Waffles?" She asks lighting up.

"Waffles." I confirm. She sits up eagerly and I place the food on her lap. She digs in hungrily. In minutes she has devoured the entire meal. She grabs her pills from the bedside table and quickly knocks them back with a swig of OJ. She sets the plate and the glass on the bedside table before she lies back down again. Her eyes droop closed as she wiggles herself into a comfortable position. I gently stroke her hair as she falls asleep. She breathes in slow, soft breaths and then she suddenly lets out a very loud snore. I chuckle as I leave her to rest.

I head back downstairs and clean up the mess I left after making breakfast. I do the dishes and take out the trash. When I'm done, I go through our cabinets and take stock of what we have for food. I find a few things that will hold Meredith over for today before I sit down at the kitchen table to make a shopping list. I figure I'll stop at the grocery store on my way home tonight. I check my watch and almost jump in surprise when I realize it's eleven-thirty. I want to leave around noon so I have time to check up on my first patient. I hurry to shower and change in time to leave. The doorbell rings at noon sharp. When I open the door Cristina is standing on the other side with a takeout pizza and some ice cream.

"Hey." I say as I step aside to let her in. "Meredith was still asleep last I checked. Feel free to do whatever; I should be back around eight." I grab my briefcase before giving Cristina a curt nod of understanding before heading out the door.

* * *

The drive to the hospital is uneventful, albeit fast. I pull into the parking lot at quarter after. Once I pass the sliding glass doors I make a beeline for the Attendings Lounge. I find it empty as I head to the bathroom to change. However, when I come back out I find Dr. Bailey pouring herself a cup of coffee. When she notices me standing there, her eyes narrow.

"What's wrong with my intern." She demands.

"You know she is a resident now right?" I try to lighten her glare. It doesn't work.

"I don't care. Why are you here late?" She crosses her arms.

"She accidently took her antibiotics on an empty stomach and it made her sick." I say. "She's okay so far, I just didn't want her to be alone. Cristina is with her." Bailey ponders what I've said before she nods.

"Okay then." She nods resolutely and turns to leave.

"That's it?" I blurt in surprise. Bailey turns on her heel to look at me.

"It was a mistake. Those occur from time to time. I just didn't want to be surprised if I was paged to the pit for a consult." I nod and Bailey leaves the lounge.

* * *

My day is short and by the time six o'clock rolls around I'm on my way home much earlier than I thought I would be. I'm a little disappointed to admit that I only did the bare minimum today, but Meredith is more important. When I get home, I find Meredith and Cristiana sprawled across our bed watching a surgical tape. It looks like some sort of plastics procedure. Cristina appears to be taking notes while Meredith is just watching for pleasure.

"Hey." Meredith smiles when she spots me in the doorway. Cristina looks up at the sound of Meredith's voice; she nods in acknowledgment before she turns back to the TV.

"Hey." I say as I step further into the room. "Which one is it this time?"

"Skin grafting. Cristina got in on a burn patient with Sloan tomorrow." Meredith tells me.

"Have you guys eaten yet?" I ask. Meredith shakes her head. "Any requests then?"

"Anything but pizza." She says. "Cristina do you want anything?"

"No." Cristina says. "I should get going anyways." She closes her notebook and rolls off the bed. She's gone before Meredith and I can protest. Meredith sighs and she sounds defeated.

"I'm worried about her." She says. "This whole merger thing is hitting her hard."

"Yeah?" I say as sit beside Meredith on the bed.

"Yeah, she really wants to pursue cardio but we barely have any cardio surgeries as it is and the ones we do get she can't get on." Meredith sighs. "She can barely even get on a skin graft. The only reason she got the one tomorrow is because Mark felt bad for the whole penis pump thing."

"I can try and help. I have a chordotomy coming in tomorrow. I can try and get her in on that." I offer. Meredith practically lights up.

"Really? You'd do that?" She asks.

"Of course." I say.

"I love you so much right now." She giggles as she rolls on top of me.

"I love you too." I smile up at her.

* * *

 **AN: So this would have been up yesterday were I not really lazy. Truth be told I tried but my computer decided to update so I just said fuck it and went to bed. I'm sorry. Anyway leave a review. Hopefully they're working again. Assuming the reviews are working, this chapter will push the reviews over 100!**


	22. Day 21

**Day 21**

When the alarm blares at 6:30 I immediately roll out of bed and head for the shower. Last night didn't go any further than a heated make out session; it did wake the beast though. By the beast I mean my libido which has been dormant since Meredith's surgery. But now she is feeling better and she wants to get back into the swing of things, healing liver or not. Either way, my horny teenage self was very disappointed that we didn't even make it to second base. So now, I'm left to…relieve myself in the shower.

When I come back into the bedroom I find Meredith awake. She still has sleep clinging to her every pore but she smirks at me insinuating that she knows exactly what I just did. I don't acknowledge her taunt, instead I grab my watch and secure it around my wrist before I give myself a final once over in the mirror. When I'm satisfied by my appearance I turn away from the mirror and move over to the side of the bed; I crouch so I'm eye level with Meredith. I kiss her gently and she reciprocates with a kiss of her own.

"Take care of yourself today." I whisper.

"Okay." She mumbles. We lock lips one more time before I stand and grab my bag that I left by the end of the bed.

"Door open or closed?" I ask.

"Open." She says.

"I love you." I call over my shoulder.

"You too." She calls after me.

* * *

I make it to the hospital much earlier than I expected. My first stop is to the coffee cart to get some breakfast. After that I take the long way to the Attendings locker room so I can check the OR board. Mark and Cristian are still in surgery and it looks like they won't be out until after rounds. I continue to the locker room where I find Owen and Callie also getting ready for their days.

"I'm so jealous of Arizona." Callie grumbles as she pulls her scrubs on. "She gets to sleep in and doesn't have to show up until noon."

"Isn't she on until noon tomorrow though?" Owen asks.

"Yeah but she still gets to sleep in." Callie grumbles.

"I think I'd rather show up early for a twelve hour than later for a twenty-four." I say as I clip my ID badge to the breast pocket on my scrubs.

"Ugh guys I haven't had my coffee yet and I just wanted to bitch. Stop ruining it with your completely sensible reasoning." She huffs and storms off. Owen and I just shrug at each other.

* * *

I catch up to Cristina almost immediately after rounds.

"You're with me today." I declare as we begin walking side by side.

"Oh?" She says.

"Yes." I confirm. "Meredith said you were in need of a god. Hello neuro god right here."

"I'm going to kick her ass as soon as her liver grows back." Cristina mumbles.

"Chordotomy, open, a solid five hours of spinal surgery and you get to assist." I offer handing her the chart. Despite her earlier remarks, her eyes gleam at the prospect of a surgery. "Patient is in room 5602. Get him an MRI, the surgery is at four." Cristina immediately moves away from me and heads towards the patient's room

I decide to use the time I have before Cristina returns with the scans to review some scans for potential consult cases. I hole myself up in an imaging room and place all the scans on light boards. I'm not far into making notes on the second case when I hear the door swing open and someone enter. I turn expecting Cristina; I find Isaac, an imaging tech, standing before me holding a manila envelope.

"Dr. Shepherd, these are for you." He says in a thick accent that sounds like it's from somewhere in Eastern Europe. I'm confused as to where these scans are coming from but I brush it off thinking that maybe Cristina got held up in an emergency. Instead of the scans of my chordotomy patient, I find spinal scans showing a huge tumor eating up half the spine. I slowly put the scans onto the light board and I am in awe at the magnificence of this tumor.

"Woah." I whisper. "Is this guy even able to walk?" I look to Isaac who nods. That wasn't the answer I expected. "I'd love to be the surgeon to take this out."

"Well now you have the chance." Isaac says. "That's my tumor and I want you to remove it."

"Isaac I didn't mean…" I begin to protest but Isaac doesn't give me the chance.

"I've researched a lot of neurosurgeons and if anyone can do it, it is you." Before I have a chance to argue, Cristina comes in with the scans for my chordotomy patient.

"Dr. Shepherd I have the scans for-Wow; I want to operate on that." Cristina says when she sees the scans. She sets the manila envelope on the ledge of the light boxes and steps forward to take a closer look.

"It's my tumor." Isaac speaks up. Cristina glances at him but her attention can't be drawn from the tumor in front of us.

"Are you going to take it out?" Cristina looks at me like a kid hoping for ice cream and I find myself having a hard time saying no.

"Why don't you get another scan and I'll asses from there." I say addressing both Cristina and Isaac. "Get him a full work up." I say glancing at Cristina. "Make sure Mr. Carston is prepped for his surgery at four too." Cristina nods eagerly before she leads Isaac out of the room.

* * *

I page Callie to come take a look at Isaac's tumor and she brings Lexie along with her. The two of them, myself and Cristina all cram into the imaging booth. I'm sitting in the rolling chair in front of the monitor and Cristina is eagerly looking over my shoulder. Instead of looking at the monitor, Callie and Lexie are looking through the window to the MRI machine.

"I can't believe Isaac has a tumor." Callie mutters for the umpteenth time.

"Please tell me the rumors aren't true. Isaac has a tumor?" Arizona asks as she steps into the imaging booth.

"Yep." I say as the images begin to roll up on the computer screen.

"It's huge." Cristina breathes.

"It's a shame." Arizona says mournfully. "He's such a great guy. He diagnosed an osteosarcoma on one of my patients. There was a tiny spot on the x-ray. I completely missed it."

"Woah that thing is huge." Mark says from the doorway of the booth.

"It's Isaac's." Callie tells him.

"Who's?" Mark looks utterly clueless. Arizona rolls her eyes.

"He's a radiology tech Mark." She gripes. Her, Mark and Callie get in a discussion about something but it is totally lost on me as I stare at the monitor in front of me.

"Do you think you'll be able to operate?" Cristina's excitement filled question pulls me from my trance.

"Maybe." I say somewhat cryptically as I press a few buttons and have the scans printed and sent to my office. "However, right now I have a surgery in twenty minutes. Dr. Yang?" I say as I stand and leave the booth. Cristina follows me obediently as we head to OR 5.

* * *

"Hey it's me. I was just calling to check in and say hi. I might be home a little late. I love you. Call me if you need anything." I leave Meredith a voicemail and do my best to ignore the twinge of worry that's in my gut. Instead I send out a mass page to all the residents that there's a meeting in the skills lab in 15 minutes. Normally for a surgery like this, I'd pick Meredith automatically. It isn't out of favoritism but because I know she has the skills to handle something like this. However, at this point in time she can barely make it through a couple hours of light activity before needing a nap to recharge. So I head to the skills lab and set up my idea for picking a resident. Most of the residents arrive quickly and so I get started. I explain the challenge to them and I can't help but cringe when Cristina starts to get over-confident. Unfortunately, I have to pick Jackson Avery over Cristina and the look of utter defeat across her face and Meredith's voice berating me in my head slay me. On my way out the door, I assign Lexie her task and remind Jackson to get a full night's sleep for tomorrow. My final step is to face off the chief for the OR time to do the surgery.

"What happened to you." I growl at Richard. "The Chief I know would be encouraging me to do this surgery not shutting it down."

"Derek I'm saying no." Richard declares forcefully. I shake my head and disgust and walk away before I do something I regret. I refuse to take no for an answer and as I stalk off to my car I formulate a plan to get around Richard.

* * *

When I get home, I'm surprised to find the house is dark with the exception of the lights that we usually leave on all the time.

"Meredith?" I call out softly when I enter the house. I don't want to wake her if she's asleep but I'm confused by how quiet the house is. I check upstairs first and she isn't in any of the bedrooms. My heart starts pounding a little bit as I head back downstairs. My worry is eased when I find her passed out on the couch with her face smooshed into a throw pillow.

"Meredith." I whisper softly as I gently place my hand on her back. She's lying on her side and loosely covered by a fleece blanket. I rub my hand up and down the soft material. "Meredith." I whisper again. I brush her hair away from her face. I'm surprised when my hand brushes across her forehead and it's cold and sticky with dried sweat. "Meredith." I try again with a gentle shake of her shoulder. This time she moans and blindly pushes at me with the hand that had previously been curled under her chin. I chuckle at the gesture and gently kiss her cheek. Her eyes crack open and she grins at me sleepily.

"Hey." I say softly.

"Hi." She mumbles as she rubs her eyes. "When'd you get home?"

"A couple minutes ago." I say as I slide my hand under the blanket to rub her side. "Jesus Mer. You're all sweaty." I pull my hand back as if I've been burnt.

"Alex came over. We went for a walk." She offers by way of explanation.

"Up Mount Rainier?" I ask jokingly.

"No. Around the block." She burrows deeper into the pillow. "I kinda conked out after." She gives a tiny self-deprecating laugh. "It's sad how tired I was."

"That's okay, you're still recovering." I offer encouragingly. The looks she shoots me tells me that wasn't the answer she wanted to hear. "Do you want to take a shower?" I change the subject quickly.

"Yeah." She sits up slowly and swings her legs over the side of the couch. I follow her upstairs to the bathroom. She's still slow and lethargic and I'm kind of worried she'll fall asleep standing up. However, she makes it to the bathroom okay.

"How was your day?" She asks over the roar of the water as we step into the shower.

"Good." I say understatedly. "The cordotomy went flawlessly."

"That's good." She mumbles as she rests her head against my shoulder. I want to tell her about Isaac's tumor but I decide against it. As much as I would love to gush, she's tired right now and restless enough at home as it is. So I hold my tongue as we gently rock back and forth under the stream of warm water. When the ten minutes are up, I help her out of the shower and into clean, sweat-free pajamas. She climbs into bed but she doesn't lie down and immediately fall asleep like I expected.

"Can we order takeout?" She asks instead. I nod in surprise.

"Pizza?" I assume as I pick up the phone and dial the familiar number of the pizza place a couple blocks away. Within half an hour a delivery boy shows up at our door with a chicken Caesar salad for me and a meat lovers pizza for Meredith. She demolishes half the pizza in the time it takes me to finish my salad. I quickly store the pizza in the fridge and I have no doubt that it will be her lunch tomorrow. When I return upstairs, all the lights are off in our room except my bedside lamp. Meredith is resting on her side with a pillow jammed under her right hip for support. I flick the light off and climb into bed behind her. I throw my arm over her chest. Our fingers tangle and I bury my face in the back of her neck.

"I love you." I mumble into her hair.

* * *

 **AN: So you might recognize pieces of this chapter from the show. I'm breaking this episode up into three chapters instead of jamming it all into one because it appears a few days pass on the show too. Tell me what you think in the reviews. Also I would like to mention this story has passed a hundred reviews. Keep it up you guys!**


	23. Day 22

**Day 22**

I sneak out of the house early the next morning. Meredith doesn't stir when I kiss her goodbye and I don't make any effort to wake her. It's still dark when I arrive at the hospital. I grab a coffee from the cart and head upstairs to check on my post-ops. My team has already arrived except for Arizona. Jackson and Lexie spent the night while Callie and Mark arrived at the same time. Cristina is also lurking around somewhere because she was on call last night. All of my post-ops remained stable and Isaac has been prepped overnight. We're ready to roll by sunrise. Mark got me a slot on the board and Owen made sure the chief was occupied then we wheeled Isaac into surgery. The nurses and the anesthesiologist are sworn to secrecy. The gallery is closed and the doors are guarded by Callie and Arizona. Mark and Owen stand behind me as my support system while Jackson and Lexie are across the table.

"It's a beautiful day to save lives." I say. "Ten blade." Right after I make the first incision, I hear a vibration.

"It's your phone sir." One of the nurses speak up. "It's a message from Dr. Grey."

"Leave it Charlene. If it's an emergency, she'll call." I say. The nurse looks skeptical but she obeys.

By lunchtime, I haven't made a single cut and it's starting to get to me. Lexie keeps telling me I need to take a break. Mark and Owen offer suggestions over my shoulder but they're more of a nuisance than a help. Dr. Avery is getting fed up with doing nothing more than suctioning and the anesthesiologist keeps reminding me that the longer Isaac is under, the harder it is keep him stable. I try tuning it all out but I can hear Mark and Owen mumbling worriedly behind me.

"Will everyone please shut up?" I shout suddenly. The room goes dead quiet and everyone looks at me startled. "Thank you." I mumble. I step back and roll my neck to get the kinks out. I step back to the table and continue to go through my options.

It's nearing dinnertime and I still haven't made a single move. Jackson has stepped back from the table and Lexie has given up on trying to get me to take a break. I think Callie and Arizona have given up on their posts and my suspicions are confirmed when suddenly the door bangs open and I automatically know it isn't Callie or Arizona. They have been popping their heads in periodically but they were quiet and respectfully about it. I turn to face a very angry Richard Webber.

"Shepherd what the hell are you doing?" He demands. "Close this man up now."

"No." I protest with equal force. Suddenly Lexie runs out of the room muttering something about not being hardcore enough. I try to keep going but I can sense Owen and Mark exchanging glances behind my back. The chief is staring me down and Jackson looks relieved.

"Derek the longer you leave him open the more chance he has to contract an infection." Richard pushes. I sigh with reluctance and put my tools down. The scrub nurse beside me hands me the sutures silently. My stomach feels as if it sinks to my shoes with every stich I put in Isaac's back. When I'm finished, he is flipped onto his back and wheeled to recovery. The Chief leaves and Jackson follows Isaac to recovery. It's the most boring post op ever because Isaac is basically recovering from a glorified gash. I head to the scrub room and Mark follows me silently. I slam things around in my frustration and Mark doesn't say anything, he only starts scrubbing at the sink next to mine. When I'm done I dry my hands on a paper towel. Before I leave I turn face Mark expecting him to say something. He just shrugs.

"You tried man. Maybe there just wasn't a way. Sleep on it." With those words of wisdom, he walks out of the room. I sigh and pull my scrub cap off. I ball it up in my fists as I walk down the hall. People stare and whisper about how I bravely defied the chief only to fail. I make it to the Neuro ICU and a nurse hands me Isaac's chart with a look of pure pity. I take a few of the other charts and plant myself in the chair at Isaac's bedside. I look over the notes for the day while I wait for Isaac to come to. I'm dreading telling him that I couldn't do it but I figure it best for him to hear it from me. When his eyes do crack open, I feel a lump the size of a softball form at the back of my throat.

"I couldn't do it." I blurt before he even has the chance to say anything. "I tried, I'm sorry Isaac." To my surprise he chuckles.

"There's always a way." He says in a cryptic tone. "Sleep on it. Come back tomorrow." He says before shooing me away with his hand. I stand and leave. I want to brush off what he said and pretend it was the drugs talking but somehow his words have worked their way under my skin. Before I have time to further contemplate, I find myself face to face with Cristina.

"You're in deep shit McDreamy." She states as she crosses her arms.

"What? Why?" I'm more surprised by her sudden presence than I am her words.

"Well, when your wife couldn't reach you and was a bit miffed that you didn't wake her to say goodbye, she called me. When she asked where you were I told her you were resecting Isaac's giant tumor not realizing you hadn't told her about Isaac's giant tumor." She tells me. "So as you can imagine, she is pretty pissed."

"Fantastic." I mutter under my breath. A pissed of Meredith is just what I need today. Cristina gives me an unsympathetic look before turning on her heel and returning to whatever she was doing before I walked by. When I glance at my phone I notice multiple texts and two missed calls all from Meredith. Instead of returning the calls I decide to just go home instead. My shift is long over anyways.

On the way home I stop at the pizza place Meredith likes and I nab some ice cream from the grocery store. I know she would not be impressed if I came home with flowers but maybe junk food can win her over. When I pull into the driveway I observe that our bedroom light is on and I can make out the faint glow of the TV. I begrudgingly make my way up the front walk and to the door. When I walk in the door I can hear the TV but as soon as I shut it, the sound stops. I sigh as I kick of my shoes and trudge upstairs. When I push open the door to our bedroom, I find Meredith sitting up with her arms crossed and a scowl on her face.

"How was your day?" She practically spits.

"Long." I say. I hold the pizza out in front of me like a peace offering but also a shield. Meredith eyes the pizza warily before reaching out and taking it from me. Her look doesn't soften but she takes the pizza and that's a step.

"He's not dead is he?" She blurts and her tone shifts from hurt to concern.

"No he's not dead." I mumble. "He's not tumorless either." I say under my breath but Meredith catches it.

"What do you mean he's not tumorless?" She asks.

"He still has the tumor. I couldn't get it out." I explain. I start taking off my socks and my belt in an effort to unwind and escape the stress of the day.

"Did you at least get some of it out?" She asks.

"Nope. I didn't make one cut." I pull of my belt and throw it in the direction of my closet.

"So you stood in surgery for ten hours and…stared at the tumor?" All the anger has seeped out of Meredith's voice; it's been replaced by pure bafflement.

"Pretty much." I say as I untuck my shirt. I climb into the bed beside her and get comfortable on my back. "Enough about my day. Tell me about your day."

"My day? Oh, my day. Well I slept, and I ate a whole box of cereal. I read and gave up on Anna Karenina. I left three voicemails for Izzie; I'm sure she won't return any of them…" She trails off and looks at me pleadingly.

"You want to talk about the tumor." I say.

"Yes please. I'm a surgery junkie." She begs. I sit up against the pillows so we're face to face.

"The tumor was even more vascularized than the scans showed." I begin. "I mean the thing was HUGE." I try to think of a way to show her without breaking HIPPA laws. That's when I spot the container of markers sitting on Meredith's bedside table.

"You know what? Here." I say as I pull the bed forward to turn it around.

"What are you doing?" Meredith asks in a panicked tone.

"Just watch." I say as I stand up on the bed armed with a black marker. "This is the spine." I say drawing out the helix like shape that represents a spine. "This is the tumor." I continue drawing. Meredith sits back and watches as I add details. She asks the occasional question but for the most part she is quiet as I vividly describe the tumor. When I feel I can add no more detail, I lie down beside her and finish with: "I just don't know where to start."

"You didn't close him up though." I pick my head up and look at her to continue. "You had his permission to cut the cord but you didn't. Any other surgeon would have. So there must be a way." Her logic makes sense despite my current lack of faith in myself. I stare at the drawing on the wall. Meredith falls asleep long before I can even think about it. When I do finally manage to fall asleep, it's already 1 AM.

"I love you." I mumble sleepily into the back of Meredith's neck.

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 **AN: OH MY GOD. My life has gone to hell. Long story short a family member got on a motorcycle without a helmet and now he's brain dead. It hasn't been good guys. I'm sorry if the updates get a bit spotty but I'm also starting school and trying to juggle a bunch of other stuff. I hope you like this chapter anyways and leave a review. Thanks for understanding (or not).**


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